twisted gerl

2005-10-16T01:14:00.000-07:00

.... Reborn...

Hoho.. its been a while since i update.. i haf no tyme even to on ma comp.. i miss msn and kepo-ing thru ppl blog.. HEH..

life been preeti much the same.. except that im a yr older now.. so yeah hapi BELATED berfdae to me :) the celebration was nice... 3 daes in a row with ppl that means alot to me.. thanks to the kids who willing to take tyme oof and haf a gathering after so long.. ohh how i miss slacking with them everidae... :( thanks to the obriens crew fopr the DELICIOUS ice cream cake.. that was the nicest cake i ever receive sia..

and of course thanks to ma beloved bf for taking his tyme to please me.. oh well he does that every time not onli on ma berfdae.. heart him so much..

fir and khus will be serving the nation soon.. gosh.. life gona be quiet without them for awhile.. im gona miss ma darling fir as he's ma onli shopping,werking,gossiping and everything buddy i can ever find.. he's the onli guy i can relate gerls stuff with cause maybe he do act like a gerl.. HAHAHA.. no.. he's not soft or gay but the way he is.. so gerl gerl.. so quite.. take a fucking hell long tyme just to change clothes and iron his clothes very neatly... i wish im like him.. :)

had a tough week but managed to overcome it.. :)

last nite was a blast... wat more can i ask for with four guys whom i loved so much keeping me company... im so happy to see ma dearest bf having fun as well with ma dearest buds...

it make me smile just to see them having fun... these guys are the onli things that matter to me...

therefore i loved them more than any thing in the world..

thanks to dearest tweet,fir and faliq for always pampering me and always company me whenever i need them.. :)

having dearest bf away for so long.. i do feel lonely and sad sometyimes but this guys will always be there to cheer me up..

oh yeah.. fasting mth sucks big tyme...

i tell you.. the smell of pretzzel infrotn of our shop alwaya wana make me munch into their ever so sweet soft PRETZIES..

haizzz...

the little boy will be turning 19 soon.. the youngest kid of all will be celebrating his befdae soon.. wow.. cannot kol him baby carrot animore.. HEH..

fuck.. im feeling so fucking hungry rite now.. damn hungry.. ok need to go off.. so longggggggg..

2005-09-24T09:38:00.000-07:00

......All tears.....

Some ppl hate me for the life im living.. sm adore ma style of life.. sum even resort to make others hate me just to be close with me..

seriously i dun hate or loved ma life.. ppl tend to blame fate for the life given.. but once again i truly belief we can make our fate much better if we reali want it..

frankly speaking i haf a fucking good life if i want it.. let see...

i haf a nice bunch of gd frens who willing to do anything for me and even hear ma shitty side of life.. but i choose to ignored them and their feelings...

i haf a nice family whom i loved so much.. they always wants ma tyme.. but again i ignored them and thgt can buy their love with gifts whhich is fucking wrongs..

i haf a nice boyfriend whom love me and always there for me.. but i push away everything for him and wanted more of his tyme.. again i guess im in the wrong.. im pushing him too hard..

which many parents wld buy a new fon straight away after the fucking daughter lose her fucking expensive fon??

which many bestfren wld forgive their bestfren for hurting them and neglecting them but they always there to help us?

which many boyfriend wld loved u so much and nvr ever once raise his voice or show his anger towards you even thoough u in the wrong and always give in to u?

yeah i haf all that but i ignored the facts..

i begining to hate myself for real...

why cant i show them the loved that i wanted to show but always ended up in the wrong way?

i dun need this fucking high paying job..

i dun need all the newest or latest gadget or handfons ard...

i dun need all the unwanted attention frm guys and gerls who dun even noe me..

i dun need to cry everynite wen i sleep till ma eyes swollen... *can i?*

am i reali such a burden to them?

to my mum. to my dearest bestie and ma beloved bf?

is it reali hard to understand me?

im just a simple gerl who need loved frm ma loved ones..

i didnt whine wen mum leave me all alone after she gave birth to me..

i didnt whine wen ma bestie cant spend tyme with me wen i can...

i didnt whine wen YOU leave for ns and dun let me go out with other guys.. i didnt even whine wen YOU priortised ur stupid job rather than the special dae i plan even u promised me 1st?

*the pain is still there*

im sick of this life im living rite now

everything seem so wrong

sumtimes or

maybe everytime

i always think

maybe or

rather will it be good for me to leave in ma own world without any of these ppl ard me>

sumtimes i wish

i wld just vanish into thin air and perish away...

im tired of all the tears that flow unwanted everynite..

im tired of trying to get things rite for me and others..

im tired of being ME...

im tired of being cloese with ppl but i cant let them bear the pain i haf...

maybe leaving this world wld make me a happy gerl...

cause im sick and tired of ma LIFE.....

2005-09-14T23:27:00.000-07:00

...Recovery...

8 more daes before i see him again... well didnt haf ani problems while he away though.. maybe im too tired entertaining ma own world that i barely haf time to whine about how much i miss him.. :)

Werk... as tiring as ever but it kinda of fun and cool as i get to werk with ma own frens for the past few weeks.. no stress, slack all the tyme and pocket full.. HEH..

i kinda of regret for not following the guys to china black yesterdae...

hope u guys haf fun.. alif and me was too tired to even walk home.. in the end.. onli khus,faliq,fir and tweet went.. gosh.. i becoming insane soon if i dun quit ma fucking job.. :(

i miss hanging ard and slacking.. fuck this job..

i dun even haf tyme to spend ma money away... all i do is wake up go werk come back go sleep and it goes on and on everidae...

i miss ma little bro.. didnt get to see him for the past week.. :(

bought this book called samir&samira.. the book is so fucking nice.. it's about a gerl who was brought up as a boy due to her fucking dad who was ashamed of having a daughter instead of a son..

she cant deny her true identity animore wen she finally fall in love...

haizzzz.. love.. ppl can just changed in matters of tymes...

ma head feel so heavy since last nite.. maybe i slept too much or maybe not.. fuck this job.. making me ill over and over again..

i miss ma bestie.. lets hang out dear.. :)

2005-09-09T22:42:00.000-07:00

...*Falling away*...

Finally he gone.. for 3 wks the most i guess... but i get by these few weeks occupying myself with the ever non stop stupid job and ma frens ard me.. :)

it's been a while i update and so much stuff happening lately..

went to wild2 wet with him and ma small brow as a blast as we haf tons of great fun.. i missed those daes wen im still a kid and get excited over mere stuff... haizzz..

yesterdae hangout with ma bros was the ebst.. it's been a long while we hang out till late nite.. decided tow atch movie but end up eating maggi goreng instead.. i miss them.. ma bros and ma bestie.. tweet dearest... thanks so much for the still believing in me... i hope our friendship wld change for the better and u wld always be ma bestie no matter what.. i heart u so much...

the feeling is so diff wen im hanging out with ma frens without ma bf.. it's not that im not enjoying myself wen ma bf is ard.. it just the feeling of excitement u share all alone with ur good frens.. every person in ur life haf diff feelings if u get wat i mean.. :)

hope these few weeks i get to bond closer with frens that i didnt get to see much...

the o briens chalet was funcore on the 2st nite.. abit dead during the 2nd nite.. too everione surprised i won 26 bux playin blackjack wen i nvr play cards or gamble in ma whole 20 yrs of life before.. im sucha a gd gambler i can forsee.. HAHAH..

i miss him so much and there still 2 wks to go... 4 sumone to accept that his gf dosent hang ard with gerls .. it must be hard..

cant blame me that im surrounded by guys all the tyme... they still rocks ma world... dosent mean i dun haf ani gerlfriends i cant bitch ard.. prepared to get shocked wen guys start to bitch.. HAHAHAH.. ohh i love ma frens...

i hope me and fir plans to go bangkok goes well.. i realiw ana fly with ma dearest frens and just haf fun.. I MISS HAVING FUN.. im all dead tired and serious at werk.. it's such a pain in the ass to be like that all the tyme wen im born playful and cheerful.. fuck seriousness.. it's a fucking deadly disease.. HAH..

and im shocked to hear wat ppl say about him...

why do ppl always make the rite move at the wrong tyme...

i dun regret of being with ma bf now even though u show interest in me now...

i just regret of u being wat u are now.. if onli u did that tons of mths ago.. i wld be delighted or moved.. but now i just freak out.. :(

all i hope now is that i cld wait patiently for him to be back....

ppl are scared that i might just vanish away but HEY... let see..

2005-08-22T22:37:00.000-07:00

....It ends tonite....

I guess i finally knew wats up with me nowdaes.. finally get the ans on why im so moody and tired and restless lately... not because of pms.. nah.. far frm it.. not becasue of ma fucking ugly werk schd.... but.... soon... im gona miss that sumone greatly..

i noe that dae will come but i try to push that ugly thgts away.. but time seem so short now..

daes pass by so quickly...

its bad enuff im far away frm ma lovable frens nowdaes.. and HE haf to go away as well.. oh wat a luck..

listening to tiger lily by matchbook dosent help now....

no one will accompany me on the fon till i fall asleep.. no one to bitch ard at nite after werk.. no one to call at any time of the dae even at 3 am...

no one to chat with at any of the time of the day.... and no one to cry to wen im being bully at werk:(

ma life gona be quiet soon wen the other half went away...

to YOU.. im sorie if i been in the most sucky behaviour ever..

i jus wana let u noe how much u mean to me and im sorie for all the asshole stuff that i did to you..

i guess.. thru this mths i knew him.. he the one who always give in and do what i want.. i feel so bad at times but i love him the way he are.. :)

ppl know how stubborn,ill brat and fucking pampered i am.. but still he love me the way i am..

i shall wait for ur return no matter how ugly or dark u look.. HAHAHAHAHAH..

i shall treat this 3-4 weeks as a holidae.. heh.. but no worries.. i wont go ard dating ppl...maybe just drooling can? luv u sweetheart...

2005-08-21T11:42:00.000-07:00

... Feelings...

So many kinda of feelings surround me lately.. sum are silly,sum are serious and sum are so fairytale..

the trip with dearest was all gd... gona miss his nite hugs :)

but i made ppl that matter so worry... didnt mean too..

and pls stop saying im gona abandon u.. didnt even thgt of that..

i lost one and nvr will i take the chance to lose u... i always keep u close to ma heart no matter wat i do.. u the onli one understand me.. im so sorie.. i hurt u again and again...

u will always be ma dearest fren i ever haf.. thats you.. muhammad rizal aka TWEET.. ma dearest BESTIE.. :)

sumtimes i dun feel you.. sumtimes i dun even understand you.. but i haf always love u all this while.. im such a bad gf if u wana agree ..

but i guess im dead inside..

maybe one dae i will live again to witness ur love.. but till than.. i wld always try me best to keep myself occupied with you on ma mind.................

2005-08-15T22:03:00.000-07:00

... The wedding CRASHEr...

my cute chubby cuzzie haf finally been safely married to her cute and freaking thin hubby.. HAH.. everything went well that dae and im proud to be there even though all i did was eating and shiting all dae long.. bought a cake for ma deary monster bro who turn just turn 8.. i love him so much.. muacks..

thanks dear for being there.. it means alot and i love u too..

the gig on sat was a rad.. well it was managed by a fren so u can guess how much fun we had....

it was funcore as most of the bands are frens band or good bands so u can guess how freaking tired we are all.. been standing frm one band to another but wowness arh..

im tired of ma werking place but shall not fucking discuss about that so as not to ruin ma hoilday mood... :)

i think myspace is the coolest thing

i can hear local bands stuff

and i just knew it and i just had an account.. i am so RETARDED.....

but still... im cool...

the grown up clans gona unite again soon as we are planning for a chalet this early sep.. gosh.. i miss them.. so much.. and him too.. 2 bad he dosent know im still terribly sorie about watever shite.. i still adore him.. maybe.. he isnt the bestfriend which i knew.. maybe i just lost ma bestfreind without realising it.. arh arh... fuck it...

i miss dear tweet... no more frequent foncalls like last time.... haizz..

but hey.. i got a new bestfren,enemy,bf in one guy...

he none other than my sick assy BF... he will always be there...

he such a great companion.. glad i found him..

but he can be such an assholes.. ermm... nvm.. u guys mite noe wat im saying if u noe him well. HEH..

but i adore him so much.. wonder wat it's gona feel like wen he gone for ns.. like i say ns is such a fucking bitch.. hahaha..

but i will wait for him though.. but u cute preeti boys out there can date me.. but no kissing or holding hands.. HAHAHAHAH.. thats wat's ma bf told me.. .. :)

......* EDITED*....

MA BOYFRIEND WAN ME TO TELL THE WHOLE WORLD he the one who open an account for me on MYSPACE.. he wan me to thank him in public.. THANK U ASSY.. there u go dear... ur thak you speech.. :)

2005-08-11T04:05:00.000-07:00

*Save me sorrow*

Im so sick rite now... maybe due to not enuff sleep and rest.. im so tired and fucking dead to go werk animore.. but wat can i do.. commitments haf been made and we haf to abide that.. haizzzzzzzz...

finally i lay ma hands on bullets&octane cd.. cool shite... they sound diff frm other new bands.. they so old skool frm the vocals to the music itself.. well if u like rock and roll or old skool rock.. common buy it... hah.. finally sumthing diff in ma cd collection..

thanks goes to ma switheart for accompany me to the bloody doc all the way frm boon lay.. that is so sweet of him...*hugs*... and oh yeah.. he love bullets and octane album too.. surprise..surprise.. haha...

i feel so hungry as it been few daes since i ate a proper meal... all i ate for todae is a bowl of disgusting porridge which dearest ask me to eat.. blueak... dun noe how i can even ate i/3 of that.. ewww... haha... but later on i had a nice cup of hot chocolate with marshmellow..nyumnyum..

finally i got myspace.... SO ADD ME OK.... i dun even noe how to use it.. hahaha.. it seem abit complicated to me.. i dun even noe how to put comments at ppl profile.. im such a lOSER... oh nvm..

and hope that the haze in kl will go away soon.. me and dearest reali need the trip.. we need to get away and haf our own tyme together.. and it been mths we plan this trip.. haizzz..:(

ok i wana go rest ma freaking heavy head now.. gona drop down any time..

2005-08-08T22:52:00.000-07:00

...*Poetically pathetic*...

HAppy fucking 4oth berfade singapore.. i noe im such a fucking assholes for a citizen but watever...

feeling like shite now and dun noe if i can survived later at werk..

i really think im pushing myself too hard... i think im gona quit soon and find sumthing that i loves without sucking up all ma pathetic energy frm ma pathetic body... im so damn dead tired...

Went to watch the fireworks at the firewerk carnival at marina bay.. fireworks.. it haf always been beautiful.. so beautiful.. that i fall for it..

thanks for the beautiful nite dear.. sorie for the screwing up...

u such a dear and haf always been.. heart u so much...

i reali feeli like coping myself up in ma room todae and not guin aniwhere.. cause i feel like shite..

falling sick so often till im so immune to it...

this world.. its beautiful.. but why cant human make it more perfect?

i miss guin outing with ma family...

ma baby bro gona turn 8 soon and he no longer the cute cuddly baby i knew.. he turn into a monster lately but i still adore him... what shd i get for him.. any ideas for a 8 yr old monster who haf everything in his playroom... x box,gameboy,comp of his own,toys and loads of it....what shd i get for him NOW.. haizz...

nvm.... gona haf a long weeknds soon.. and not to mention the trip i cant wait for... :)

haf a nice holiday.. so long suckas......

2005-08-04T21:55:00.000-07:00

.......*Young & aspiring*........

I loved the title of that underoath song.. haizz...

im so tired rite now.. tired of duin everything in one time..

friends,WERK,boyfirend,family and ma interest.. WAH SIBEI.. im feeling so superwoman now..

i bought the new boys night out cd and they so ermm EMO?... hah... nice though......

and i cant wait to lay ma hands on ataris new cd.. be out in jan/feb.. GOODNESS.. i cant fucking wait... the title of the album*welcome to the night*...

surely emo fuck want.. oh man... i just cant wait.. wohoo..

i remember asking ma dearest to open an account for me on my space so i can hear bands songs or singles but oh well until now im still accountless.. haizzz.... heh...

oh yeah.. if u wana hear sum of ataris new singles just visit the ataris website on myspace.. keep a lookout guys... :)

i miss guin school and haf fun... schools on weekdaes,gigs on weeknds.. no werk fuck .. HAHA.. haizzzz.....

ok im being such a whiny ass now... cant wait though to go on a HOLIDAY with dearest...

im so tired werking day in and out... he's being diff lately.. maybe it just me... im to whiny i guess.. oh well...

i miss ma dearesterest bestfren and he's out todae.. WOHOO.. sun gona be a blast as i guess it will be a small gathering for us.. hope all can make it.. i drag faliq and khai along..

ohh how i miss the kids.....

but for real i miss ma bestest fren for 7 yrs.. he still sad at me for forgetting his berfdae.. until now... no msg or phonecalls like it used to be.. i wish i can undo wat i did and haf him all the way.. i noe it selfish to keep him for myself.. but u cant blame me.. growing up with him.. he haf always been the good loving big brother.. always pampering me and stuff.. always come to ma rescue whenever i need him.. oh why must everyhting fucking change?? i miss riding with him at nite and looking at stars and the yummy supper..... we wld talk about our future and funni ideas and ambitions... coming too close by NUFAN haf always been our song.. we wld sing that song so loud until the neighbours complain. hah.. i miss those daes.. wen i didnt go skul and sneak into his houz and his mum cook the nicest spaghetti.. hahhah... haizzzz.... he more than a best fren... even a brother is too little to describe him..

we always agree on him becoming the doc and me the nurse so we can werk 2gather everidae..

how silly is that?? yeah it's rather silly but it dont sound silly to me.. i wish it could happen.. it so sad and painful wen u noe u losing ur bestfren dae by dae... it's more painful wen u respect and love him so much... fuck it.. ahhhhhh..

ok im done....

oh well... sumtimes i do hate living this life.. i just couldnt accept changes..

and stilll does...

i just wana be a kid and nvr grows up... u noe.. at this stage i cant even accept all this fucking facts.. wonder how im gona face the rest of ma journey in future to come.. DAMN IT... im such a loser..

at this point of tyme.. i always wnat to run and hug ma dad to sleep.. i miss those daes wen he put us to sleep.. he wld kiss us on our foreheads and tell us how much he loved us...

it's nice being a kid without having any needs to worry about shitty stuff..

ok i haf to stop whinning.. ARHH fucking job.. im gona be late.. fuck it.. oh well looking forward to this weeknds though.. :)

"Coming Too Close"

There was a time when you would come and go

Now there's no time left to react

Just as it starts to heal in comes a bitter end

Well you were already to leave my side and then...

You're coming too close and I can't pretend

That I'll pick you up or let you come in again

We've been through this before, so please understand

That nothing in this heart can save you from the pain you seek

If you pick up the phone please don't call on me

No one can save you from the undertow

Nobody can blame you for the past

Just as I started thinking "Everything's alright"

You showed us surely that your tenth time was your last

You're coming too close and I can't pretend

That I'll pick you up or let you come in again

We've been through this before, so please understand

That nothing in this heart can save you from the pain you seek

If you pick up the phone please don't call on me

Yesterday I saw you falling to the ground

Seems like things get worse when no one is around

It's not OK

You're coming too close and I can't pretend

That I'll pick you up or let you come in again

We've been through this before, so please understand

That nothing in this heart can save you from the pain you seek

If you pick up the phone please don't call on me

2005-08-02T04:22:00.000-07:00

......NUMB.....

CONGRATS to me who break ma werking hrs record of 15 hrs.. YAR SIA.. i work for 15 hrs.. balrdi hell.. but hey... im continung frm midnite OKEY...... fuck... i feel like fainting... knock against the wall wen im walking.. that means im super stoned..

oh well... i feel super lertargic now.. be werking again later and luckily fir will be with me.. plus the guys.. HAH....

yesterdae nite a cute guy ask me..... why do singapore produced loads of cute gals like u?? WOW... i ego for a while.. hahha.. ok im bored.. fuck this werk.. oh yar i can go 13 august gig.. wohoo... i realised we full timers can claim an off dae for public holidaes and 13 august fall on the week of national DAY.. YEAYNESS man.. hah...

dad nag non stop frm just now.. he ask me go sleep.. hah.. he scared his precious daughter weill faint.. :)

and for gigs pics st big merchant on last sat..... pls go to ma dearest lesbian partner blog... just click on MON.. she spastic btw.. MUAHAHHAHAA... ok i loved her.. blueak...

come down to full moon beach bar tis sun if u're free.. for 10 bux with free drinks.. u get to see no direction(come down if u tweet fans..heh),dyna turmoil,STRAYVOICE(oh yeah), love at first fight(stupid name) and sumore i 4got.. ok im such a cool gerl.... if those bands dun entertain u well enuff... come down and see me instead cause im cool.. provided u are tall fair and haf preety hair.. ok ma bf gona kill me but he noe i love him.. :) haizz boredom makes me insane.. ok go...

2005-07-30T21:27:00.000-07:00

.....* Take me away*....

yesterdae gig at merchants was more to frens thingy than the whole thingy... i guess if bands do not haf loads of frens.. i cant imagine wat wld happen to them if stuff like yesterdae happen.. HAH... it was fun though...

even though ma dearest bestfren was not there... he was greatly missed..... it's a rare sight for me to see no direction without ma dearest tweet.. HAH.. but oh well.. guess nxt week he will be playing at sum bar.. so yeah come down and watch ma baldy fren playing.. HAH..

yesterdae i just realised... i still haf ppl who love me more than i thgt.. HAH.. oh well.. ;)

and onli now did i noe who ma true frens are.... alot of ppl haf been asking ma frens why they keep tolerating ma irritating and fucking brat behaviour? guys shd be more aggressive and not tolerate mine kinda of behaviour.. but u noe wat ma dearest frens always ans... they just smile without saying anything.. i knew they loved me.. HAH.. boo to u kepo..

i think those who been tolerating with me enuff are ma dearest bubu of course.. he always there for me.. ma titi alif.. even though i always bully him.. he always listen... HAH.... faliq ma bro whom i miss these few daes as we seem busi enuff to see mit up.. i miss him so much.. miss his warm hugs and sweet words wen im down... and lastly not to forget ma DEAREST FIR....

ppl alwys thgt he ma bf.. im so ok with that cause he such a gd fren and a gd bf for sure.. i wana let him noe i appreciate for what he haf done for me all thse years.. he's one of a kind of fren whom u cant find these few daes.. he always do stuff i ask him to even though he grumble and curse me.. sumtimes i wish he was ma twin bro.. cause we do most stuff together and he such a loving fren i ever had... i loved those who been there for me.. u guys shd noe whom i refering too... eh not guys onli i do haf one great GERLFREN.. that wld be ma bitching and lesbian partner.. she as fun as these guys... too bad we dun haf loads of gerlfrens and always end up with the guys... if not... WOW.. we can go clubbing and go eat *durians* like wat the guys always do WITHOUT us.. blueak... we always left out in the most joyous fun.. assholes u all.. heh..

and who say gerls cant haf fun in red light district too?? MUAHAHAH. ok i think they scared that ppl mite think we are one of them.. LOL.. :)

ok im feeling so friendship dae today... i mean having loads of frens can either be too troublesome or lovely.... it's kinda of sux if u haf to choose which grp u wana hang out at the same tyme but its lovely wen all of them cared for u as much as everione else u knew.. awww.. ma heart melting now... but still i love ma bf.. ok corny...

ok go.. i wana shite and pick him up.. wow.. guys nowdaes shd be blessed to haf gf who even pick them up frm werk.. blueak....

2005-07-27T22:01:00.000-07:00

.......*Save me frm Me*.....

Didnt go to werk 2dae as ma menses cramp are killing me.. and ma blardi cough havent wore off even though it's been 4 daes.. PATHETIC i noe.. but im so prone to fall sick often.. so yeah.. it's normal routine for ma pathetic life...

was i too hrash? was i too demanding? was i too mean? i dun haf a clue.. it seem that im losing it all.. even though how much i love u.. it's seem that... NVM...

i reali miss u....

but i miss myself the most.. being the sweet syikin is FUCKING pathetic.. i miss ma naughty,adventurous,wild ME...

i miss being so hyper active and hanging out late for supper or movies with ma frens.. i miss all that... fuck.. i lose it all not becasue of them but of me.. all becasue i want to be a good gerlfren i end up being a bad fren... FUCK ME.. all along i thgt sum scarifices is worth it.. but sumtimes things dun go along the way u wanted and u end up crawling to bed crying urself to sleep as u lose all ur frens.. ok i dun lose ma frens but im not close and not there for them like i used to be..

why must everything changed for a fucking reason? why cant things stay the way it is...

i feel like crying and hugging ma dad to sleep... i miss those soothting words and loving care.. i dun feel it now.. not frm anione.. cause it just things that they are now.....

i feel so lonely and miserable sumtimes.... no matter how many frens u haf or how many fucking guys are after u... it dosent make u feel any better unless u feel loved by sumone that u reali loved so much... i just want to feel that way... FUCK THIS FEELINGS....

................................................................................................................................

reality... boys night out cd are OUT.. and im super kiasu fans of them to ask hmv for that as they just released the album yesterdae.. MUAHAAHHA....

i mean.. im sick of downloading songs frm these illegal download thingy.. hah.. all i want is a decent album frm ma fav bands... so wat im gona do now is to order the cd frm hmv even though it cost much.. i dun gif a fuck.. so anyone out there wana borrow ma cd... 10 bux for a dae... HAH ;) listening to ataris and amber pacific.. reminds me of the old daes.. wen im stuill a young teenage gerl.... having fuhn and drooling over the cutest vox or basists... go gigs haf fun and dance all nite long...

*being grown up is not half as fun as grwoing up.... these are the best daes of our lives...*

i miss growing up.. being grown up at the age of 20.. life seem more harder and more pathetic than it is... making life decision sux too...

*i miss you and im sori.... i love u and hope u wld be there for me...*

"Gone So Young"

I never dreamt it'd be this way

I lost any chance for me to say

To say that I miss you, say that I love you

Will someone please tell me I'm okay

I wasn't prepared for what's to come

A life made of memories gone so young

And now I'm regretting all I've done

But in your heart you know that I'm with you all along

Wherever you go, I will be waiting

Whenever you call, I will be there

Whatever it takes, I'll make your darkest days so bright

I'm in your heart tonight

I never thought that this could go

And take me away from all I know

And leave me to think I'm on my own

But your love will take me, you were the one......

Who sat through night

You held me tigh

tAnd made sure I'm okay

And I thank you for the love you gave to me

Wherever you go, I will be waiting

Whenever you call, I will be there

Whatever it takes, I'll make your darkest days so bright

I'm in your heart tonight...

Tonight...

Wherever you go,

I will be waiting

Whenever you call, I will be there

Whatever it takes, I'll make your darkest days so bright

Wherever you go, I will be waiting

Whenever you call, I will be there

Whatever it takes, I'll make your darkest days so bright

And if I should fall, I know you're waiting

And if I should call, I know you're there

If ever you cry just know I'm in your heart tonight...

I'm in your heart tonight.

by amber pacific...

2005-07-27T09:52:00.000-07:00

....*sumtimes love do hurt*...

I miss ma bestie.. tweet come home soon.. i need u.. we all need u.. now i cry alone wihtout u... :(

sumtimes i feel like giving up..

if not becasue of i fall for u deeply i wld long haf surrender in this game..

i just need u to be there for me not everidae but just sumtimes.. but that sumtimes is too hard..

i try to understand every little things u haf but did u did that to me??

im trying to make tthings goes well easily and fine for us.. but with only one party duin it.. how can the whole thing survive?? u noe u mean alot to em but again u ignored that..

being ignorant does not help...

but if u cared enuff.. we wld be fine all dae long..

dun u ever think the onli matters that we argue all the tyme is about u so engrossed in ur job and not spending tyme with me?? aprt frm that... do i ever whine about anyhtign else??

sorie if i hurt you......

but like i say.. ppl will onli realised stuff wen they lose it all..

dun wana wish that to happen..:(

*cry off to bed*...

2005-07-24T10:36:00.000-07:00

.... WOWNESS...

i bought me fon... andd everione gona BE JEALOUS AND KILL ME.. HEH.. CASUE ALMOST ALL MAFRENS LOVE THIS FON.. OK.. IM SO HAPPY.. DIDNT THGT THAT I MANAGED TO BOUGHT SUMTHING WHICH I DREAM OF.. :)

NICE riteeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.....

ok go.. im sleepy..and i miss ma dearesterest bf and yar 2dae is bernard berfdae.. HAPPY BERFDAE DUDE.. ;)

and i miss ma bestfren badly.. hope u duin fine there bubu.. we miss u so much.. take care honey... ;)

and i swear im gona kill those two bitches at werk if they dun behave.. giving them face everidae and patiently listen to their fucking grumbling.. just fuck off ok.. i noe im such a grumpy person lately... sorie.. im just feeling vexed at werk.... fuck werk..

ok.. sumone tag me and u are an ugly couple.. he or she forget to type adorable i guess.. haha.. casue we are cute.. boo u damn taggers.. ok nitessssssssssssssss

2005-07-23T22:07:00.000-07:00

...*COld cash and colder hearts*...

Money makes ppl happy andd sad at times.. but 2DAE it's gona amke me a happy person.. MUAHAH... oh well... im gona buy a new fon.. and im guin with ma bitching and lesbian partner.. WOWNESS... not onli we haf the same mind on clothes and stuff but HP too.. MUAHHAHHA.. gawd.. hope kit and tweet wont kill us, for this tyme we gona spend a BOMB on our shopping products.. heh..;)

yesterdae werk was tiring like fuck.. fuck u if u wana cut cost.. for the cutting cost thingy.. u gona lose ur staff as well assy.. who gona werk hard like a slave wen u onli offer them a pathetic amount of 4.50 per hr assy?? GAWD.. i pity those new staff... u noe wat.. 1 300 for a full time staff is nuthing.. ma dad can gif me that amount any tyme.. im not trying to say im fucking rich.. but werking like fuck in a fucked up company and getting a fucked up pay.. mite as well i better off as a spoil brat who get more than wat i earned wen i werk.. fuckers..

ouhh wel... nvm.. im not gona let this spoil ma shopping mood.. im so excited.. i can feel it.. MUAHAHA.. new fon.. who wldn't??.. and dearest wld be back any tyme now.. still waiting for his kols... ;)

oh i just realised i got the same pair of ear stud which kris roe owned... MUAHAHAHHA.. 20 bux for that earrings are nuthing as i wore the same thing as KRIS ROE>. ok craps.. but i heart him.. he ma fucking idol u see.. :)

oh well.. im gona get readi and off to buy ma new fon.. im so fucking excited about this.. and im gona look at brochure for our holidaes.. ;) anione haf good suggestion on cheap cruise pls tag me liao... i cant wait for that dae.. me and you cruising ard.. muacks..

2005-07-22T22:01:00.000-07:00

....*Missing Him*....

Gosh.. 2dae weather is so NICE.... didnt realsie i woke up and it was oredi 1 pm... fuck... i need to be at werk by 2pm.. where haf all ma freedom goes to..:(...

ARh arh... yesterdae was funw erking with alif fir and zad.. we witness the flying toast, a bimbo act and MORE.... does chicken look like egg at all?? i wonder..... MUAHHAHA... and u shd look at that on im miss vegetarian face wen she smel her food and realise that zad just gave her meat... heh...

went to supper after that and slept well last nyte due to the bloated and full stomach... BUT STUPID mee kuah.. so spicy.. now i got terrible stomache.. shit for 3 times liao.. ;)

wokey.. i just cant wait to start school... werking life is terrible.. and i wana go to the new national library.. gona go with kit after he come back.. fir went there and he make me so jealous by saying how good the ambience and the builiding itself look..

GUYS DUN BUY 7610.. that's such a fucking fon.. ok done..

sumtimes seeing ppl fly wearing those classic peach color uniforms and the sweet hat with laces..... im so jealous and feel like shite that i can cry.. casue i just blew it all away by giving up the chances to be just like them.. but ma intention was good.. i just cant bear to leave ma loved ones.. but this is the toughest sacrifices i ever made.. i guess onli ma bf and close freinds noes wat im talking about.. ok go..

*and i miss you.. pls come back soon..* :) i wana go eat at esplanade.. the fried rice.. ;)

2005-07-21T21:03:00.000-07:00

..."Say goodnite, but means goodbye"...

IM so gona miss ma dearest bestie.. he's guin to serve the bloddy nation in ermm 2 hrs tyme?? IM so sorie i cant send u in honey... werk fuck.. thats why.. now i noe what it's feel like to get squeeze btwn werk and ppl that matter most.. FUCK WERK.. but im sure ma dearesterest bestie wld understand ma plight.. im so gona miss whinning at him and kol him at any tyme just to complain to him about stuff.. and he wld patiently entertain this spoil brat bestie of him.. hurhur.... BUT i will wait for the dae wen u finally out no matter how long it takes... than we will haf fun like kids AGAIN.. I HATE ns.... i hate it wen ma dearest ones leaves me.. sorie but im oredy a fucking spoil brat.. ppl that loves me always pamper me again and again.. ouhh how i miss the ite daes wen all were there everidae of our lifes.... but than everione grows up and haf to do sumthing that they HAF to do.. like guin in and serve this bloody nation...

and it dosent make me feel any better as ma dearest bf wld be guin to kl as well todae.. ma life is super pathetic for the dae.. HAH.. no one to tok or chat with me at nite... no one i can complain to for this few daes...

OH WELL.. stop whining syikin.. everything's gona be alrite...

ok im done with whining..

there's still sumthing for em to look forward t0.. a BRAND NEW HP.. heh.. BUT im using 3/4 of ma own money. dad onli contribute 1/4.. so im not considered a poilt fucker now..

suddenly f eel like shiting.. OK GO..

2005-07-20T22:42:00.000-07:00

......*jingle jangle*.....

preety soon im not gona update or maybe worse gona abandon this blog of mine.. MUAHAH.. im so freaking lazi.... wat do u expect frm a gerl who werk 6 daes per week 10 hrs each dae?? so many ppl commen that i lose weight.. trust me.. wen u werk at ma place u dun even haf to sign up for any slimming programme.. HAH.. IM SO IN LOVE WITH *for fiona*

by nufan...i dun noe why but hearing the song just make me feel sum kind of weird feeling.. MUAHAH IM SUCH A NUTCASE... YEAY finally all 3 parts of thrice live concert haf been download.. wahlau waited like 2 weeks sia to finish download.. assy.. NVM.. ;)

bought the vans 2005 warped tour cd which cost 17 bux and haf 50 nice songs inside.. it's funni to hear songs frm unknown bands and unknown genre.. haha... there's this band(goregolllo.....) sumting like that and the title of their song was*start wearing purple*... MUAHAHAHH.. crap sia the song.. not to mention the lyrics.. but i bet mon darling and me wld agree to it tittle since we purple freaks.. HAH.. ;) wokey.. im supposed to start werk at 2 but gosh at 1.50 im still here typing away happily.. FUCK werk.. but hey the $$ are good so i try to survive it until jan.. YEAH IM GONA START SCHOOL AGAIN ON JAN.. woohoo... i cant wait to go sch again... wow... im gona hang ard with cool kids huh?? MUAHAHHHA.. ok ppl will hate me if i start to say that especially ma dearest frens.. nah.. i already haf cool frens to start with.. so im cool.. CRAPS.. arh arh arh.. bored sia.. lazi oso wana go werk... HAIZZZZZZZZZ....

hey im stuck with ma course choices.. shd i take fashion marketing and merchandising at nafa or film productions or photography in la salle... HELP MEEEE.....

i noe ppl wld say "take the fashion course since that what u haf always wanted to do.." but after browsing thru the courses... ma mind went fickle on what to take.. this 3 are ma major interest.. SHITE... CAN I TAKE ALL THREE... plss daddy.. heh.. im gona for the interview soon and hope that i can make it to this 3 courses and frm there i wld gladly choose..

arhhh wana study oso leceh.. ... i was so hyper excited wen i was browsing thru the the courses that i intent to choose and reading thru all the details.. simply i just cant wait to do sumthing which i adore most.. sorie honey... u got such a vainpot as a gf.. MUAHHAHA.. but than again.. ma interest haf always been arts and fashion oh so yeah.. even though daddy always say there's onli a glimpse of future if i major in arts studies.. i wld prove to him that ma futured wld be part of the glimpse out there.. oh YEAH.... ;)

"For Fiona"

I can't even think of words to match the way I'm feeling

I don't even think a book could say enough for you

I can only try my best, to put it in a song I guess

You try to speak, I know you tell the truth

If I could freeze our small amount of time together

Then we could make believe this world would never end

(make believe this world would never end)

Unfortunately truth is cold

So you stay young while I get old

But always know, I'm your best friend

Nothing is the same

Everything is a better change

Sometimes I see silence in your eyes

Let it all crash down

When it ends it begins with you

I'm gonna learn every time you do

And I'm as scared as anybody who has done this

I wouldn't give it up for nothing free

You took my life, turned it around

And put my feet back on the ground

I owe you, eternally

Nothing is the same

Everything is a better change

Sometimes I see silence in your eyes

Let it all crash down

When it ends it begins with you

I'm gonna learn every time you do

I'm always

I'm always here

I'm always

I'm always here

Nothing is the same

Everything is a better change

Sometimes I see silence in your eyes

Let it all crash down

When it ends it begins with you

I'm gonna learn every time you do

(* sorie if im such a weepy bitch.. im so gona miss you so much.. muacks..)

2005-07-18T05:26:00.000-07:00

......AWESOME....

So sad that baybeats end just like that.. HAH but it was total madness and wowness...

it haf always been like that.. wait for it for one whole year and it pass by without u realising it.. HAH.. TOO BAD... ma camera haf to went dead on the 3rd dae.. GOSH I BOUGHT COPELAND and kate of kale tee... ;)

IRIONIC oh YEAH cause im not reali into copeland that MUCH except THEIR VOCALIST who's so CUTE and who haf fucking awesome voice..

but HEY we shd give them support back since they came all the way to this sucky place and perform for US..

HAD fun with ppl that matter most... too bad he miss the 2nd dae which is of course THE WOWNES of the show.. and YAR. i fall in love with this band frm thailand.. didnt heard of them b4 and thgt how good can this thailand be.. BUT HEYYYYYYY... the band was fucking COOL... i was so into it that i didnt realsied i moved far away frm am frens and all alone.. BRAND NEW SUNSET... u rox ma socks... i freaking swear im gona get their album.. but its quite amusing cause they are HEAVY and still perform in baybeats.. so why cant singapore BANDS huh??Onli than it wld be totally RAD.. WOHOO.... hah...

i guess i enjoy branston and BRAND new sunset SET the most.. wohoo.. u guys rock ma socks...

pictures will be up soon.. as soon as ma comp behaves.. (SUCKERS).. but i onli get to take BRAND NEW SUNSET set the most.. gawd u guys rocks..

i guess now onli can i say serenaide rox.. haha.. ermm oh well actuali i prefer the violinist than the whole serenaide thingy.. MUAHAHAH... admit the violinist was good and with the addition of keyboard too i guess they wont b so boring like they used too.. SORIE HONEY.. but oh yeah.. ;) thanks mon and bubu dearest for the fun compnaion all along.. how im gona miss ma dear bubu wen he go serve the nation in 5 daes time.. no worries about ur gf.. she ma lesbian partner so we wld rock each other life... MUAHAHAH... ;)

and yar.. werk as tiring as ever.. and i guess fri schd wld be the THE BEST SHCD i ever had.. gona werk with 3 guys whom happen to be ma FRENS.. gona werk with fir,alif and zad.. HAHA.. with me in charge GOSH.. i guess o briens gona suffer a downfall..;)

ok im so beat.. so long...

* im gona miss yar stinky ;).. the pics that u developed for me was so nice that im proud to hang it on ma wall. heh..*

*pics taken with BRAND NEW SUNSET VOX..*

*With copeland vox *

* the grp pics*

*lastly.. US..*

2005-07-15T22:51:00.000-07:00

"The love that haf nvr been shown"

I admit im such a FUCKING BAD daughter.... but than again u shd be blame too MUM.. Sumtimes u make ma life MISERABLE.. i fucking swear.. FINE.. u gave me everything that sumtimes no mum can give.. expensive gifts,expensive clothes,expensive food..

u also gave me freedom to do what i want and choose who i wana be with but again... FOR WHAT?? all i need is ur blardi sweet love and concern .. u nvr show that to me.... u always scream shout or accused me.. if not for dad.. i swear i wld haf leave the houz and live with aunt like what she offer.. PEEPS.. MONEY IS NOT HAPPINESS at all.. money sux like fuck... they can be used to buy happiness which lasted onli a few secs.. while real happiness is hard to fade.. arhh.. wat a dae to start with.. i was so happy looking forward to enjoy myself and go baybeats and this haf to blardi happen.. im still trying hard to be a good daughter not the spoil brat that u haf raised all this yr.. if onli one dae u show me how much u loved me mum... i wont mind we living in poor and fucking ugly condition.. as long as i can feel mum true loved...

and im sorie i alwys make u cry.. but u always hurt me so much that i feel that i dun wana live with u ever again.. but deep down i swear i love u.. u ma mum after all..

2005-07-15T06:37:00.000-07:00

"LIVE,LOVE,BURN,DIE"

I'm feeling bloody GRUMPY now and anione wnaa join me burn the fucking nokia center down?? A*HOLES....

1st.. they ask em to come collect ma fon 3 daes after that dea.. went there and waited for fucking hrs before getting the news that ma fon still in icu and cant go home that dae.. fuck.. make us fucking wait and that all we got.. and they say they will kol me as to wen to pick up that blardi fon..... fuck.. 3 wks gone and no calls from the fucking center.. went there and suddenly they say.. "ouhh ur fon is ready for collection".. DAMN it.. kit.. i shd let u lodge a complain instead of being sos weet.. damn it... than now.. i realised they STOLE MA BATT AND MEMORY CARD... ok not literraly as stealing but they didnt gave back that two bloody important things to me.. how can i start ma fon without THE BATT FUCKER and ma fon need a memory card.. damn it...

and now i dun think i haf the fucking energy to go there and fite with them over the fucking pathetic batt and memory card which will cost a bomb to start with.. A*HOLES..

shucks... now i need to buy new batt and GAWD A FUCKING EXPENSIVE MEMORY CARD>> ARHHHHHHH... anione wana donate this poor sweet gerl a 7610 nokia memory card? PLSSSSSSS.. preeti plsss... dun mid the amoutn of bytes.. i just need a fucking MEMORY CARD to start with.. ARHHHHHHHHH...

ok im done.. lesson to be learn.. beauty indeed is painful... as in.. u need to go thru loads of surgery or watever fucking things they need to screw ur face in order to maintain ur so called beauty... just like ma fucking fon.. the fucking accesories needed are expensive( and that hurt me) and they are sensitive and fall sick easily if u neglected them or even drop them gently.. ANUS.. stupid fon.. why dad buy me that blardi fon in the 1st plc.. shd just get me a blardi LAPTOP.. ARH.. ARH....

now i lie to am sis and ask her to surrender her memory card and batt so that i can used.. muahah.. arhh.. she still a kid.. no need to used expensive fonss... 3315 will be just fine for her.. let her taste how its like to be using that fucking fon for quite a period.. mom bought the new ericsson fon.. k500 or sumthing like that.. suxkers... always nag us to be thrifty and dun be matarialistic while she in the other hand bought sumthing so exclusive and NEW wen she dun even PASS at sending msg correctly.. she always do stupid stuff while sending sms.. nuthead but i heart her.. :) oh yeah.. o'briens are the new in thing to werk at... DIMBULLAH is so last summer.. hah.. hiring one more peep... zad the man will be next to join in the family... gosh.. they shd be fucking thankful as not to go interviews and sweat during the session.. all they need is to fill in sum stupid forms and BOOM.. theyu can start as soon as 3 daes time.. oh well easy say.. im lazi to conduct the interview.. heh.. frens mah... haizzz...

ok BABYBEATS is here and i cant wait for sata nd sun.. its gona be a blast.. i always haf this tinge of excitement everytime babybeats landed.. MUAHAHAH.. CUTE EMO GUYS ARE HERE DUDES..oh well.. maybe i shd say.. INDIE and rude boys are gona float the streets.. suckers.. HEH.. IRONY OF LIFE.. ;)

oh well.. just now make frens with this cute emo/hardcore angmoh who came specially for BAYBEATS AS TO SEE COPELAND.. hah.. gosh.. he so cute i swear u gerls wld melt.. with his specs,cute hair,and BLARDI NICE VANS SHOES.. who wouldnt???

but again.. so sorie to reject his offer of being the host in singapore..but than i think he just flirting.. since he hanging out with singapore kids.. DUN BLARDI LIE U DUN NOE SINGAPORE AT ALL MISTER... ;) im not trying to say i stop being a flirt and am a good gerl now.. BUT IM TRYING AND IM PROUD OF THAT.. cause im so into this cute guy who keep saying he ugly wen he's not.. heart him so damn much..

if onli singapore are rich enuff to fly in THE ATARIS......

i wld be the 1st to arrive and last to live... it wld be nice if he catch ma undies.. HAH.. that so

bimbotic but wat can i say.. i wld do anything FOR MA IDOL.. KRIS ROE....wowowowow...

HOW WONDERFUL it is if he playing acoustic.. " i kol u frm paris...." that song just make me wana fall in love again and again.. hah.. thats part of the lyrics too.. :0

ok the bed kolling me.. so long.............

* did i tell yar i paint ma nails again.. this tyme it haf cute cherries aon the damn black base.. WOWNESS... so preeti ma nails.. ok EGO MAU LEBIH..

2005-07-14T10:48:00.000-07:00

....* MIZ ma bestfren, ma switheart*...

Ok i was such a whinny bicth in the previous post.. oh well sori sweets if i hurt yar but what u feel u haf to let it out rite?.. oh well werking in the morning shift 2morow an dim still wide awake.. prolly to 5 hrs of sleep in the afternuun just now the moment i got back.. i dun feel sleepy at all.. oh gawd.. o'briens is the in thing now to werk at.. i just drag 2 of ma bestest frens to werk with me.. cool shite.. now i got 2 lovely guys to layan me.. im sick of the gerls there.. all they do is bitching ard.. stupid fat ass gerls.. hah.. but than gain i am one.. the irony of life.. damn it.. if onli bubu need not go ns i wld haf drag hima long too.. how funcore wld it be?? HAH...

i dun haf anythign against gerls.. BUT CAN U GERLS PLS STOP BEING so intimidated by other preety gerls ard u and all u gerls ever do is to bicth ard about them before even knowing how they like?? WATCH THAT UGLY MOUTH ma dear gerls.. haha.. thats what happening ard at ma werk plc.. a bnew preeti gerl enters and the rests tart to bully and bicth about them.. GAWD.. get a life.. i werk there for like almost 3 yrs and haf nvr been intimadated by any gerls before.. casue i got feelings unlike those inhuman bitch.. haha.. all i can do now is to listen to their bitching which i drag the most.. haha.. why cant they tok about the cutest basists alive or maybe the cutest keyboardist ever that's gona come over singapore... (OH YEAH BRAVERY GONA BE IN TOWN AND I LUV THE KEYBOARDIST).. haizz.. nvm...

oh well.. been feeling preeti strange lately... last tyme i used to whine about not having a bf and all i do is spent slacking ard with the peeps or with ma bestfresn and stuff... i always complain i need sum changes cause im getting sick of slacking ard and all they do is to tok about gerls.. hah.. but than noe.. suddenly.. i miss the late nights hang otu supper and stuff.. hah.. werk made me go bonkers but i need that to satisfy ma boredom..

i reali miss faliq tweet fir(even though he's werking with me) the four of us always rock the world upside down.. oh well we shd gather ard befre dearest tweet go serve the nation.. haizzz..

ok im gona sleep now before i cant wake up again...

and to am DEAREST FREN.. fazalan.. sorie i forget ur berdaes after all this yrs.. pls dun ignored me.. u still ma bestest fren ever.. u haf always been supportive of me in everyhting i do.. but not having u now to share ma happiness.. it sadden me rather than being happy...

i miss our late nite toks and gossipping.. i mis ur loved care and concern.. its true things are not gona be the same again as we two haf others to take care of and they are indeed special.. but than again.. u are special forever in ma eyes.. u are the fren, the brother that i nvr thgt i had..

i admit i love u ma dear fren.. pls pls.. dun be mad at me.. reply ma msgs and kols back will u?? mummy not gona be happy knowing this.. hah.. not threatening.. just ermmmm gentle reminder frm ur spoli brat FREN.. haizz miss u.....

2005-07-14T07:48:00.000-07:00

...* Y do u even care*...

1stly.. sorie to those kl freaks who beenw aiting for me to upload ma pics.. sorie to say tehre sumthing wrong with ma comp and i cant seem to find the lost files which consists of our pics.. but hey.. all the pics i haf.. mon and zak haf it too.. and sumore ma batt was low.. JADI SEGELINTIR SAHAJA gambar yg diambil.. HAHA MELAYU BOLEH... haizz.. miss the fun there.. the stupid werds we learn, the stupid jokes about BLOODY M's.... and so much more.. there be next tyme.. i can see that.... y do i even care about guin home early to see u?? i shd just stay there longer and enjoy myself.. thanks for making me trying so hard to be a selfish ass.. casue u are one.. i understand ur werk plight but sumtimes i just cant take it.. i mean. U'RE not even werking for REAL man.. and u haf to bloody ignored me for that.. wonder what's gona happen in theh futured.. maybe u wont even remembered how ur GF LOOK LIKE.. WOWNESS.. not STANDING up for myself but HEY...i werk much more longer hrs than u but still i always haf tyme for everione.. u ma frens or family.. BUT... arh.. dun wana gif a damn bout it no more.. gona start on ma full time shift soon and maybe u gona JUMP with joy as i wont even haf tyme to blardi think about not miting u..sorie... cant take it...

and yar.. fir and alif are werking at ma place.. maybe i enjoy werking MORE now than WAITING to mit sumone.. maybe i shd just WERK everi single hrs so i wont haf tyme even to kol yar.. hah.. selfish, pathetic.. i am.. thanks for making me one.. sumtimes it so hard just to ask sumthing that is so simple.... fuck it.. oh well im so feeling like shite now.. ok.. so long.....

2005-07-12T23:01:00.000-07:00

....KL IS THE RAD...

Its was all pure fun... having sum time away frm home and travelling with just ur frens no parents no guidance to guide us.. THAT was the rad.. learn all sorts of fucking hilarrious new words and stuff... seriously ma malay is so fucking bad i wonder how i get good grades for that.. hah... i dun even understand sum of the malay werds that the malaysian use.. heh..

SEMPOI will be our new found glory.. HAHH sempoi means cool i gues.. that what zad told us..

oh well with peeps like tweet,mon,alif,ayu,fir,zad,zakand yazid.. it was pure fun... but too bad mon and tweet haf to go off early and yeah i mess up their plans i guess... oh well im still sorie for what happen and i hope i can make it up.. i love u guys so much.. im so sorie..

OH well i think im the biggest shopping freak ever.. went bankrupt onli on the 1st dae itself.. HAH... im such a shopping freak.. fuck ma freakness... hah..

pictures will be up soon.. soon.. is the word that everione hate me.. it mite take mths but heh trust me it will be soon..

i miss HIM so badly.. how cool if he's there with us but oh well..

and im gona miss maggi goreng in malaysia casue they cook the nicest maggie goreng ever...

and zak will always be ma fav bargain auntie and fav act thru out kl.. u the man.. si zak yg sempoi.. olehhh...

2005-07-04T10:53:00.000-07:00

*Everything's gona be alrite*

Nuthing else is nicer than being in love.. but than again.. the upcomings of heartbreak and painful fights are sumthing that we cant escape no matter what.. but im sure we go thru that..

thanks for being there always and try to spend more tyme with me even though i noe its tough as u urself alwys find it hard to get off from werk.. how i wish sumtimes that u wld just blardi hell quite ur ugly job.. ;)

seeing ur smiles and hear ur stupid lame jokes just make ma dae... <3>

there was once wher i thgt for GIVING up of trying hard to make things werk for us.. there was a tyme where u let me feel that im worthless and means nuthing.. sorie if im asuming but again.. u MAKE it seem so real..

Can't wait for kl and yeah lets shop till we drop...

2005-06-30T02:43:00.000-07:00

......A'int love grand....

29/jun/05

A new chapter begin and it's time to say goodbye to the old PAST.....

A new life been included and it's time to be wise and stand up on ma own again to face decision which involved 2 hearts... And watever i do or decide there will always be another sumone i need to seek too.. that's such a wonderful feeling which haf long gone and onli gain it back now..:)

Thanks for believeing in me and let me start over a new life with you..

no words can describe how i feel now.. :) <3>

..........................................................................................................................................................

Faizal got terminated cause of sum issues which sux big tyme.. i just lose a great werking companion.. we been werking together for almost 3 yrs... and i swer i miss himm like FUCK...

Miss the great tymes we haf together and the stuff to tok about during werk.. even though he's a guy.. i swear he's a gd gossip partner and a gd adviser... nvr fails to make us happy during werk or wen we having fun hanging out... why must i lose a grt fren one after another.. ok i noe we can always mit up but than its not gona be the same as we use to see each other almost everidae at werk.. i SWEAR im gona cry... i miss the grown up kids clan... the onli one that im close to is mel.. cause we always werking in the same shift.. sally.. busi with werk and school.. final yr in poly must be shite i guess.. fazlan and yan.. both busi with their grown up routines.. gerlfriends and ns drift them away frm us.. and i swear its been a long tyme since i haf a reali proper hang out with yan and fazlan.. i MISS THEM LIKE HELL.. ;( wen are we goin to cruise again ard at nite.. guin nowhere.. go for supper.. midnite movies... and the fun we haf while crusing ard.. HAIZZZZZZZZZ......maybe its ma fault.. i been neglecting ma bestie i guess.. but again.... ouhh ok nvm...

i hope we meet up again soon..

and i noe faizal deserve much more better respect and job opportunities out there.. u're a great guy and sumone who can reali werk.. so sorie to haf a balrdi bitch in the new team.. i miss you buddy..

*D werking buddy which i can nvr replaced..<3*

2005-06-27T08:40:00.000-07:00

....i'm gona be a racer wen i grow up..

Hah.. nothing new.... INITIAL D was superb.. The most enjoyed movie in ma entire 19 yrs... GOODNESS... even though it last for 2 hrs i guess it's pretti short.. heh... pretti short to drool MORE on those hunkies.. even though how cute and adorable jay chou is....i must admit.. his acting was not that GOOD... i guess edison chen still kept that title... ;) but who cares... seeing jay chou is enuff to make me drool... WOWNESS.... gosh.. i swear im gona buy the dvd and keep playing it.. hah.. the last tyme i go crazee over a movie and watch it dozens of tymes was TROY.. heh.. look at BRADD muscle.. ok kidding.. haha.. i guess the anciet story reali make me addicted to watch it over and over again as u can see im a FREAK for that kinda of movie..

get pay and shopping is the onli answer... change ma hair color AGAIN.. and this tyme a cute emo stylish chinese guy cut ma hair.. CUTENESS... but jay chou still rocks... ok i noe i sux.. nitez...

2005-06-24T00:31:00.000-07:00

....It's a NEW day....

Change schd with ma mates and im free 2dae... but will be werking 2morow morning.. can i wake up on time? *wonders*.. be miting peeps later on...

i miss MIDNITE MOVIES and slacking session till the wee hours.. seriously.. hahah.. it's been a while i went back home ard 3 or 4 am in the morning like last tyme.. haizzz...

wonder how im gona haf kids on ma own.. the chubby baby frm next door come again todae and she keep vomiting on ma hands... i noe baby vomits dosent smell bad at all but i dun noe.. i just feel like puking seeing that.. HAIZZZ... haha...

mummy gave her oreo cake and she look so HAPPY eating that.. ah... CUTENESS...

ma back ache like hell and i badly need a massage...

INITIAL D is out but i yet to watch it.. waiting for sumone who always defer the dates.. HEH...

suddenly i feel good.. i feel better 2dae than the past few daes.. HAH.. maybe i managed to calm myself down.... seriously being angry or mad at sumone is VERY BAD.. it can lead to anger and suffering.. haha tweet dearest teach me all that.. <3 align="left">nxt week schd gona sucks big tyme as faizal haf to go reservist and im so gona miss werking with him.. he the onli ONE whom i can werk and communicate with SO EASILY.. werking 2gather for nearly 3 years explain all that...

miss ma faz and yan... all busi with ns.. yan busi with his stupid ndp stuff.. wow.. MUM gona be proud of yar.. ;)

im VERY HUNGRY NOW and mum taking her own sweet tyme cutting all the ingredients.. WEN SHE GONA START COOKING SIA..... haizzz..

im not gona complain cause she will end up making me do the stupid house werk.. so lets suffer in silence... haizzz..

Gona take a long break frm werk on the 8th of july till 17... kl,baybeats adn maybe australia are all here for grabs.. HAH.. up to me now to haf a rolling good time...

and i yet to REPLY to them.. cause im making a decision which involve OTHERS.. haizzz.. ;(

2005-06-22T01:21:00.000-07:00

...* A night that worth a million bucks*...

I still cant believe i get to see jay chou, edison chen and shawn yue LIVE.. in real person.. gosh smack ma head and wake me up..and it seems that me and ma sis are the onli NON chinese FANS among the thousands waiting... but WTH... i told sis if anione ask just say our mum CHINESE... haah...the waiting kinda sucks though.. one star arrive and the enxt one wil onli arrive 30 mins later.. imagine how long we nee to withstand the heat, the screaming and WORSE.. pardon me but teenage chinese gerls shd take care of their body.. THEY STINKS LIKE HELL wen sweating.. i BLARDI swear.. ;)

Edison look like sum preeti MIDGET which i loathe.. haha acsue he just popular casue of his blardi gerls LOOK... but oh well his ok.. shawn YUE steal our eyes.. HE WAS SO charming weraing this checker trench coat with his goatie and stylish hairstyle.. GOD.. no wonder ma sis fall HEAD over heels with him... and the other actor.. jordan chang i think the name.. he look like a GAY weraing silver sleeveless and tight leather pants. HAAH but he's a gd actor among all though... BUT like ppl always say.. save the BEST for the last.. JAY CHOU was absolutely breathe taking..... GOSH.. he's tall,lean,cute,blur,stylish.. GOSH... i cant belief at that point he jusr infront of me.. u noe wat.. at this point of tyme... i wish i own a camera like IKAY... FUCK.. no matter how near theya re.. but ppl pushing and all those hands make me difficult to snap a proper SHOT of their cute faces...... i get to snap jay chou frm the back onli.. and i get to snap edison botak head cause this blardi ah beng gto push ma hand accidentaly but still he sucks.. :(

overall.. IT'S worth getting pushed,sweat like hell,those unbearable smell and those stupid presenter yaking in chinese.. lucky ma sis understand chinese so well and translte it back to me..

and i haf to thank her for letting me step onto her legs all the while.. HAHA...

overall im not a crazee fanatic chinese starss FAN.. it just that i haf nvr been to any red carpet thingy so thats explain our enthuatism.. i think apart frm this the other red carpet was wen THE INDIANS BOLLYWOOD stars came.. oh well nvm about thta.. im not a hindustand freak aniwae.. hah.. and lucky im werking with dear faizal that nite.. guess what?? we onli clean the whole store for 2 HRS and we were resting as early as 2 am.. slack and eat and talk all the way.. GOSH... im so gona miss HIM if he quits.. i mean we two are the onli ones who noe each other way of werking andf we adapt so well to it that we can finish any task at the minimum time given... and that fucking GERL are getting on manerves badly.. i swear i wld snap at her if she ever make those coments AGAIn..

2005-06-20T10:24:00.000-07:00

...*Being nice sumtimes wont hurt or harm us*..

Well dun feel that good 2dae.. but hey.. a drawing frm mon makes ma dae... <3.

but no worries.. we still adores cute guys though...

i REALI dun understand wat exactly i feel now..

its not that imbeing difficult or stuff... it just that the way things are.. onli IDIOTS wont feel that way.. try to make things werk out and wat its like to be wen we 1st met.. but oh well. nvm.. wat the heck am i writing all this shite for.. no one will understand.. no one will noe.. no one can help.. no one will ever give a shite.. im sick of whining and all but no one or rather HE will nvr noe..

Being sumone whom ppl take for granted is.. REALI sucks...

i noe where i stand and some dae i mite just vanish and i guess that's wen ppl wld think wat u mean to them.. or maybe NONE too..

aniwaes... watch BATMAN BEGINS with the the ma other 3..(faliq,fir and tweet) for me.. the show reali dun leave any impact on me.. it's freaking long too.. but at the last 30 mins or so.. was a BLAST.. onli that... and trust me.. if u haf the vcd.. just turn on the 2nd disc.. forget about the 1st cd casue for 1 hr and so.. it's all RAMBLING AND STUFF about overcoming ur FEARS... BORING...

y can't things be the way they are BEFORE ;(

oh wel.. so long and nites....

2005-06-19T00:38:00.000-07:00

...*You used to live in a memory*...

Tired,sleepy,shag.. haizz... so lazi wana go werk liao.. these few daes i haf this BLARDI habit of sleeping ard 4 or 5 plus in the morning and wake up veri early.. DAMN it.. the dark circle are getting DARKER and hideous.. HAIZZ..

Yesterdae was FUN.. FUNcore... it's been a while..

and OMG.. we found out DZAFIR hideous secret ever.. hah.. sakit eh.. kesian.. ;)

pics haf been uploaded but it gona take a few daes before i add it into ma pics gallery... LAZI..

did sum woneders on ma hair AGAINNN..... MUM.... i guess she finally noes that her daughter is ONE HELL of a HAIR freak.. so she didint nag as usual.. HAH.. ;)

I pity this gerl frm ma werk plc.. she trying so HARD to be me... YAR.. ME.. WTH??

and she out there trying to make everione against me.. haha.. common lah.. do i even care?? do i even WHINE about ma pay rise?? haha pity u cause u need to bootlick and do stupid stuff before u get that pathetic 50 cents rise.. hahah.. i haf NVR whine or ASK or bootlick to get ma 2 bux pay rise.. HAH.. stupid gerl.. And yar.. i dun abuse ma SENIOR post and brag ard.. and u stupid gerl who haf ben ard for 3 mths wana boost ard wen u stupid lembab gerl, did all the learning frm me.. BOO...

haha its funni sumtimes..

oh well... its me.. i dun reali think much about stupid ppl who get JEALOUS about every stupid little stuff..

ok im bored.. tried.. and i BLARDI lazie to get dress and off to werk.. ;(

2005-06-17T13:15:00.000-07:00

**let's BAN fear factor**

it's 4 am and im stilll emoing ard the comp.. Can't sleep.. thanx to ma chatting buddy now for making me crack up in the wee hours.. u rock dude.. and thanx for telling me that we are SHIT buddies now.. WOW im amazed..

supposed to be werking at 7am todae but being the plain lazi syikin.. i got nuthing else to say..

Oh yar.. ma title.. damn.. mummy cook ma fav dish.. ermm dun noe how to translate it in eng.. those spicy red gravy fish thingy .... and yar.. thgt of eating it after i reach home but blardi hell all i found was this two big fish head.. as hungry overcome me, just scoop it up and hell yar went to the living room and turn on the tv... and YAR thanx FEAR factor for making me throw back the fish head after watching how gross they ate the BLARDI fish eyes.. i swear i was on the verge of puking but there's nuthign in ma stomach at that moment so it didnt reali came out.. GROSS.. i noe..

oh well.. had ma fon repair and im just gona wait for 3 daes before i get ma blardi irritaing but GLAMOUR fon.. haha trust me.. i use that fon for GLAMOUR.. HAH...

thgt i was the onli one using an old skool fon b4 getting ma glamour fon back.. but seeing zad fon.. guess im better off.. sorie dude.. hah..

2morow will be another date with ma lesbian partner.. and MONNNNNNN.. im not guin to go out with u wen im broke.. i blardi swear cause i end up spending the MOST.. ;(

i think it's been a while i update sum serious happy shite about me..

8th july.. it's fucking confirm.. and we the kids wld finally sail to kl... and MA LESBIAN partner will be there too.. wowness.. ahaha...

and it's more freaking cool to stay in a 5 star hotel by just paying 7 bux each.. i love alif dad.. opss.. i mean ur dad.. oh watvever.. ;)

ma manager say sumthing sweet to the others about me and im flatter.. no wonder ppl thgt im his MISTRESS.. damn it.. if his couzin.. i wldn't MIND ;)

im gona find full time job soon.. dun be surprised if i scarifice myself to ma couzin BLARDI BORING OFFICE JOB OFFER.. i noe.. im such a hyporcrite but unless u can find me a decent full time job.. that's the last resort DUDES...

got loads uploading PICS to do but im way lazi than usual..

so sorie if u waiting for ur pics but gif me another1 wk pls... im so lazy to even type shutterfly.com.. EH.. i did.. ^-^

ok its 4.30 now and seriously i better get sum sleep before i go BONKERS.. but WTH.. im oredi AM guin NUTS..

suddenly... i MISS HIM..

haizz... does he even noe it?? does he even feel it?? BOO...

and ayu.. i PROMISED i drop by one dae to see u ma r2-d2.. aku selalu turun KAU TAK DA.. or are u hidden by the tall TABLES and stuff?? HAH.. kidding.. ok go...

2005-06-16T00:21:00.000-07:00

.....All i wan do is to haf sum FUN....

ANIONE whose kind enuff to buy me a new fon?? ma fon is behaving like sum FUCKING bastard who's not there wen i need it but always there wen i dont.. heh..

it went off and on by itself.. kinda of scary though ... BUT I HATE it.. cause i cant receive proper msgs frm ma dear frens and ppl cant get THRU.. I FUCKING HATE U 7610.. wow wat a cool name ma bf haf.. ;).. hurhur.. pls make it a 3230 if u reali wana buy me a new fon.. not fussy just being nice of telling wat i prefer.. and yar.. i cant seem to tag at any of ur tagboards even mine.. i dun noe watf happen to ma comp but yeah.. so sorie huh if i so long nvr tag u or i didnt acknowledge ur "hi or anything else"...

LIFE... wat else can i say.... sumtimes ur happy and sumtimes u down.. it can happen at any anytime anywhere with anyone...

guess the saying"good things dun last forever" will forever stuck in ma head.. oh well even if u happily married and haf 11 sons... one day u will die and all that will be gone..

its funni that ma sis and me are having msn conversation wen we are just a room away.. she using ma bro room.. well MOM having her pms i guess .. she keep shouting at us frm morning till now.. i swear i wld put a bomb in her blardi mouth if she dun stop ani sooner..

ARGHH.. fuck.. ma hp haf to be a FUCKING bastard at this point.... all ma data are store in the fon blardi hell not in the memory card u asslook alike fon... FUCK.. now i lost all ma frens num and guess wat?? i dun even remember ma BESTES NUM.. OUHH WAT AN IDIOT...

oh gosh.. can sumone just kill me and cut me into pieces and than throw it into diff direction?? haizz...

i feeling so sore and shity 2dae.. i wana hang out with the guys but i just dun haf the mood.. be werking midnite 2dae and FUCK.. im so tired..

im reali looking forward to mon.. i'll be hanging out with yan and fazalan.. GOSH... I MISS THEM... we used to haf fun without any worries.. i miss MA BESTIE AND MA BESTIE BESTIE heh.. seeing them both.. i envy of their frenship.. theye been tight for like 10 yrs now.. will i ever be that long with ma frens?? onli god noes..

i haf so much to tell you.. u been missing for ages and haf not been there for me to update ma life.... u watch me grow up and onli u will noe how to make me feel better... im so RELIEF we didnt rush things and still be wat we are.. if not.. i mite be losing u.. ma bestfren...

maybe we just prone to love each other as frens and not lovers.. watever it takes.. i will always savage our FRIENSHIP cause ur sumone that anyone wld love to haf as a fren.. ;)

MA blardi fon still dead.. ARGHHHH...

thanx alif and bubu dearest for being there for me.. i haf always belief in frienship and it reali works for me... im so happy to haf frens all ard me frm diff walk of life and age...

but one thing for sure.. i guess im cursed for sum part of ma life journey.. a part where i always get hurt wen involving a word call LOVE.. fucking hate that but im sure things will go on smoothly as time pass by..

being selfish is not wrong but it may hurt sumone eventually..

i been there.. im selfish to scarifice ma tyme wit ma frens and end up losing sumone so sincere.. SUCKS..

and seriously.. i dun even noe wats on ur mind.. u seem lost and u dun even sure of wat u want..

but im so sure of wat i want and im so sure of making it rite.. but WAT for if all that just drain

away leaving me in despair?? im not trying to ask wat u haf to do.. im just trying to say think straight and do watever u feel like and not do watever u think u haf to do just to please ppl.....

but one thing for sure.. im happy with you and thanx for ur companion..

and if u ever clear ur doubts one dae and im still ain't gd enuff... im happy to let u live ur own life.. letting u go is hard but that's life...

2005-06-12T10:40:00.000-07:00

....Love rhymes with pity now....

12/06/05... i wld remember the wonderful nite.. neither wld i trade it for anythign else....

IT's been a while.. it's been sumtimes.... and it's just sumthing that i wld nvr regret.. the wonderful nite.. it's beautiful... the movie, the sea breeze, the wonderful performances, the nice view, and not to forget the wonderful YOU make it all worth while... thanks for everything.. for living up the dead part of me..

BUT.. maybe it just meant to be this way.. not to end or not to further it...

watever it is... i just wana thank you for this nite...

u noe u meant alot to me..

sori for being cranky...

sori for being grumpy..

it just the whole thing..

it's too beautiful for me to be HAPPY..

cause i nvr thgt i wld feel this wway again..

2005-06-09T10:34:00.000-07:00

......*YeStErDaE FeElInGs*.....

i miss US.. the fantastic 4.. thats wat dear bubu claim.. hah.. <3

and oso US.. <3

tweet surprise party pics are up.. courtesy of mon darling.... feel free to browse ard.. nites..

2005-06-08T12:58:00.000-07:00

....*Talk to me,Dance with me...*

Im such a loser. still didnt get ma hot hot heat cd yet.. ;(

watch Madagascar and it's fucking hillarious but CRAPPY too.. but wth?? a MUST watch show if u feeling stress or on the verge of dying now.. sure to erase away ALL that wen all u do is laugh the moment the show starts..;) nuthign great happening.. LIFE.. revolve ard werk,werk and werk.. but im not complaining.. without werk, i wld haf die of BOREDOM.. serious shite.. i been neglecting most of the stuff im active in.. i MISS kickboxing,NETBALL and tennis.. sure enuff its easy to be active again in all that but than again COMMITMENT will always be ma biggest ISSUE.. it haf also been part of ma downfall.. i hate the word COMMITMENT.. DAMN IT.. the onli reason i didnt take up a full tyme job is also beacuse of that FREAKING WORD..

im such a whinny bitch.. i miss ma FRENSSSS.. miss the grown up clans, miss the kids and most of all ma BESTIE.... blardi hell.. i HATE NS... i miss driving ard at nites with the gerls... WHERE HAF U ALL BEEN?? or maybe WHERE HAF I BEEN?? i been neglecting them.. i miss u all.. and i wan a hug frm ma bestie.. IM GONA KILL U IF U 4get to buy me the freaking shirt that u promised the next tyme i see yar.. ;) ok ma blog is such a bore now.. its DEAD.. except frm all the stupid whinning.. its not fun animore like last tyme.. miss the blog crush, blog dates and worst of all the stupid BLOG FITES.. heh.. u noe i noe.. but again WTF? its ma BLOG..

and HE say i didnt blog anything about him.. WHY?? cause i dun wana share YOU WITH THE REST.. heh stingy huh?;) Nites...

2005-06-06T10:21:00.000-07:00

....HUgs&Kisses....

HAPPY 20th berfdae to am dearesterest bestfren.... MUACKS.. ma dear bubu(tweet) turn 20 2dae and yar.. go wish him if u guys forget.... the surprised party went well and its kinda fun surprising ppl.. hope he lurf the gift that me and alif had choosen and i noe he WILL...

slacking was fun as its been a while duing that with bubu dearest and the rest as all busi and ESPECIALLY wen ma dear bestie down with sum ugly illness.. haizzz.. cant wait for him to get better...

ok serious shite i dun haf the mood to even update ma blog.. i feel shite now..

maybe im exxagerating or something but hell YOU noe why.. im not mad or even angri.. im just..... haizzz.. maybe i feel stupid to waste ma 2 daes off cause of the thgt of wanting to spend theday with u but in the end WERK issue again and i dun even haf the fucking AUTHORITY to be mad at u.. nvm.. maybe im tired thats why i feel cranky and stuff.. watever it is, i noe i feel beter after sleeping it away.. ;) yeah.. thats all.. and yar the gig on 5th june was a blast even

though im fucking tire as werking nite shift all the way sure enuff haf sucked out all ma energy inside.. ok i just wana sleep off this shity feeling.. nites and so long...

2005-06-04T05:42:00.000-07:00

..SiCk...

Not that im sick... i feel SICK enuff watching true files about this fucking pedophile who TAKE INTEREST in young BOYS onli.. fucking sick.. this kinda of guy shd be crucified and cut his BLARDI DICK and feed it to the sharks.. and ma scd for this coming week sux...

im gona turn into a skinny bastard anytime.. heh.. but no complains.. werk is werk.. ;)

oh well kuddos to ma baby bro who lose his dick on fri.. ermm i mean he went for circumsize..

but to me he still lose sum of his dick.. ;).. well he didnt cry or whine in pain... i LOVE him.. he so brave unlike me.. MUAHAHA... well i feel kinda bad of not being ard at home 2morow for the KENDURI.. but wth?? mum understand and nuthing else matter.. and im actuali kinda of GLAD not to mit up ma other realtive of dad side... PHEW.... ;) hmmm bubu berfdae copming liao... wah ma dearesterest FREN turning 20 soon.. heeee... muacks..

too bad dear faliq cant follow us to kl due to some circumstances.. if fir wont go too i mite as well saty at home liao.. i need ma bros to take care of me.. heh.. and dun worry dear faliq.. i wont get angri and wont throw tantrums like i used too.. MUAHHAH.. im a YOUNG lady now so i wont sulk for the stupidest reason ever.. hahhaha... im stuck at home on a SAT which i rarely get to spend of as werk took most of it... and to make matter WORST mum woke me up as early as 8 knowing i slept at 4 am just to follow her to the blardi stinky market and WTH just to buy a few kilos of freaking big PRAWNS which i cant even EATTTTTTTT....BAHH... and wen i thgt i was off the hook (as she make me wash the toiletbowl, wipe all the blardi dust frm her precious antiques and not to forget clean up ma beautiful wardrobe..) she haf to blardi drag me follow her,aunt and couz to GEYLANG.. WOW.. a sat eve spend in geylang.. baik ar.. melayu HIDUP... wanita melayu terakhir arhhh... NB... just to find stuff for couz wedding which im super excited about but lazy to get involve with.... hahaha... so yeah thats all bout it.. ma wonderful SAT ever.. ;).. ok 2morow gig liao.. WOW.. its beeen a while..... ok go..

2005-05-31T23:31:00.000-07:00

...I nvr told u wat i do 4 a living..

The new store at terminal 2 is fucking huge i tell yar.. and the crowd there oh well.. im used to it.. yesterdae ma throat fucking dry after 6 hours non stop duin cashier and asking those morons bla bla bla.. sumtimes i wish that the old peeps there wld take an iniative to buy those ear device if they blardi hell noe they cant fucking hear a thing unless i shout.. damn..

and yesterdae coaching the new staff was quite fun cause their clumsyness and the fucking blur face make me wana laugh everytime.. hey i was like that too in the begining so i used all the patience i haf to coach them and i suceed... they love me.. MUAHHAHH.... mel give up cause i guess she herself is a BLUR COCK.. heh.. love u though.. wat i hate most is that now we haf to make fresh juices.. I HATE THAT... u noe how leceh it is to cut the fucking fruits like watermelons, oranges and bla blabla.. their skin is not SOFT mind you.. and the freaking ice storage is blardi damn far frm the blender and cashier.. wah i swear im gona lose 10 kilos at least... i reckon 10 kilos AT LEAST....

but overall the place is perfect.. maybe the new staff make it hard for us to werk smoothly.. but they learn and we gona haf a good tyme.. ;)

i miss werking with faizal.. im not gona see him for this week.. haizz... maybe nxt wk we shall plan our schd... heh..

and now i can watch live soccer matches anytime even at werk.. YEAYNESS... cause the tv rite infront of our store is the espn CHANNEL.... how FREAKING WONDERFUL IS THAT??.. ;0

2dae and 2morow i'll be werking midnite.. pls pray that i wont get stoned which i freaking noe i WILL... ok im out of words now.. 12 JUNE is the confirm date for the kl trip.. and alif dad get us a free 5 star hotel room 4 2 nites.. HOW COOL IS THAT?? it means we haf bath tub in our toilets and it means WOWNESS for me cause i swear i can sleep in there.. wohoo..

i cant wait to haf the kids surround me again.. miss THEM badly.. <3

2005-05-30T11:18:00.000-07:00

...antidote for me anione?...

i just finish crying...why??? i dun noe.. no idea... all i noe is i miss ma best fren, i miss tweet and i miss ma bros(fir,faliq)... im scared of being grown up.. it sux... i cant accept the fact that im all grown up.. i haf to fend myself.. i cant rely on daddy and mum for everything and even help.. i miss ma old childhood.. i miss growing up.. i hate being a grown up.. i miss dad cuddles and mum kisses....

But i hate ma past.. ironic.. yes it is.. ma past haunting me... ma past let me be sumone whom i detest most.. a weakling.. i am now.. i dun even dare to admit i like sumone.. why?? casue ma past... keep haunting.... i scared i will turn into an evil bitch again.... dun laugh wen i say im like anakin.. anger and ego boost me.. im scare im guin to the dark side again wen i haf that sumone.... i noe sumone haf open ma heart but u noe what it sux.. i hate being weak all over again.... im sorie i haf to tell u cause i hope u ignore me so i wont fall deeper for u.. ironic?? yes u shd noe.. im always am the ironic bitch..

i dun wana hurt myself more... im sad too casue i cant take the great changes in life...

why am i such a spoil brat?? i feel incomplete now that i end school and i haf to werk all the tyme.. its killing me not to see ma frens everidae like it used to be.. i miss faliq hugs wen im down and i miss fir and bubu sweet words.. i miss u BESTIE... i feel down now.. u not here again with me wen im feeling down...i dun blame u.. u busi with ns... u cant run away or just leave everyhting to help me... i MISS u and i need u...

maybe the changes is too drastic for me...

i cant even face him now.. i dun cause i just feel like shit....

im so used to guys telling me everything and duin anythign for me.. but this is the 1st tyme i ever let out ma feelings and i feel SHITE..

u may take it as a joke but serious shit its been a while since i feel this way...

i enjoy ur company i reali do.. u are truly diff frm others that i haf known.. it's ok.. it wont matter anyway...

i hate being sad like this.. i need hugs now.. anione?? i need hugs frm ma bestie to cool me down... he noes wat i want and he noes how to calm me..

im such a whiny bitch now....

i nvr belief i wld like anione again but im wrong...

tweet sick now.. he's down with chicken pox.. i hope he recover soon.. i miss him.. i miss his hugs too...

than fir for accompanying me just now.. i love u and u noe i always do.. thanx for the advice... its been a long tyme i ask u for that and u noe it rite... ;)

i dun feel like duin anythign now... i just wana cry myself to sleep...

and hope i wake up forgetting ma past.. sumtimes i wish i lost all ma memories but i noe it sux casue i will forget ma loved ones too and i wont want that to happen....

i hope things will be the same for us.. u a great FREN... and maybe thru this will onli u noe wat exactly i feel.. ;)

"The Closest Thing"

You're the words that come out easy,

And I am speechless at best.

Your star it seems to shine above the rest.

You're the face before the cameras,

The smile i'd like to earn.

The closest thing to perfect,

In a hollywood to burn.

You're the beauty that is deeper,Than eyes can merely see.

The closest thing to perfect.

But the farthest thing from me.

[Chorus: x2]

I'd love to be,

The shoulder that you cry on

I'd love to be,

The friend you call when things are great.

You're the dream that hasn't ended,

And I'm still anxious for rest.

Your words they seem to hang above my head.

You're the bud before the flower,

Unfurls into full bloom.

Captivating beauty,

But it maybe all too soon.

You're the song that writes a story,

But leaves a lot to read.

The closest thing to perfect,

But the farthest thing from me.

[Chorus x2]

And like I really deserve a chance to,

Sit across the table,

And tell you that I think you're wonderful.

And I think you're something special.

I guess this is my only chance to,

Say I wish I knew you,

Because I'm sure you're wonderful,

If I'd get to know you.

.... how true that sound.. ok dun label me as emo now.. nites...

2005-05-26T07:21:00.000-07:00

...*CRuShEd*...

ARGHHH.. bo bice LOST.. shitoo.. But wat saddened me most is that WTF..... carrie VOICE aint that GOOD.. i mean her voice is typical and her looks too... we haf too many singers LIKE HER in the industry.. dun we need a change??? i swear if bo ever won, it will be a new era and a new winner for american IDOL.. i mean look at the past 3 winner... its all about POP and SOUL/RnB... wat about this rocker over here who definitely can sing any kind of genre without any BLOOPERS... and the man who made history by singing without the LIVE bands?? ok im so gona hate reality shows now.. haha... WHY?? cause sergio won THE CONTENDER which i hate .. hahah.. how i wish still that joey wld be the winner... ;)

and pardon me.. ANTHONY LOOK SO CUTE.. haha but it was a gd collabration btwn him and ANWAR singing "i believe i can fly" alongside with kenny g.. WOWNESS... those two haf the strongest vocals and they both steal ma heart.. i wld definitely buy their album if there ever be... ;)

Been thinking lately... Will i ever settle down one day with sumone who can reali TAME me??

who can turn me into an obedient ,sweet,innocent young gerl who wont dare to CHEAT or LIE to her love ones?? not say that i am one now it just that well.. human error are common guys..

i longed the dae to see myself happily indulged into that sumone who will make me live in our own world.. just both of us..

i definitely believe in KARMA and been there done that haf make me grown more sensitive towards others feelings and not just to think about myself..

i truly regret hurting THAT sumone feelings over ma selfishness.. not onli that SUMONE but others too..

now.. looks,wealth,fame,popularity is all BULLSHIT to me..

i dun need that kind of person in ma life animore.. all i need is sumone who entrust his heart to me and asking me to take gd care of it by returning the LOVE back..

HOW SWEET... this is the lonegest tyme i ever been single and thruout this tyme, i gain ma responsibility and guilt back.. there was a tyme wen syikin dosent even feel GUILTY at any of her mistake...

if ever there be a dae where sumone open ma heart again, i wld try or maybe NVR to let him down again.. but for now... im happy this way.. i rather fill ma heart with loneliness than fill it with regret and PAIN again.. i dun wana go thru that sucky journey ever again..

i noe how it feels to hurt others and getting hurt urself.. both way IT SUCKS big tyme.. but still thru out all this i do still belief that out there love do exist.. looking at ma parents whose still guin strong and still loving each other endlessly, i have faith in LOVE.. sumdae sumhow it will happen to me.. ;)

*If only I had one wish, I'd want a million trillion lifetimes that I could spend with you...Fall in love with you again and again....*

2005-05-25T21:39:00.000-07:00

*..GlOrY..GlOrY..*

Did i ever tell u guys im a proud liverpool fans since i was 10?? did i?? WOW... and i HAF nvr been so PROUD until wen they score their final penalty shootout and CRY with pride as they WON.... YEAH MAN.. POOLS WIN CHAMPIONS LEAGUE..... i didnt belief it... i CRY with THEm.. i did.. TEARS are hard to stop at that moment..

the 1st 1 min goal frm ac didnt damper their hopes..

ANd theys core all 3 goals within 15 mins of second HALF.. HISTORY MAN...

until now im smilling with satisfaction as POOLS show wat they made of... like wat critics say.. pools will always do well in bigger and important matches than any of the ordinary matches.. GAWD...

BUT im such a loser.... i slept wen pools was at its critcal moment.. i feel asleep exactly wen crespo score milan 2nd goal... HEHZ>>>> cannot tahan babe..SHIT.. i miss all the fun of penalty and DID KAKA open his shirt?? heh.. i was such a bimbotic supporter yesterdae!! instead of looking and concetrating on the game ma eyes keep wondering ard for KAKA... muahahhaah.. cant blame me what.. HE'S FUCKING CUTE and haf a torso of everione dreams....

Hopefully the kida can make up their minds wat dae or week to proceed with the KL trip... COME ON guys... i cant wait... just put aside everything 1st ok... ;)

i think ma wknds gona be a blast.. hopefully get ma pay by FRIDAY so at least i haf extra cash just in case.. hahah.. cant wait for saturday though.. I MISS YOU...

we go and rock the houz down... hopefully faizal and mel will not be werking on sat and hell yar... maybe we can drive ard again like it used to be last tyme.. WHY MUST GOOD THINGS COME TO AN END??

why cant we just continue having fun and it dosent haf to stop ????

nvm.. its not LALA land.. LOL.. so i must wake up now and find a full time job... i cant forever be depending on mummy and dad... ok thats it..

im BORED.. ;(

2005-05-24T11:27:00.000-07:00

...*Slit ma throat*...

STUPID management made me go and take that blardi JAB.. i noe ppl say typhoid jab are not painful but oh well any INJECTION is painful enuff for me cause i haf NITEMARES after everi jab given.. WHO don't wen u down with sum illness and u haf to go for stupid jab almost once in 2 mths and a BIG painful jab that is.. no worries.. i dun haf AIDS.. hehz..

LIVERPOOL get INTO the finals EH.. its like WOW.. i swear i wld stay awake just to see THEM beating ac and lifting the cup up with full of PRIDE.. they shd... and im sick enuff hearing about GERRARD forever dun noe decision and BIG CLUBS offering him a PLACE.. FUCK LAH.. the reds wld do GD even without gerrad or owen.. just gif them $$ and BOOM.. talking about $$

GOSH... i spend again... did ma hair new color and i did sum nail ART for both handws and legs.. GOSH their nail art is superb... its more artistic than those bitchy kind of manicure or pedicure.... THE artistic design on the nail attract me so much that i just haf to do it.. well anything to do with artistic design wld make me ATTRACTED.. haha... they use arcyllic pain which im not NEW to it.. use to spend a bomb on that during sec sch daes for art... GOSH i miss art and DESIGNING.. CAN'T wait to start SCH.... oh nafa u gona change ma life...

ok so i spend quite a sum for the painting but its worth it.. all i need is to take gd care of it so it wld last long.. DAMN why am i such a HARSH gerl... HAIZZ...

Mel was ma GERL for 2dae.. sori mon i didnt bring u along shopping BUDDY cause i noe u start ur attachment 2dae.. ;)

saw FAZ on train and GOSH i miss u SHITHEAD... hmm.. go out with ur FRENS onli how bout me ur SO CALLED BESTIE?? heh.. im not mad just jealous.. lol..

he's getting thinner dae by dae... didnt saw yar for 2 wks and u SHRUNK.. didnt they gif u enuff food there?? NS =BITCH..

hurhurhur.. i MISS HIMMMMMMM so much.. its sucks wen u drifting apart frm ur bestie and haf to amke tyme just to meet each other.. miss those daes where a phone call away and BOOM... he's THERE... i miss sharing ma stories with hima nd i MISS sitting ard duin nuthing and just talking about us.. HE's SUMONE whom i wldnt trade for anything.. even for KRIS ROE.. but that mite be negotiable.. muahaha.. oh well he's ma BESTEST DEAREST fren whom make me happy for the past many2 yrs.. thanx dear ones.. wen tweet go NS im gona miss another bestie of mine.... fir too.. ouhhhh why u guys cant escape like FALIQ... and go JIHAD instead... ;)

watch mtv on DASHBOARD surprised concert.. so sweet of them to do that for their fans..

if ONLI THE ATARIS did that under ma void deck.. WOW.. i'll be the happiest women alive man..

and i wld DIE hearing kris singing " just one last time, can i kol u ma switheart, ma bestfren, why do all good things comes to an end?"

haizz YEAH its true.. all the gd tymes spend with ma bestie, ma classmates, ma collagues haf come to an end.. BUT still i hold them close to ma<3..

MISS U GUYS<3

2005-05-21T12:01:00.000-07:00

...*Don't hold this against me*...

im PISSED oh so darn pissed rite now.. WHy?? fuck the WHy thingy.... even if ppl noe wats the why is im still fucking pissed.. make sense ??.. DAMN...

ppl always complain about having no frens or too little frens ard them.. but guess wat..

TOO MANY FRENS SUCKS TOO.. get it?? u dont?? yar too many frens sucks too.. casue u end up on kness trying to please everi fucking fren of urs...

serious shite... sumtimes i hate the saying..gerls are just a burden...

this is the tymes wen SEXISTSM start to come alive out of me.. but WTF?? everi single gd frens of mine are guys.. BRAVO well done syikin.. u haf always been the wonderful fucking IRONIC gerll.. woohoo...

oh FUCK with pleasing everione.. its tyme to PLEASE ur ownself... and FUCK.. stop thinking about pleasing ur diff grp of frens cause u noe wat?? eventually either grp will end up sulking noeing u didnt take their OPINOINS SERIOUSLY..

Fuck everything now... cause its making me piss off..

i reali LOVED MA FRENS but wen tymes like this.. serious shit i no longer gona stand all the whinnings and unreasonable REMAKRS of doom.. DAMN..

why cant every human born PERFECT?? cause this is just a fucking CRUEL world like i say.. but once again thanx god for letting me live in this WONDERFUL and sumtymes fucked up world.. AMEN...

2005-05-20T23:47:00.000-07:00

...*All good things Have endings*...

Ma wknd are BURN.. but i dun give a damn.. all i want is to SAVE up loads of money for the trip and oso to buy a new MP3 for me.. OMG.. listening to mariah carey MY ALL make me so fucking EMO now.. damn gona turn it off... blueak.. KUDDOS to ayu who haf started her EVER 1st job... hope u give me a treat one dae wen i drop by just to IRRITATE yar.. hehz.. amacam best huh werking wit ur CRUSH?? lol.. hahah...

to the kids.. WHEN ARE WE GONA WATCH STARWARS DAMN ASS ???

i swear im gona watch ma self if no one wana plan the outing.. HEHZ....

just had a talk with ma BESTIE and i always love asking advices frm him.. HE make me feel so GROWN up and responsible now.. He tell me not to waste ma tyme enjoying maself and not planning on what ma next move is.. HE's RIGHT.. i been wasting ma tyme for so long.. HAIZZZZ..... but of COURSE i still wana study... BUT i haf till next yr to spend.. ma admission to nafa will onli be in nxt yr APRIL... so i haf freaking loads of tyme to kill...

haha.. PARDOn me but i find it so FUNNI wen most ppl are happy to get thru HIGHER nitec...

haha well maybe i can jolly well GO HIGHER nitec in the 1st plc but it just that im not interested in the courses given... engineering,mechatronics,electronics are ALL not ma type.. haha BUSINESS of course a BIG NOO oso.. and i admit i lose heart wen i couldnt get a place in IT at higher nitec cause the FIGHT was tough for a place there.. and other courses sucks.. thats why i ended up taking multimedia WHICH was also not ma choice as dad FORCED me..

i badly WANTED to GO NAFA.. if not i wld haf left a yr or so before graduating frm nafa and i wld haf find a job WHICH FUCKING SUITS ME.. damn it.. but nvm.. because of dad who forced me to go thru ite i found loveble peeps as ma GD FRENS.. HEHZ...

but aniwae CONGRATS to those who are guin for higher nitec which i think a waste of tyme but KUDDOS to those who get to pOLY... THATS a big LEAP...

i freaking swear guin ITE sux.. but wth?? i haf 2 yrs of HELL and HEAVEN there...

oh well serious shitz.. im bored and i FREAKING lazi to get ma ass to werk..

BUT like i say MP3 is wat i been eyeing on so haf to werk ma blardi ass out... i WONT depend on DADDY for anything again casue i believed this PAMPERED SPOIL BRAT daddy's gerl haf grown up... and i HAte BEING GROWN UP....... growing up is better.. get me??? if not than u SUX.. big tymes...

* being grown up, is not half as fun as growing up* GETT IT...

2005-05-18T10:12:00.000-07:00

....... NOW It's OvEr........

School officially end for us 2dae.. JUST now paper was easy.... ANYhow do easy lah... muahahah.. than haf to saty back awhile and finish up sum HUTANG.... didnt atted sch most of the tymes so i miss sum important phase test and class test.. but again thanx to HIGH tech modern world now.. muahahah test was as EASy as 123.....

HAHH fir shd noe.. MP3 kepe??

took some silly pics and some memories lanes..

the canteen(hall of fame), i-net(starbux),trackfield(hell) and loads more.. MUAHAHA..

and we even took pics in the gerls toilets.. coool yor..

wen dinner with the peeps at bdk corner and full like HELL...

KHAI IS A FREAK who dosent eat seafood or maybe fish at all.. FUCKING FREAK...

SORIE to horbits as we all ARE BROKE and so thats why we cant make it to seoul GARDENS.. nxt tyme ar..

GD luck to the HORBITS grp, the GANGster yet FRIENDLY grp, the GERLS grp and ermmm who else i miss out huh?? MUAHHAHAH... i dun wana noe.... well maybe thats all ar i think ma classmate.. MUAHAH..

ok... gd lucks to you guys and hope u guys haf a great future ahead.. we might not be close but mmt2x are the coolest class ever.. pardon for all the wrong duins... miss u GUYS..

to ma GROUPIES YUPPIES.....

i LOVE u GUYS...

we(fir,faliq,tweet,alif,khai,ayu,khus) will always be the bestest frens in times to come...

i WILL MISS U GUYS SOOOOOOOOOOOO much..

no more lepak-ING at mama shop, no more lepak at SINGAPORE POST, no more lepak at library, no more counter strike,no more mee soto(boohoo), no more SINGING session in class, no more COPYING session during exam sadly no more everything that we haf done for the past 2 yrs which made us such GOOD FRENS...

for alif and me..NO MORE MR AND MRS BRIGHTSIDE FOR US... mehehehhee...

lol..

well ITE mac will always be rememeberd as the worse school i ever attend.. but netherless gainning PRECIOUS frens whom anione wld ask for..

ok so lets PARTY before TWEET go NS.. awwwwwwww.. MA BESTIE...

and yar.. to you.. GD LUCK too in everything u do..

watever it is you USED to be our GD fren back than.. sad to say..... things ruin the FRIENDSHIP maybe sum evil creature... but u are happy..... gd LUCK than...

AND HOT HOT HEAT is ruling me now...

lets dance hommies... LOL..

GOOD nite GOOD nite.....;)

* The best Dae ever* *hugs*

2005-05-16T10:23:00.000-07:00

....GooDbYe....

im gona miss ed and his WARMTH famliy.. those late nights at his super big houz movies by the pool(he haf this small movie room facing the pool), baking session wit aunt amy,and bitching ard with guilian his ever BITCHY LOUD SLUTTY sister whom i heart... haizz.. all that gona end as they gona move to US this fri..

no MORE sesamme CHIX PASTA,no more CHINESE NEW YR hongboas and no more BBQ turkey for CHRISTMAS..darn.. hehz...

even though we decided to went on our sepertate ways, he's still a gd FREN and a SWEET ones too..

im gona miss YOU.. its true wen ppl say u will onli realised how much that person means to YOU wen he/she totally GONE out of ur life..

im thankfull for all ur care,concern and ur love for the past 3 yrs we know each other.. u will always be remembered as sumone who haf been a GD FREN,company,LOVEs and all that u ever done for me..

hope we wld still acknowledge each other in future if EVER there be a dae where we cross our path again as frens,strangers,lovers cause u mite nvr know the future ahead of us.....

DO well in ur studies and MAKE US proud of yar..

FAREWELL DUDE....

oh well.. i BOUGHT ma preeti FLOWERY slippers.. YEAYNESS cause TRULY MADLY speaking im BROKE..

WOWNESS.. but i dun gif a damn.. since wen huh?? ;)

i got the job at TCC but having doubts now.. OH why do i even went for the interview... NOW im stuck..

ok i will START werk nxt tues so there's plenty of times to think thru..

if i get any job offer which i like during that period i wil gladly abandon TCC but if ma luck SUX than i will go for it..

BUT STILL... i went thru all this shite just to run away frm werking for THAT BLARDI BOREDOM office job.. ;)

2morow mite be the dae where i FINALLY FINISHED ma ever neglected mcc project to be handed in on WEDS .

and yar to those who dun noe this.. our EXAMS start at 1pm on weds..

WOW.. since wen syikin cares?? well basically i dun gif a damn thats the reason why VIVEK our advisor call me up personally to tell me about it.. and yeah.. KHAI, FALIQ, our appeal for davt haf been approved so NO NEED TO STAY BACK liao.. muahahahah...

MITE be having the last dinner or maybe lunch with the KIDS and the HORBITS this weds..

IM SO GONA MISS u guys.. hurhurhur...

and im so hounoured wen POOH bear(reza frm horbits) msg tweet to bring us along for the last reunion after school..

and OF COURSE im GONA watch STARWARS this wknds but u noe wat?? im werking.. DOUBLE SUCKNESS..

ok im off to sleep... suddenly syikin feel sleepy at 1.45 am which she rarely DID..

and yar TOM win survivor PALAu...

poor IAN gif up immunity for the sake of his INTREGITY..

*APPLAUSED* to mr cutey cause common....... face reality who wld ever gif away 1 million for that??

and i ADMIRED steffanie strength as a WOMAN.. she's truly sumone who i SALUTE too cause she much more tougher than most of the guys there or shd i say ALL of the guys there? ;) ok im a REALITY tv freak.. enuff said..

2005-05-15T09:16:00.000-07:00

*...3.15...*

Y 3.15?? well watch amitville horror on sat nite wit peeps and hell YEAH... the movie freak me out or maybe US..hehz.. Went absolute crazee after that and went to EAT supper at this place which i dun even noe how to explain.. but it was pure fun.. and i just learn noe sumone ask( do u FRENCH?) it means do u noe how to french KISS... LOL...

i noe im slow but OH WELL.. OVERALL... 8/10..

go on and watch it GUYS buttttttttt dun, if u a're on a 1st date... HEHZ.. it mite bring out ur inner secrets.. MUAHAHAa.. waiting for NR 7 is HELL... damn it... and im DAMN broke.. hurhurhur.. i spend like HELL the past 3 daes.. buy loads and loads of stuff... and todae flea market was COOL but didnt manage to buy much stuff... and i GET a preeti skirt for onli TEN bux.. cool shite sia..

tweet and me bought a PREETI new bag for ourself 2dae.. so PROUD of it.. mine is way cooler though.. hehz..

i got a mickey as a bag.. CORNY.. but i guess mickey CRAZE is totally hitting the young hearts now.. everiwhere we go we can see mickey stuff selling at WOWNESS price where last tyme we can easily grab a mickey t shirt for onli ten bux or so..

i admit i use to scold ma mum for getting me a mickey t shirt wen im 10 but now im totally CRAZEE over wit their stuff. IRONIC isn't it?? but eth?? its syikin we talking about here..

I LOVES MON AND TWEET company.. hehz.. the bestest couples i ever hang out with.. maybe we shd HANG out EVERIDAE wen i get a new DORK for ma bf.. MUAHHAHAHA..

and im miss ma BROTHERS BADLY.. faliqqqqqqq and firrrrrrrrrrrrrr... where are YARRRRRRRR...

it's been ages since we three hang out 2gather.. i miss u GUYS BADLY.. hurhuhru.. now all got gerls 4get me..

i thgt im ur onli SPOIL BRAT sister.. HURHURHUHRUHUR....

;(

GOD PLS GET ME A JOB SOON... i dun reali wana WERK AT that fucking BANK... anione or rather EVERIONE help me find a nice f&b job.. if not im gona be force by ma uGLY mum to werk in ma couzin UGLY werk plc.. office jobs just sucks... i HATE waking up in the morning and wearing stupid office WEARS..

HELP ME>. even though the pay is FUCKING good i FUCKING HATE the FUCKING job.. everidae face the 4 walls do the same things and ma life will be like a FUCKING ROBOT.. i HATE U OFFICE FREAKS..

hehz.. nolah.. kidding onli..

ok 2morow will be another LAZE ard dae for me.. miting evil MON and see wt the plan will be..

the guys are gona haf their MAY 16 at sentosa and too bad cant join in the fun..

but 19 KL EHHHHHHH... that's will be MUST.. muahahah..

im gona kick ma STUPID coming late habits as i noe everione ard me is surely enuff.. FUCKING PISS at me..

so before everione HATES guin out with me i better CHANGE the habit.. well maybe that will be a nice resolution for nxt yr.. haha i noe i SUCKS...

2005-05-13T22:22:00.000-07:00

....* Living in ur Letters*....

SHOPPPING was a bitch.. hah.. i bought TWO tops and a wrap skirt.. WEEEHHOO.. me and mon haf the greatest shopping tyme ever as there's NO ONES to kol us hurry us up like usual occassions..

THE guys went play soccer yesterdae.. thats explains the quiet shopping environment.. HAHA..

SUN we guin thrifting and that means spending again.. hehz..

I haf to save money for te kl TRIP but i keep spending...haha nvm..

i sill haf DADDY.....

ma feet still sore due to walking ard the whole dae..

went for an interview at tcc in the afternoon and walk ard town the whole dae after that.. i cant wait to get the cute flowery SNADALS.. sorie mon but YEAH im gona buy 1st.. haha its fun sumtimes to haf ur shopping buddies with the same kind of taste but it SUX too.. HAHAHA..

ok i haf to werk 2dae which sux alot casue its SATURDAY man.. and im always out but well i guess sumtimes scarifices ur time for money is KEWL.. ok im crapping..

and HAPPY BELATED BERFDAE to ma DEARESt SISTER and ma DEAREST couzins..

god pls help these two WOMEN to haf a bf soon so they wont be a burden to ME ever again.. hahhaa..

wow ma sis is growing up but in ma eyes she's still the little sister i always had..

wen i see gerls ard her age who haf bf weraing slutty clothes,clubbing,smoking,drinking im SO happy that ma sis is not in either one of that catergory..

well it seems that whenever i see sumone ard her age duin adults stuff i wld go HEY THEY SO YOUNG.. but ma frens will look at me and say well they are 17 and way past underage.. HAHA.. well becasue i haf a little sister that age thats the reason why im so PARANOID..

and ma bro is getting CIRCUMSIZED this june.. did i spell it rite?? haha.. hes gona be a BIG boy now.. weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

2005-05-12T01:37:00.000-07:00

.....Yesterdae feelings....

DID u GUYS NOE THAT anthony FEDOROV haf just been voted out of AMERICAN IDOL and it sux??

LETS all cry togethere.. COME ON..

he's cute,intelligent,sloppy and well HE GOT A GREAT voice..

wat else is there to deny about this cute nerdy singer?? hurhur..

BRANDON flowers is ma new love of this season even though who the fuck wld like to haf FLOWERS as their family names.. HAH.... AND once again KL here we COME.. just cant wait for that.. anyone can follow us except UNAUTHORIZED PEEPS.. ok im bored.. turning insane soon. and well i miss ma BESTIE.. he been away for sooo long.. nah.. he's in town but shift work SUX big TYME.. his off daes are so not ryte for us to hang outs.. DAMN.. i miss EATING seafood at NEWTON with that IDIOTS.. hurhur.. WEN ON earth are u guin to ORD?

hehz and im gona miss U LITTLE SUCKERS whose guin ns soon.. ma life guin to be pathetic wen more goes in, in tymes to come.. and ma DEAR bubu is guin SOOn.. HOW pathetic is that HAVING 2 bestie IN camp??

NVM.. FALIQ BRO is till available.. he's onli away for JIHAD.. muaahhaha..

and i miss u APRIL HONEYS.. wen are we guin out for some kick ass BITCHING??

and ili YEAH we hang out soon aite.. set tyme and date.. ;)

2005-05-10T12:38:00.000-07:00

....TrIbUtE...

at tweet houz updating ma blog cause i cant sleep... finish our pjt and yaR finally.. BUt ok cant deny tat bubu darl did it ALONE.. ok so me and khai came here just to eat macroni GORENG and watchband of bros and view friendster list... MCC is not done yet cause tweet dun haf a clue on how to help us and KHAI- he as hopeless as me.. they both ar snoring away now and im bored to tears... GOSh school ending soon and im GONA miss school.. MISS gossipping,haf SILLY fites(hah u shd noe),miss having the SAME ans for all test(hah we wld force one of us end test and tell us the correct ans..hehz),

and most of all miss looking at mr BRIGHTSIDE and the way he make me smile ;)
i wonder why must he lie to us saying he dosent haf a gf wen he DID haf a sweet gerl for one.. haizz.. but its ok.. we now..
i dun haf any clue now on wat to type just that i haf the coolest school mates ever..

We are the most SLACKEST and REBELLIOUS grp that any teacher wld HAF nitemare everi single dae..

I admit im one of the WORSE students ever. yeah no doubt about it.. even though im a gerl i think the guys in ma class did WAY better than me .. hah.. well gerls supposed to be a teacher p;et where they did evryting given on time and wld NVR haf the courage to SKIP any lessons.. well let me tell u.. gerls this ERA is sooo way diff aite.. ;)

I FREAKING swear khai SNORE can make any DEAF ppl came to their senses back and its reali scaring me.. i update more wen im home 2morow...

...........Edited.........
ok back and WOW.. i mean the presentation in skoll was a blast.. we get to see everi single individuals grp

hard work ......

And i guess alif grp and mine is ONE of uncompleted project and nuthing much to talk about.. well but HEY our grp are the cutest ever rite?? hehz..

and ok pardon me for a while..

ANTHONY ANTHONY.. ok im falling for this cutey frm american idol.. ;) i wan a bf who can sing like him.. HEHZ..

his sing MELODIC ballads this wk and gosh his voice.. AWWWWWWWWWWW...

and well since this is a tribute POST.. i lwd love to thanx 1STLY ma dear bubu for handling the project urself and still allowed khai and me to be part of it... even though we SLACK the most u still did stuff for us that ppl wldn't bother except for sumone who totally is a gd FREN and thats you..

ALIFFFFF.. ma lovely titi.. hehz.. promise to do the editing of the advertisement wit u BUT oh well i slack...

BUT still he didnt even complain abit even though i noe he FUCKING hate having me as his editing pARTNER.. haha... BAK SO mee ok titi??;)

BUT hey i admit khai and me slck the most BUT we did THE most in our music video OK..

NOSTALGIA.. hahah.. YEAH we were the main actress and actor in the video and yar we scarifice most of our others activities for this PROJECT...

and we haf to endure getting BITES frm stupid insects and FRM mr SUNNY who dun gif us any FACE during our shoot and we both end up BATHING in our own sweats.. and yar i admit KHAI is a better actor than me.. ok fullstop......

OK now that our last yr assignment is done all we can look forward is to our next reunion which i belief SOON and yar we THE KIDS are guin for kl trip on the 3rd week of JUN and that's CONFIRM...

well eventually me and khai suggest SIBU island but that needs lots of preparations and MONEY as well so we wont bother guin on a trip which we gona be on worriedstate the MOST..

To faliq fir and tweet,didnt noe that i can still find GD soulmates and TRUSTED frens even at this stage of our lifes..i TRULY ADORE u guys and u haf been there for me ALL the tymes in gd or BAD tymes..

no matter HOW big ma mistake is u guys wld always ease me down with sweet words and encouraging advice rather than DOOM me straight away... even though i HAD lots OF troubles wit ma past friendship and RELATIONSHIP, u wld be the ONE to judge me thru ME and not sumone else.. and even though how bad ma DATE or BF is, u guys wld still play a gd HOST in accepting them as ur own frens for ma SAKE.. hurhur.. u guys are the best of all in malife.. ;)

adn to others like ayu,khai,alif and khus,dosent mean u guys dun mean a thing..

i dun haf to tell how much u GUYS mean to me casue u guys shd haf KNOWN for all the HAPPY times we spent.. Even though at the MOST crucial moments where we had sum shits wit ppl whom we use to kol FRENS, we guys still stick together and nvr leave each other handle anything alone..

WE stand up for each other rights and pardon the wrongs we did..

* THE KIDS* are wat we now and KKK is just piece of shits.. HAHHAHA..

yeah THE KIDS man..

ok i think ma post is awful long and maybe kinda of ermmmm... FORMAL?? hah..

and yeah man i love the horbits PROJECT.. their project is COOL CORE....

i mena their short story wld be MORE than eligible for the short film awards.. it's nearly move me to tears.. and hussaini look DARN CHARMING in that video.. haha.. and he look so gd acting alongside with the gerl.. COOL AR U ALL...

and i wan a copy of that casue im proud as u GUYS are ma classmates and u guys ROCKS.. haha..

and becasue of u guys im addicted to simple plan *untitled*....

OVERALL MMT2x rock big tymes and our class is the ebst ever ermm maybe if not for some SHITS.. HAHA..

soooooo lonnnnnnnnnngggg and gddddddddd niteeeeeeeeee..;)

2005-05-09T07:58:00.000-07:00

.....I’m awake but my world is half asleep.....

Did it ever occur to u all that one day we wld die? DUHHHHHHHHH.. i noe.. pardon me cause i just realised it in a realistic way... well kol me a freak but hey sumtimes wen u bored, u let ur mind wonder ard to sum fantasy world but NOT everytime u will visit LALA land.. there will be a tyme u will WONDER wat its like to FACE ur future and FACE the possiblities that wld befall u..OK IM CRAPPING but i guess im turning insane everidae everi hrs..

Oh well swensen was great for me and sis.. haf the tyme of our life gorging ourself and ended up BLOATED..

take sum silly picvs for the fun of it..

well i feel kinda DOWN now due to wondering soooooooooo much about ma FUTURE..

Got nag and accused by mum of being UNFILLIAL towards ma other elders.. SUX yar i noe im at fault.. hey its not ma fault im not showing them any respect wen they themself dun respect EACH OTHER...

im such a sweetheart not to SHOW them any disrespect everityme we mit, but guin there and adress them on ma own accord WILLnvr happen.. MUM u shd noe how they treat us.. LIKE SHITS>. so im gona do the same..

i LEARN that in this life u cant GIVE anione RESPECT if they dun give a DAMN about others.. thats like me worshipping buddha.. U GET IT rite?? nvm.. im sorie mum and i will TRY to PRETEND loving them even though its FAKE..

as for grandma i love HER to bits.. i swear that DAD wld take the iniative to let her live wit us so WE can bond wit each other MUCH more and she wld always be well taken care of.. and trust me i love her so much that i wld nvr forget her.. being DISRESPECT to her is not even on ma mind.. MAYBE showing her that i love her is the PROBLEM.. im sux at THAT and u noe me better.. but im sure grands noe i love her and it just that SHE stuck wit sum aliens species which HAF to be ma aunts and uncles that i cant visit her cause easy I HATE ALIENS species... oh well i feel SO SORE now..

;(

2005-05-07T22:02:00.000-07:00

**A BlAsT**

Yesterdae was FUNCORE... well didnt reali get to catch all bands but i think all the gd bands are scheduled late in the eve...

AND HELL yeah.. THANX mummy for asking me to wear all black and damn i look so DARK yesterdae.. DEAR ARSON was gd as ever and they rock the club down but too bad they were scheduled last and most of the crowd went off earlier.. i dun understand why these peeps bought tix for 10 BUX but onli sit down 4 a while and went home early AND miss out the gd bands???? haizz..

MADNESS.. loads of pics are taken and yeah i HAF upload it.. go take a peek..

IT was fun when the crowd sing along to helena during cc set and it was totally FUN and FULL OF FUN..

ok i noe im long winded.. but hey IT WAS REALI FUN.. BUT HELENA is a bad song to MOSH..

And i thgt they weren't guin to mosh but AGAIN i was wrong... hit ma hand against the stage wen being pushed and iTS BLARDI pain.. nvm..

SORIE to ma bitches couzins cause i didnt follow u all to HRC...

OH well u gals shd noe that i haf nvr like CLUBBING and haha no matter wat u gals say i wont.. and it scary to hang out witth u HIGH CLASS BITCHES cause u gals always get drunk and always attract THE GUYS.. so

i rather gif it a pass.. but miss YOU gals though..

thanx to sis LYNN for ur lovely sweater and tube top u bought for me.. and thANX CINDY for ur chocolates and sorie i didnt JOIN u all yesterdae..

well PROMISE i wld make it up to u gals the next stopver aite..

BUT no clubs plssssssssssss.. haha..

well its kinda fun to haf air stewardess as ur COUZINS

and GOODNESS ME>> german chocolates are so darn YUMMY tthat i indulge all of it alone without sharing it wit anione..

i wonder wen will it be ma turn to fly away LIKE THEM and visit loads and loads of diff countries and culture..

BUT thinking of flying away,making me think of ma FAMILY and FRENS too.. i dun haf the tiny winny bits of heart to leave them...

ok THIS THGT is making me sad again.. I WILL think it thru.. though time is reali passing by FAST

2005-05-03T22:10:00.000-07:00

..BoReDoM..

Salute to dear bubu who is the onli one in the clan to wake up early and took both test.. as for the others.. CHEERS cause it means i got company if anything bad happen to ME.. HAH..2morrow IS a must to be in school as to hand in sum LOVE letters to the HEAD od multimedia department which i think sux casue i dun noe wt love poems to write about.. but KHAI being an expert in this, will be sum help to US.. haha..

AND THE REDS win the match.. 1-0 2wards the blues is MEANINGful enuff for me.. thanx to garcia for the goal.. WOW cant belief i didnt watch the match as ma STUPID eyes cant keep STILL..hehz..

and WET DREAMS is a must for u movie FREAKS.. why.. oh gawd u wld nvr want to noe the contents of the movie.. FREAKING SICK AND HILARIOUS.. And i thgt *DOING* it with a pie in american pie was SICK but who haf guess u can even *DO* it with CUP NOODLES?? HAHA.. stupid and sickening.. didnt get wat i mean?? go on and catch the movie to find out more ;)

Im bored 2dae and thgt of guin out and shop a bit..(hehz a bit..lor)

BUT than seeing the num in ma account i haf to think twice..

and i guess ma DEAR lil bro miss me as much as i miss him..

He rarely ask me to feed him but upon reaching home,he sat beside me and talk about wat he did while feeding him his fav chix rice..

he sleep beside me and kiss me so MANY times.. hahah wow.. miss that idiot..

AND serious shite.. ITS totally sick to watch MTV JAMS cause all these hiphop or rnb shit dosent haf anything better in their video except LOVE,MONEY,SEX,WOMAN and SEX....

Why cant their video be sumwhere else rather than the typical NITECLUBS(with half naked women dancing)

or those big veri wealthy RESTAURANTS or CASINO?/ its so typical and we can see it in almost any part of the clip.. but WTH?? i guess all that i mention above is wat revolving the society now.. SEX,MONEY,LOVE.. all this play a major part in these successful blardi RICH artist...

and yar.. serious shit.. i just hate the sight of those BIG UGLY MUSSCLES on those rappers.. ewwwwwwwww.. they look FAKE and look like u stuff loads of meatballs in it.. ;)

im bored so pardon ME..

2005-05-02T10:58:00.000-07:00

...*DaMnIt*...

GAWD.. ma fav boxer joey gilbert lose todae match but still he's a hero in ma eyes.. he's like a turtle who hides in side it shell but aware of wat happening ard him... he's not a coward just a laid back low profile guy.. TODAE match was bloody damn bloody and i admit i cry seeing his painful face trying to hide the fact that the broken ribs are kiiling him and his face MA gawd itwas so distorted that i cant even look at him.. well 2dae match was btwn 2 of ma FAV boxer.. miguel and joey.. WELl i guess theres onli 1 winner and eventually one haf to lose out anytime.. ;) overall the most NERVE wrecking reality showever shown.. thumbs up..

2005-05-02T04:35:00.000-07:00

...*BlesSeD You*...

It was a wonderful sight and feeling to see one of ur close frens getting hitched HAPPILY..

MEl was drop dead GORGEAUS... SHE was a happiy bubbly beautiful princess on that dae..

Take loads of pic wit her but to bad didnt bring ma digi as ma dad brought it along wit him for the holidaes...

IF NOT i swear ITS gona be ME and ME all the way cause i feel extra PREETI that dae wearing those silver suit that ma poor mum fork out FREAKING loads just to make her daughter PREETIER than she is.. MUAHHAHA.. ego+1000.. nah i just feel diff as its so hard to get me in those kinds of dressing.. i still prefer shorts and oversized tshirts... wear that to sleep and i even dream of having dinner with KRIS ROE.. hehz...

i post sum pics that i managed to shot using ma handy 7610..

Supposed to start werk at 8 todae but came at 11.. Thats the reason i cant get mad wit FAIZAL for all the shit that he ever done cause he's a sweetheart.. punch ma card for me and i get 3 hrs pay for just sleeping ard.. ;)YEAY... ma horrible yet lovely family is bcak and well i guess im gona miss ma privacy.. like i say.. HOW IRONIC..

and yar... this is indeed a small world.. DIDN'T noe that mel haf a talented monkey for a cousin who sing for a band and even play the trumpet.. WOWness for the monkey...

hah.. alif and tweet WILL noe who im talking about.. didnt croos ma mind that he's a cousin of the lovely MEL.. aiyooooooo.. make me feel so uncomfortable wen he enter the room and i swear i was close to fainting wen i saw it was him...

WHY?? why cant it be mr brightside or anibodi else that i FANCY??

haizzzzzz.....

supposed to watch movies todae but im drop dead tired and of course i wana spend tyme wit ma lovely bro.. miss him...

just now i did sumthing BAD.. i was hanging the laundry, yeah i reckon HANGING the laundry which i rarely DO but haf to as ma famili were on holidaes i haf no CHOICE...

ma 3rd floor neighbour drop their towels on top of ma laundry and becasue of ma laziness and always loves to take things easy, i push the towel so as to avoid them knocking on ma door asking for their towel.. HAHHAHAHA.. im BAD so BAD...

but wat can i say if u HAF me as ur lovely neighboour....

AND backstreet boys is back wit their new singles.. HEY b4 u mock or laugh at me..

it was BACKSTREET BOYS who rule me before my chemical romance, before thirtteen senses, before atreyu AND even before THE ATARIS... hah...

oh well.. it was ma first ever cassette at that point of tyme wen ma cute uncle bought it for me for ma 10th berfdae... hey i was ten ONLI aite.. and now i still <3>

haha but dad and ma metal uncle is the ones who make me known to METTALICA,DEEP PURPLE,GUN N ROSSES and YAR bon jovi all tyme fav.. hahah...

and best of all ma COUSIN who make me known to blink 182 wen im onli 11 and they were still wit their old drummer.. he oso introduce me to those goth and metalcore music wen im onli 12 and still remember mum face wen he found me in ma cousin room listening to those songs.. HHAHAH.. but IRONICLY ma cousin now changed totally changed.. he's a wanabe HIP HOPPERS now which kinda make me sad cause i truly detest these daes young kids who dress like one of the rappers without knowing the true culture of hip hop..

HAIZZZ.... but oh well...

ok im blabbering too much i guess...

so long and gud nyteeeeeeeeee....

*the LOVELY mel*

*Isn't she lovely,the one in GREY?? ;)*

2005-04-30T21:47:00.000-07:00

......I ReMeMbEr MaY......

And the winner goes toooooooooooo I REMEMBER MAY...

wow cant beilief our ears wen that appen.. but surely enuff its haf to be happening since i remember may is the onli band who rock the stage out of stardom... Congrats to others winner of various category... proud to say most of the winners are frm ITE MACPHERSON.. cool shite... the band,the solo and the dance grp... i nearly lose ma voice out there but NOPE save it for urgent uses...MEL is getting engaged todae and im getting readi to see ma beloved fren.. I MISS MA FAMILY... BADLY SO BADLY...... they having the tyme of their life out there while sadly to say im not enjoying ma freedom.. i just wish they were back sooner cause i will cry6 of sickness.. HOW IRONIC.. curse and badly wanted to stay alone wen they are always ard ur neck but miss them to death wen they are gone.. and i wld lurve to thanx ma DEAR bubu(tweet,MA DEAR bro,faliq and fir) 4 accompanying me at home.. they are the onli TRUSTED guys ard and i love them to bits... they get to see ma WOW room ... hehz.. its such an eyesore and no one else get to see this CUTE gerl and her 'CUTE bedroom" hahahaha... 2dae they will accompany me again.. I LURF MA bros and BUBU.. okok... 2bad u cant be here.. i noe ur gona werk 2dae and 2morow so i wont disturb u... but mum wld please if u are the one taking care of ME... i miss u dumbhead.. GUESs u are forgiven.... im so used to it for the apst 5 yrs.. so im not gona make a big fuss over it.. but plss dun take me for granted or else u mite just not noe wen im here for u AGAIN.. ok i better get readi... im always the LECEH want.. 2 bad YOU and yan cant be there 2dae... awww... MAKE SURE U GUYS ARE THERE wen its ma tyme.. HEHZ... miss u 2 gundhu.....

* the WINNERS of STARDOM 2005 for the band catergory*

2005-04-27T10:22:00.000-07:00

..* Go ReDs*..

Will the REDS lift up the curse for the previous 3 matches which they lost to the bloody blues...

we'll shall see tonite and im so gona make maself awake to watch the(hopefully) triumph or maybe just another bad day for the reds.. watever it is i shall hold on to you the REDS whom i truly belief a unique set of individuals..

wth am i blabbering?? easy say LIVERPOOL u go guys...

ok im done.. ;)

2005-04-26T22:47:00.000-07:00

....* NeW SpLuRgE*....

I been thinking hard since last nite...

Since ma hp 7610 like having a bit of problem i decided to let it go and BUY a new hp.. HOW cool is that??

i just realised ma line haf been over a yr and i can upgrade it and still get the new fon at a reasonable price.. Wow...

IM GONA GET THE 3230.. OK PPL ARD ME ALL ASKED WAT THE DIFF cause these 2 fons haf same function and why i need to buy a new fon?? simple.. i lurves the design and i think 7610 is over populated...HAHHA...

and 3230 got 1.2 mega pixel which i noe dun make a diff but who cares?? like i say ma 7610 haf an accident and before the sickness become worse im gona send it away and get a new baby.. MUAHAHHAH.. i noe im heartless but i swear i wont do that to ma real BABY..

so i pray hard that uncle still gona offer me a gd price like the one he offer a mth ago..*cross fingers*

and MA TITI(alif) haf a new haircut.. he look sooooooooooooo MATURED now.. yeayeay... no more karipap...

and he look fashion core now.. muahhhah.. and he ar stupid u noe.. go cut hair for 25 bux and ppl offer free drink he dun want.. ok i noe i kiasu but hey FREE who dun want?? ;)

well if i get ma money todae i swear im gona change ma hairstyle...

im gona do it at loreal professional where they cut,color,treatment and personally style u for just $138...

its consider cheap for gals u noe.. so im gona grab the offer before it goes out of stock..

NEW look cant wait.. haizz but money is always the problem.. ;) blame me for always getting maself broke wen the fact is if i save up ma money well i'm consider a rich bastard.. haizzzzzz.....

but oh well wat for hold on to ur money.. die cannot bring oso what??

and yar here are the pics of ma TITI new hairstyle and the lovely baby whom i consider an extra addition to ma family cause she always here everidae(well she ma neighbour child) and we wld pinch her cheeks and bite her leg and wen she cry we gave back to her MUM.. MUAHHAHA... next door onli mah..

alif the man who look like a pen

*( ps. anibodi interested in ma titi see me her jiejie 1st k..;)*

2005-04-25T06:26:00.000-07:00

*Your eyes, resting in flame*

Pics of paradigm gigs are up...

SOOO dun say i havent upload yar... having stomach cramps now due to the blardi menses.. come at the wrong tyme.. im guin sentosa tommorow and it haf to come 2dae..

WAH... so loong oredi and im so excited about guin 2morow... i cant wait to get maself tann.. i lurf ma skin wen it's tann.. it look so REAL.. i mean it dun look like sum gerls whose skin look like sum black lady after they went tanning... well thank god for that beautiful skin.. ok dun want ego wait 2morow sunburn i die...

Supposedly guin out wit ma 2 dear BROS but faliq haf to cancel it last min wen im ironing ma clothes with penuh semangat cause scared of fir nagging at me for being late.. he warn me oredi... hehz.. but its ok cause i feel LETHARGIC the whole dae..

the fann wong show at 9pm is cool like carlito.. and she sure is preeti wen she wear those eyeliner.. i lurf her fair skin.. any guys wit that kinda of skin cum look for me ok.. u are wanted..

Im so happi for mel who's gona get engaged this sun..

wow.. IT WILL BE A 1ST TYME FOR ME SEEING ONE OF MA GOOD FREN GETTING ENGAGED/MARRIED..

AND im so gona miss ma family wen they guin of for a holidae to indonesia this wknds..

im so gona be all alone.. its not that i dun wana go but mum noe i haf to attend ma gd fren wedding and she noes im guin for stardom this sat to see ma FRENS in the finals.. see bubu.. i come just for you.. HAH..;0

SO thats the reason why im not guin and maybe more but shdnt disclose it yet:)

i wish they come back safely...

and allif dun wori.. ur bro will be alrite.. he's cute like me..

so guys lurf ur siblings and appreciate them before anyhting bad happen... aww saying this i feel im gona miss ma baby bro the most... that idiot... haizzz... i will sleep tight wit his smelly pillow so i be reminded of HIM.. haha..

i just love him..

2005-04-23T23:11:00.000-07:00

**All I want is an apology for what you did and how you treated me**

im so so tired.. reach home 5 in the morning.. and mum was like WOW thats early man..

ok im sori mum.. but she was a switheart though... no NAGGING or anything.. maybe she realised im 20 eh this yr.. GAWD..

yest plan was FUCKED up because of FAIZAL and YOU.. i hate you yesterdae...

before that went to the gig at pasir ris and it was COOL.. DEAR arson was COOL.. i love the music apart fmr tthe unknown screaming.. hehz...

and its been so loooonnng i went to ska gigs.. haha it was pure fun and guin there was totally unplanned...

i was waititng to go out at nite wit the grown up clan and was bored to death in the afternun.. so i kol tweet and alif and suddenly we were at the gig.. HAH.. coolness...

than i was happi looking forward to see the grown up clan plus a cute guy yesterdea whom ppl thgt is MA BF.. WOW.. i hope so.. hah..

mR assy faizal is the one who palnned this outing and in the end after waiting for 30 mins at his BLARDI FUCKING gf houz carpark he kol us saying he cant go.. his gf mum wont let him go.. MAKAU.. ur gf mum is totaly a FREAK.. fucking freak.. u onli been 2 wks plus wit ur ugly gf and she treat uy like her OWN son..

i bet ur mum dun treat u even this way.. sad to say faizal everione is soooooooooooooooo disappointed in you.. look at yan.. he haf to werk in the morning at 8 and still he try to make it and onli get a few hrs of sleep.. FUCK lah.. if u read this post faizal im so sori but seriously i feel like punching ur face and kill ur ugly gf..

and dun ever blame me if im not gona smile to that ugly bitch animore... she made us HATE her even more.. we tried so hard to accept her noeing her fucking attitude but wat the fuck?? i dun gif a damn now...

and YOU.. i gif in to you for fucking loads of tyme.. and yest u just blow me up.. i reali cant even be bothered to think about ur feelings animore wen u dun gif a damn about mine...

yest i feel like giving up on us our frenship our beautiful bond but strength and ppl ard me told me to let it go.. to forgive and froget but WTF?? i always forgive but can nvr forget wta u do..

this tyme ur swit words ur ever lovely forgiving voice will not werk on me..

i just hate you wen u do that.. break ur promise and expect it to be settle wit ur stupid sorie face....

u even joke why u need to come and say i miss you??

YEAH i miss you that s the reason i wana u come.. but thats not the whole point.. everione else is expecting ur presence IDIOT....

why oh why u haf to do this???

u noe wat.. im not sulking but seriously i dun gif a blardi DAMN about u no more... go and fuck off wit ur life.. soooooooooooo sori if ma words hurt u but ur actions hurt me more that u can ever knew...

i think i need tyme to reali understand u ma so kol best fren and switheart..

i miss you but hate the sight of you now...

.....................................................................................................................

and im gona mis ma dear bubu.. he's guin for ns on 22nd july..

i missing him oredi...

i will make use of the remaining 2mths to spend countless happy moments wit ma dearest fren before he SUFFER.. hah... ;)

and mr brightside found his mrs brightside oredi.. she so sweet and preeti.. suit him.. im not angri or even hating him.. we no longer in sec sch..

im happy for him but just dissapointed of him not telling us the truth.. but its ok.. everything settle now and u will always be ma mr brightside cause u always make me happy with ur smile...

i hope he will not feel bad cause i dun mind... hope we can still be siling frens.. ;)

2005-04-21T21:35:00.000-07:00

.....ScArY......

OMG... yest went to grab supper after werk as usual and sally was so sleepy she cldnt open her eyes to drive us back.. but than she haf tooo....

After sending faizal, ii was ma turn and theres onli me and sally in the car...

sally was sleepy and she was not sure of the way while i haf NIGHT blindness and im soooo unsure of directions...

THAN we came across the old ever haunted road,along the old tamp rd there....

SIA ar.. theres wqas no other cars except us and the sight was so scary that i haf to cover ma eyes in case anything unpleasant pop out...

sally was nervous trying to find a way to get us out of there ASAP...

there was this tyme wen we feel like sumthing flying off above ussss.....

NB CB.. i freak out and broke in cold sweat... cause the car roof can be open and we open it that tyme for the reason of getting sum fresh air and for me to pop out ma head to look for cute guys thats wat we planned.. but wat we didnt noe is that instead a "CUTE GERL" fly above us.. how cool is that huh?? NB...

and that happen ard 2 plus in the morning...

in the end sally haf to wait for me to reach home safely before she drove off knowing wat a SCARY cat i am... HAH....

morale of tHE story...:

i wont offer myself to be sent home last ANYMORE AT ANYTIME aite ;)

and yest did yar watch OC??

why CAUSE the KILLERS is in the houz...

oh gawd the vox is and awesome charming guy whom any gerl wld kill to get HIM.. HAH>>

"jealousy turning saints into the sea"

and i miss mr brightside todae.. nvm... 2morow will always be a better DAE..

2005-04-20T07:24:00.000-07:00

........... DIe u HOrRiBlE MiDgET.............

I FUCKING swear im gona KILL you NOW if i can.. let see who the fucking ass now.. wait till i reali HAF u in ma clench I SWEAR IM GONA KILL U MIDGEts... SHORT SMALL GERLS ARE WHINY and they haf to be KILLED especiasly U
and wait i lurf to kill ur family especially ur parents FOR LETTING OUT A fucking ugly midget like u..

im gona hang u naked and let all the ugly bitch eat u alive WELL U ARE ONE OF THEM...

2005-04-20T02:12:00.000-07:00

.....SuMoNe TaKe Me To The Doc,SuMoNe KoL ThE NuRsE.......

i feel soooooooooooo sick rite now.. terribly sick....

and i didnt wqake up in tyme for ma tennis lesson.. BOO syikin...

OK why im so sicka nd tired is because been staying up at the chalet for 2 consecutive NITES and went back onli in the morning..

didnt went to skul cause oh well everione noes syikin must haf t least 8 hrs of sleep...

todae thgt of guin for the 2nd class bt hey i was defeated by TIREDNESS.. so end up in bed and just woke up...

Overall it was FUN but again i think the 1st nite is always much more fun than the other.. it always happen that way..

before that wen to watch creep wit him and it was full of CRAP.. but i think the movie is ARTISTIC but he thinks its a waste of money and tyme to watch... and i guess he wins cause we hear ppl complaining after the show.. gona watch wet dreams soon wit ma korean movies kaki soon.. ;)

I dun haf a clue why im smiling nowdaes maybe i haf sleep of all ma stress..

STILL face reality syikin.. projeck havent finish and im gona graduate in a few WEEKS...

arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhh....

ok i miss mr brightsides smiles and i jiss skool.. gona go skul 2morow and eat the mee soto.. i miss that sia...

and oso sorie alif for having to belanjia jiejie icecream snacks and stuff.. u still the best..

AND i swear no more chalet for me in this coming mths.. im gona die of tiredness and im BROKE..

i wonder how im gona survive wen ma family guin for holidae this 30th till 3rd may..

how im gona survive sleeping alone at home??/

by hook or by crook i make sure im guin back to ma aunty plc at BOONLAY eh cause she ma 2nd mum.. and i swear i wont go back to ma aunty houz whichh stay in the same blcok wit me cause i freaking hate her.. thanks... and pics will be upload sooooooooooooooonnnn.. sorie bubu im TIRED.. hehz..

2005-04-16T23:52:00.001-07:00

..ShAgGeD..

How i wish i dun haf to get ma lazi arsse to WERK.. im SOOOOOOOOO lazi nowdaes.. i guess lazi isnt even the words to describe ME... ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.. woke up at 2.30 just now.. WOWNESS>. well came back late yesterdae to watch late nite movie wit peeps after the gig..

INFECTION(jap horro movie) is indeed horro.. trust me guys.. this movie freak ME OUT.. it's so much more worser than juon or the ring..

GAWD.. i noe i scream the loudest but hey even FALIQ9super macho guy) shout ok...

i just feel like wlking out and go home.. casue i wld die of FEAR there...

BUT hey the story isnt any ordinary shite.. its all mIND FUCK.. serious shitz i dun fucking understand the movie at all.. it's much more twisted than the ring and worse ju on(i dun even exactly understand this two..)TRUST me put all the confusion aside.. the suspense and HORROR itself are making u crazee..

i haf goosebumps evenafter the movie ended.. GAWD...

well but its a gd show just focus and maybe u mite noe wat the shite is about.. ;) lucky alif titi not there.. if not i swear he's gona crush our hands till pieces.. and he's gona shout at the top of his lungs everi sec.. ;) hah..

but its ok i forgive u but belanja jiejie ok on MON... MARCHE ar.. ;)

The gig was cool i lurf gig at clubs but the crwod is so HAIZZZZZZZZZZZ... the space was there the bands was putting an effort but the crowd just seem DEAD..

Ceramic circle new vox was OK ok apple..

well his voice was great wen he sing slow songs but pardon me... i haf to shut ma ear wen he sing helena...

YES>.. thats terrible... but overall he's ok AND YAR.. he sound like sum radio dj duin sum request show wen he introduce all the songs.. slang fucker i must say.. but hey the gd thing is HE SHORT just like the other 3.. so it's equalize their standing on stage.. HAH.. ;)

but i guess ppl are still prefering the 4 piece than the new 5 piece.. but hey changing are a constant kind of trademark now.. we haf to follow in order to keep the pace up...

its always hard to accept changes...

BOOHOO>>> im quite sad u didnt join me for movie yesterdae.. u rather go wit ur UGLY stupid mind frens..

i dun give a dan mingling ard wit them BUT u found it so hard to be SOCIALIZE..

wat a BESTFREN i haf... :(

ok im guin to earn sum money now.. BYEEEEEEEE..

(*pics are up wen u see it up there ar..HAH corny i noe but i upload wen im not LAZII)

2005-04-14T10:33:00.000-07:00

*GiFts AnD CuRsEs*

I guess i beeen curse or maybe that' s a gd gift..dun get it?? than blaaaaaaaaaaa....

Well im turning LESBIAN maybe.. HAH.. no dun wori just kidding... i still do adores guys aite...

i mean there this guy whom i thgt cute and attractive werking in aiport but he dosent seem to be interested and didnt even smile at me everytime he walk past...

But than thanx to frenster he tag me and we became frens since.. and SInce than he been asking me out and i haf given him loads and dozens of excuses..

and i didnt even bother to pick up his kols or even msg him BACK...

i MEAN am i LOSING ma mind....

well im always adoring him but wen he's in ma clench i simply ignore that and just forget all about him.. GAWD,, i dun wana be the old syikin again but why am i like this??

SIMPLE... maYbe i found sumone who i miss most and willing to do anything for him.. and wat the heck??he still living in DENIAL.. but i dun mind...

i guess it's true.. the person u loved may be just the one next to you.. not sumone whose totally out of ur reach...

But well, let just follow the flow of this DRAMA.. HAH..

but than again i lose the anxiety of dating anione...

i used to lurf to go on dates especially wit guys i been eyeing on but now things are not the same..

the anxiety,excitement haf all vanish away frm me.. and dun ask me WHY?? i simply dun haf the slightest clue..

i rather sit at home watch tv,eat,chat on msn,ROT and off to bed..

this LIFESTYLE used to be detest by me sooooo much.. i wld sneak at everi chance to go out wen im free,,,

but now even if i haf the whole dae to myself i wld rather sit at home and get LAZI...

maybe i miss duin these simple things which i detest last tyme..

The most i wld go out wit ma close buddies or ma families and thats it...

even sumtimes i haf to say no to ma buds cause im just plain LAZIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII...

WHY OH WHY?? i miss those old daes but i just dun haf the ANY MORE interest in duin that..

maybe mum's right.. maybe what she say about me READY to settle down and be wit ma loved ones is true..

HAH.. YAR dream on syikin.. go and wash ur dirty laundry1st before even think of anything like THAT..

seriously i dun feel like duin anyhting nOW.. dun feel like making any possible chances...

BUT i wld lurve if mr BRIGHTSIDE is the one initiate ANYTHING... WOW that wld be great.. i wld dress up for the date and wld be on ma bestest possible ever BEHAVIOUR.. HAH,, how ironic of ME to think that..;)

but watever it is i just hope that i get to be wit sumone i truly adore and STILL goof ard wit ma EVER CRAZZEE buds..

yar they like MA BUTT.. always stick ard and haf fun.. AHAKZ.. CORNY yes i noe..

i dun even haf ani clue wat im blabbering about.. and yes projek was cool just now and we at the verge of finishing the video clip...

i promise i will show everione who haf been pestering me about the vids...

ITS freaking cool i tell yar casue SYIKIN is IN IT..

that say it all.. HAH ego+100 ;)

well HOPE he can make it to the gig this sat or maybe i shd say I WLD MAKE IT cause i noe its guin to be COOL SHITE... like me.. cause im cool and i love to SHIT...

AND sumone is guin to be there and its shocking me to death..

well maybe for the sake of HIS fren whose playing in a band he's there if not i wld faint hearing the news...

IM SO GONA look forward to see wat they up too.. WOHOOOOOOOO.. shiokness.. gossip terhot di dunia yer...

Jealousy turning saints into the sea..............

WHERE are you?? i just want a simple hi frm u and thats IT... but u noe WHAT?? i lurf this game..

it just so meeeeeeeeeee... ;)

sis guin to laselle maybe and WOWNESS..

stupid poly didnt haf enuff classes like i haf say earlier on in the earlier post.. go search the archive if u reali kepo on wat i haf say...

if not she's just guin to take higher nitec and proceed which i think is a waste of tyme and a PIECE of holy shite..

MA small bro is getting on ma nerves cause he will sing "shut up shut up................" frm simple plan in his own WAY which he haf compose everi SINGLE morning.. and its WORSE if the video clip is being aired.. i swear i cld die of MADNESS....

his guin to grow up into a VAIN pork i tell yar.. everi morning after bath, he will comb his brownish straight long hair and will come up to anione of us in the famili and say"eh adek cam david seh"="hey i look like david(simple plan) seh" GAWD..... why oh why??? but lucky his ma cute lil bro...

dad wld always laugh at his own way of singing simple plan songs...

and i burst into laughter wen that dae he scream following the used singing live on the warped tour..

GOD.. his voice... HELP me... turning me deaf ani sooner...

AND sumone help me destroy ma X BOX cause his grades gone down because he wld spent everi single sec on it.. he even lie that dae he haf no HW so that mum wld let him play his XBOX...

but still even though his grades went down it still good... ITS NOT FAIR... he born smart whhile me and sis always struggling like hell to make ends meet.. ok maybe i shd just say ma sis cause i nvr ever try to struggle in ma school daes before.. HAH.. LAZI mah.....

but thanx to COUNTER STRIKE who make me what i am todae.. ;)

ok im done... sleppppppppppppppppp.. so longgggggggggggggggggggggggg.....

*DAVID... HAH...*

and can i marry u kris plsssssssssss im in love wit u since u a fat BOI

2005-04-13T01:30:00.000-07:00

............ThE GroWn Up KiDs which i MISS...............

...........ThE CoOl KiDs WhOm I <3................
Those whom i heart but dun haf ur pics send me ur pics ok than i POST ur pics..HAH..

2005-04-11T08:01:00.000-07:00

......Tell me what it's like to be alone........

I feel sicked plus delighted todae....

Fistly i feel like im guin thru a break up which im not..;)

and secondly................................

awwwwwwwww.. SICK cause i cant sleep yesterdae and had to wake up early just now plus the terrible bus ride to school it make sense why i feel sick... straight after alighting i rush straight to the toilet and it dosent make me feel any good especially wen i rush inside this cubicle and there's shit splattering everi inch of the bowl.. BLARDI hell.. shit oso nvr PASS>.. asholes..

so i rush to the next cubicle and let out everything i ate the previous dae....

maybe im too blame to eat too much on the previous dae..

well i haf to cause im so HAPI...

but than *good things dun last forever*

It's so hard wen u think he's the rite one for you but in the end he dun think otherwise..

why the hell does looks matters wen it comes to LOVE??

oh well its ur say ma dear but i do noe that u deserve everi bits to be wit me...

Cause no one will ever haf ani say about ma loved ones.. since wen do i care about ur LOOKS??

since wen i go for guys wit looks?? HAH.. ok take back ma words.. i mite say all tat to ma frens but hey in reality why do we even care wat our loved ones look like?? love blinded us and there's nothing more to see...

but once again u make it a point cause yeah we are JUST fine like this.. but me deserving a BETTER guy in everything is simply BULLSHIT.. sorie.. i dun take LOOKS for granted aite..

:(....

but still we are as happi as usual.. im just so GLAD i let it out and u dun even feel awkward towards that..

u even thanx me for letting out ma thgts so u can TOO...

But i do treasure u sooooooo MUCH u noe that rite?? haizzz..

but hey its sunshine after the rain........

im always ur well known miss optimistic as USUAL...

looks on the brightside of life...

saying about brightside.. WHERE ARE U?/ hehz...

oh well the pain in ma head are killing me to bits...

i shd go for a full check up .. i FEAR of ma health.. all those NKF darma and health documentaries are freaking me out... i dun wana suffer wen im old...

it will be sooooooo troublesome... i wana live happily and healthy till the end;)

thanx BUBU for being there for me.. and alif too.. ;0

Thanx yan for the advice and others who haf always been there since day 1 i noe u..

IM gona get ma hair cut but im scared it will affect the way ma hair grow rite now....

oh well i dun noe wat im crapping but onli ppl who MIND their hair will noe this shitz...

hope SALLY and mel can make it this thurs for our hairstryling day..

MAMPOS sally.. well leha real name is SALEHA but mel nephew and nieces call her sally.. even mel granny..

HAHHAH how funni that can BE?? but still cute.. hah.. SALLY oh sally the ever BLUR driver but a gd one... hah...

haizz.... im still stuck as to decide wat im gona do after graduating and that's left a few more weeks for me to think.. im not gona stuck at OBRIENS all the time.. its BLARDI sux.. mom ask me to continue or even join as a full time even ma bestie say that but NOWAY.. i will not.. how cruel can ma mom and he be?? dun they see how miserable ma life is there and how tough is it for me to handle this adult issue of jealousy there??

ARGHHHHHHHHHHH...... but thay haf ma affairs at heart... muax...

i hate the feeling of being broke.. fight wit mum about this and i feel bad shouting at her AGAIN..

always say sorry but do it again..

i admit im ANGRY AT HER but wen she say her last sentence and just push her door slightly and sobbing herself to sleep i feel so BAD oh so DAMN BAD.. i regret wat i did.. but i noe that dae she reali realised that its reali her fault thats why she just lay on her bed and sob herself to sleep... i didnt mean to tell her about her mistake but than im SOOOOOOOOOO ANGRI to blurt it all out..

but hey we are good now BETTER i shd say.. sAY soRRy...

loved her even more than ever.. she always there for me...

i noe it may sound ironic but than we always bicker almost everidae but than again she the bestfren i wld ever wish for...

she mite seem fierce and strict to EVERIbodi but i noe she's a lovely women and a kind soul at heart.. well she's ma MUMMY after all.. MUACKSSSSSSSSSS>....

it seem that onli noe i realise the meaning of LONELY...

i use to neglect that as i had all ma times used up but now no matter how busi i am or how crowded Ma life seem to be i wld still feel lonely and wld always soothe myself down.. maybe i miss those warm hugs and those sweet words to soothe me.. BUT hey i haf ma mum to say that to me and ma DAD.. hehz.. so dun get me wrong.. im not desperate for GUYS love aITE.. ITS SO FAR AWAY FRM WAT IM SAYING.. hahz...

OH WELL AND I MISS YOURS.. ;)...

well gona catch sum sleep and so longgggggg..................

*You can stay tonight,*

And make everything alright.

You can hold me down

And tell me that you're right.

Tell me what it's like to be alone.

And we have this down,

Unlike everybody.

I'll spend a million nights

Just like tonight you know,

I screamed your name at the sky,

Until I lost my voice.

Well I'd give my life for you.

2005-04-10T10:25:00.000-07:00

....HiTcH A RiDe.....

2dae was such an unplanned outing but hey last min outing are much more fun casue all managed to turn up.. hahah..

actuali had to get ma lazi arss to werk ma but lucky ever so sweet izwan managed to cover for me as usual laziness overcome me...

so i was lazing ard at hm wen suddenly mel kol and ask weather im werking and i say no and she say lets go for a ride in her dad car..

and i thgt it wld be us 3 gerls onli but than ma bestie and yan wana join in and lastly the ever so LECEH faizal.. lucky yan and faizal gf were not there casue i wld die of suffocation.. hah...

haha so we proceed to LAU PA SAT and as usual gorge ourself... i swear im so gona GAIN loads of weight everitime wit them and as usual i get free food..

thats why i say being a baby in the grp are so KEWL..

WOW... i gulp 4 piece of chix wing... haizzzz

WOW the car ride plus the breeze and bonus by sitting beside u make me wana hold u tight and dun wana let u GOOOOOOOOOO...

hahah...

u noe wat??? i miss this grp... this grp of warm hearted frens who all haf grown up but still haf the kid self in themm... awww they are ur true soulmates...

i can tease them like hell no matter the age gap...

i wonder will we be this tight in times to come?? let say 10 yrs down the road??

well mel is getting engaged and we are so happi for her..

she controling her diet now so that she can get fit into her beautiful gown...

aww sweetness...

im so hapi for her.. <3...

wen we all tok about wat stuff to buy wat stuff she needed and went shopping wit her.. excitement arose me...

i mean im still a grel after all..

and frankly i was smiling thinking of ma own big dae....

haizzz... ;)

BUT it will be a news ard the world if ever i ger hitched.. i mean gawd imagine me sitting QUIETLY for few secs is hard enuff how bout few hrs.. HAIZZZZZZZZ.. haha

well im getting lazier each dae and im sure mum HATE me for this..

OK wana catch sum sleep for 2morow..

i swear this projek thing is KILLING me.. i freaking SWEAR..

pics are up and go grab a bite at those.. HAH..

2005-04-08T12:26:00.000-07:00

.......CaN i KoL U Ma SwItHeArt,Ma BeStFrEn?.........

Why are feelings meant to be complicated?? why cant we even understand the simple thing that we want in life??Why must there be doubts and the fav phrase"NOT SURE OF"??

this is life i guess...

I see ma frens who haf BF,GF,DATES cant run away frm their relationshp problems...

But why me who haf no bf nor dates at the moment haf to stuck with this problems like wat they are facinG??

dun get it than arghhhhhhhhh.... im sooooooooooo lazi to even describe the simplest detail of the prob... cause im tooooo plain lazi to even think about that...

but nvr will i DENy he was a gd fren who haf always been ther for me...

we will sought each other companion if we thinks we miss each other....

no words could describe how much i owe u for parts of ma happiness...

i thgt running away and mit other ppl will solve the prob but in the end its u i will lurf to be ard with..

but nvr will i harbour the thgt of being wit u cause yeah im tooooooooooooo ego.. so blardi ego to even admit im falling for u... i will forever say u are just ma best fren whom i lurf so much....

but it's hurt me knowing that i just cant run away frm you animore...

it's been 5/6 yrs since i noe u and still we are strong after sooo mnay things happen...

We look like childhood sweetheart.. cute ain't we??

I was so happy wen we sit down and i pour ma heart to you....

telling u everything that u haf miss while u away on DUTY....

the bad times i haf,and even the good times that i had without u in it....

we are always so close at heart but far away in reality...

Our world is just to diff but that's not the reason we shd distance ourself...

im so hapiiiiii to see u each and every single moment....

THANX for tonite where u drive me to those places that we had gone before along this 6 yrs...

Memories are still FRESH and i cld remember wat we did in all those special place.....

There was the padang where we celebrate ma 1st berfdae together and u bought me this huge delicious ice cream cake....

that was 5 yrs ago ma dear but still i wld feel the excitement... since than we celebrate our berfdae together..

even if it's just a simple movie treat or a simple dinner but wat matter most u are there everi single year that i grown....

To you.... hope watever it mite ends i hope that it will be a beautiful fairy tale that i had always dream of...

i wldn't want the ending to be the part of me losing u forever...

i wildnt regret and care any less if we are not meant to be 2gather but im content just to noe that im ur bestfren,the fren who always occupied in ur heart most of the times...<3

Well watch the pacifier just now and gawd i give it 5/5...

damn funni and cute show... i just lorve the way he handles the kids....

the baby are sooooooooooooooooo cute....

watch it guys.. u wld nvr regret....

Wen to this place which tweet lead us... it was awesome i tell ayr and its look so kewl even though i sweat most of the tymes casue im scared of heights u see....

haizzz...... i just wana sleep off this feeling of mine.....

lets hope 2morow will be a better day for me......... ;)

2005-04-07T11:43:00.000-07:00

.........ThE AwArD GoEs Toooooooooooooo........

Oh ma GAWd... i didnt noe ACTING was such a freaking hard damn TASK.. ahakz... well i did sum show before but acting and real life show are sooooooo way much more difference...

HAIZZZ.... ma feet,back,hands,head almost ma whole body are aching... the sun was cruel to us just now casue we were bathing with our own sweats while duin our short clips...

KHAI simply BRAG about being the better one in acting than me.. WATEVER... cause i simply haf to reshoot about 4 times for ma stupid EMO part.. well wat ayu say is true.. im such a happy person and its so damn difficult to act opp of wat u are.. HAH...

i guess the nicest part shd be the escalator part AND GAWD DAMN IT.. ma cameraman ar... aiyooooooooooo..

That was the hardest part to shoot as the sun dun give mercy to us and i nearly faint of the heat.. and POOM...

the scene was overlap by other scene.. lucky ar he ma SMALL TITI.. if notttttttt.... ;)

well overall we did well i guess... of course pictures are taken everiwhere.. it will be up soon.. but promises are meant to be broken.. MUAHAHHA...

but its kinda of cool u noe to shoot for a video clip cause we dun need any SCRIPT at all...

HAH...

went to chalet for a while before heading home.. DAMN im broke...

DAMN FREAKING BROKE...

im so gona kick this habit of guin home late and take CAB...

IM REALI AM...

gawd ma stomach are so empty now.. HUNGER PAIN are so unbearable but im sooooooo lazi to even step out...

i didnt noe that the news struck u GUYS totally... but no worries..

DECISION haf not be made and wise thinkings are still pending...

so im HERE as long as there's no PROOF of DECLARATION yet..

lets forget it and enjoy our young daes.. i lurf u too DEAR bubu...

me and alif apply for a job at nus.. WHY not NTU?? hah.. why?? well hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm...

hope we get it and see how the werk plc is like.. if it's sucks well so long and GOODBYE...

Gona catch a movie 2dae and HEY movie outings are soooooo fun...

BEEN thinking alot and u noe wat guys?? sumtimes if things are in ur hands,u are the master of ur decision and wld haf to put it into action wen the ryte time comes... there's no tyme to lose... dun give a damn about the authority surrounded... but for me im still so SCARED to put the decision to USE... cause REJECTION is sumthing i wld nvr cld handle it WELL...

oh well.. WISE thinkings are always useful peeps..

ANGRY at sum peeps who just dun haf the FUCK to tell others of the wrongduings...

Wat are MOUTH for?? WAt are hands FOR? dun noe the diff?? than FUCK off and just ROT...

since cursing ur own FRENS haf been ur way of LIFE why not try the idea of CURSING ur own FAMILY??

it'll be fun u NOE since u lurf the act OF cursing so MUch SHITHEADS>...

NITESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS...

.................................................................................................................................................

"New Year's Project"

Your hands didnt move

well neither did mine.

New Years will bring

so much to say

but nothing comes out right

both of us left without words

both of us lost in this world

it's softer than ever before.

And you were the out

line

of everything you would become.

The keeper of these hands.

To hold you now

it is a far cry more than anything that I deserve.

I'm waiting to give you whatever the world may bring

I'd give you my life

cause I don't own anything

It seemed like the bottom was all that I had until now

I'd give you my life

if you'd give me yours somehow

Your hands didn't move

well neither did mine

New Years will bring me to you.

I'm waiting to give you whatever the world may bring

I'd give you my lifecause I don't own anything.

It seemed like the bottle was all that I had until now

I'd give you my life

if you'd give me yours somehow.

(* how i wish things aren't so COMPLICATED like this...*)

2005-04-04T08:05:00.000-07:00

...BoReD To DeAtH...

WOW... im bored... well im always am bored whenever im in the HOUZ for one whole dae...

Well lesson was cancelled 2dae and MA grp cant proceed wit the mtv projek due to sum circumstances..

Well wanted to hang out but im just sooooo plain lazi to get ma arss out of the bed... im so sori mel i cant join u guys cause m plain laziiiiiii... haha.. and yet i dare to whine im freaking bored...

Im so hating drama or movie that are indulged in SEX everytime.. oh well.. ppl might think im weird but dont SEX supposed to be enjoy btwn 2 souls who love each other and are vowed to each other for life and are done privately ?????... oh god... i noe im the most outguin and OPEN kinda of gerl that ppl mite haf met but sure enuff i till haf boundaries btwn ME and thpse SICK stuff...

AND true enuff sumtimes im SICK and pissed OFF wen sum of ma classmates tok BAOUT those sick stuff...

well as usual syikin admits what she dun likes... thats why i think ma besties is the bEST GUY fren any gerl wld want to haf... his sensitive towards gerls feelings and noe where the boundaries of the joke will be at..

I JUST LURF the way god make him into... indeed evri human species are special in their own way but not those sick hard up PEEPS who maybe haf little attention towards the opp sex.. and trust me sex or sweet talkings dun do FOR ME..

Unless im TOTALY his and that will do the stuff...hehz..

IM SICK of ma life now.. i just cant wait to make ma own decision in life and control ma kinda of living style...

i wld be the most happiest WOMAN ard cause i dun like to take things hard in LIFE...

i wld make the best of wat ma life offer me and wld make it the best moments wen im still here to make it happens..

THANX mummy for finally agree to pay ma last bits of THE FREAKING HP TERMINATION BILLS...

thanx for the $145..

but A BIG HUG AND KISSES to dad who did the job of pscyhoing(pardon the spelling aite) ma mum..

i NEED a hair cut...

FINALLY i get ma rooster back and im werking this sat and sun..

AND WEll im still gona hate ma surpervisor for treating me this way...

BUT TILL now i wont give a FUCK about him unless he needed the FUCKING tight slap FRM ME...

learn kicboxing for nuthing yar noe...

at LONG last ma bestie gona be back home every single dae now... his mum wld be rejoicing cause he the onli DICK in the houz.. muahahhaah.. MUM boy whom i ADORED soooooooo much....

but well i want to attend his pass out parade but HEY i think i haf to make it a pass...

1stly= i end school at 6 but i noe that"s not gona be the main reason cause im the queen PONTENG...

well im just SHy of being ard his family even though his family is such a big hearted families whom u lurf being ard..

oh well maybe i just lurf the praises that his mum and sis wld always throw at ME.. ;)

but than again sure enuff theres gona be thousands of humans present especially whiny mum who miss their son SOOOOOOOOO freaking much...

and i dun like crowds u see.. and i hate being alone in crowded places and hate being LOST of not KNOWING where to go...

so there you go....

well i noe he gona be at least disappointed cause im sure he feel PROUD like a pig if im there...

but as i quote earlier on HE"S such a wonderful species that he wont mind me give it a pass knowing ma situation.. he noe what best for me.. LURF U MONKEY BRAINS...

AND i seriously gona think of wat do to after i graduate cause most job that are offer to me SUCKS big tyme.. i swear im such a choosy picky WOMAN... i just lurf the word woman rather than lady... haha....

i rather werk in sumwhere i lurf being in and lurf duin it no matter how low the pay is rather than duin sumthing i detest and suffer even though how high the pay is.. like i say i JUST want to make myself happy and enjoy everything i do to bits....

LOVE urself before happily declaring u LOVE others.. that is so HYPOCRITE... muahaha...

haizz talking about love i noe this couple who cheat on each other but declare they ARE SO IN LOVE cause both dun noe a fuck about wat happen.. we as their frens OF COURSE know the shitz...

well gd luck ar eh.. well u two reali need each other no matter what caus eno ONE giva a fUCK about u guys... MUAHAHAHA... kol me wat u like im just happy FOR THEm...

OK IM HUNGRY and mummy ayam pedas todae rock ma socks..(ma new phrase)

and i eaten 4 piece of that wonderful junk..

and im gona gobble up the remaining 2 wings left as u noe i hate drumstick...

ADIOZZZZZZZZZZZZZ.......

and hey spanglish is fun and cool but if u hate long winded stuff like ME than make it a pass ok..

cause i haf terrible headche after the show cause it's truly LONG -WINDED.... ;)

2005-04-02T11:03:00.000-08:00

....AwEsOmE....

2dae outing was FUN.. 1stly i LOVE MA BESTIE... i love him and wld give him ma life for anything..

i regret being with that fucker ex bf of mine until we fite and we distance so MUCH..

i wld cry now if u were to stroke me to sleep like u always do last tyme...

i MISS YOU AND ALWAYS WILL... ;)

1stly went out with yan and him.. as usual that irritating gf of yan always control that poor soul.. stupid minah.. lucky i ur bf is a very gd fren of mine if not i wld kick ur butt...

than we mit another fren of ours and his gf.. well sorie if i nvr tok much with ur gf.. well it seems weird lah that we schoolmates and nvr even smile before and suddenly she's there... but well she sweet.. no worries.. just a bit cocky.. muahahah..

than meet tweet and faliq for a while before heading down to...................................... MARCHE.......

COOL LAH.... i ate the calamari fritti and the CARAMEL BANANA CREPES WITH ICECREAM.. WOWNESSS.. i give it 10/10 lah..

NICE and sweet just like me ok...

faizal,mel and leha join us...........

well credit goes to ma dearest MEL... she the bestest gf i wld dare to say i HAF... she understands me ... well she hate me at 1st but we are so close NOW...she's getting engaged and decided to treat us just now... pity yan he couldnt join in cause the bitch decided to stir an argument and he haf to left us early wit the bitch..

to LEHA and MEL.. seriously... i was not lying wen i say u 2 are the onli gf's now i haf that i truly can connect with and always laughing with.. even though we rarely hang out but we gossip endlessly and laugh like our own place.. WELL WE WERE IN OUR OWN WORLD... truly u guys make me feel like a newborn LADY..

i learn how to be one with u guys.. ma feminine side slowly appear whenever im with u gals..

and we wld even laugh at harsh jokes cause as we all noe we DUN FUCKING CARE....

haha ok back to marche.. ma bestie was smiling like hell cause its was his 1st tyme eating there.. and u all noe that the eating procedure is cool and a bit funny he keep on smiling everytime i teach him.. why?? cause he say i wld not stop yakking even though telling the simplest thing.. HAHHAA since wen syikin stop talking??

haha...without any paiseh and like usual super miss confident, i order the banana crepes at the veg stall..

BODOH... muahaaha.. the cute chinese guy wldnt stop laughing at me.. well i guess the whole marche wil laugh at me... well i was so busi toking to alfie on the fon busi gossiping and i dun even look at the store name... MUAHHAAH... bodoh syikin.. haf been always...

and GUYS dun ever watch 3 IRON.. well if u are an artistic person and who lurves mind games well this movie is all URS... lucky im curious as a cat cause thats what make me awake all the while cause i badly waiting for the actress and the actor to talk... but at last the actress onli say 'I LOVE U".. cool shit huh?? well NOT...

hahah... after the midnite movie we went back and dearest bf of mel sent us home..

its more COOL SHITE riding in his vehicle.. WOWNESS...

i reali2222 enjoy ma dae just now.. nvr did i expect its gona turn out this way.. i truly am HAPPY..

its been a while i ever enjoy all this.. and thanx to all of u who TREAT me..

thanx for treating me like a SMALL KID... well like i say..

Im like the big sister wen with ma schoolmates but outside i will always be pamper and will always be the small kid in ma bestie and our frens eyes...

I wld never trade him with anything else even MONEY.. why cause he just the bestfren that u need...

his everything... i even tell him that wen both of us are married it will be fun living 2gather... well he opposed as usual saying it wld be hell... HAHA...

ok im reali freking tired.. didnt sleep last nite cause we did our projek again...

well im still smiling now cause i just haf THE GREATEST FLIRT OF ALL TIMES.... muahhah...

why must he be nice with me wen he's not on ma mind but seem nowhere to be found wen i miss his smiles??

Why must he get me excited wen i dun even think about it but again he let me down wen i thgt of the excitement..

seriously wen can i ever find out WAT haf been on his mind all the tymes.... he's the onli guy who keep me wondering,keep me excited keep me thinking and keep me happy with just his sweet smiles for the dae....

well maybe we are just not meant to be... maybe he's just playing ard.. maybe he's confused or maybe he's just

not ma mr BRIGHTSIDE..it's juat a wishful thinking probaly....

to ma dear bubu, im glad u are fine now and smiling.. im sad to see ma dear bubu looking helplessly SAD and WEAk.. Hope u make it up and are enjoying ur tyme 2gather..

i wld always be here for yar as always.... remeber?? smile now and no worries dear.. ;)

PS* finally get ma thirteen senses cd.. its selling at 17.95 now.. FINALLY it drop frm the freaking 34 bux... expensive sia..

trust me.. they rocks ma socks... ;)

2005-03-28T07:19:00.000-08:00

......WaT A FuCkeD Up WoRlD.....

(PS: DUN blardi read ma blog if u cant accept such a FUCKED up language)

Lately things are just pissing me off.... This is wen i wld lose ma anger and wld just bang maself against the wall..

1stly it haf to be the fucking police who haf to waste ma bloody fucking tyme.. FUCked u are not even a REAL police u fucked up shithead... WHY.. well he blardi hell noe i werk there and he can just fucking let me in noeing i haf the fucking company record... but he fucking lazi to ans for that and he say im the fucked up lazi pig... wat the FUCK??? And he just fucking throw ma fucking IC straight to ma face.. hey u FUCKING GAY....

u think u look so Fucking wonderful or YUMMYlicious that u haf to be fucking ARROGAnt?? well listen here u fucking GAY u look no better than the fucking mah bow tan(the fucking minister with big black specs) and u haf to brag like u one of the best gd looking GUYS there... HEY fucker u dun even haf the authority to arrest the fucking ppl here and u act like one big shot?? i noe u fucking sad about ur fucking ugly face and ur fucking unwanted appearences but hey GOD gif u all that cause the mighty ones noe that u fucker are one hell of a mother fucking JERK....

I SWEAR UR WHOLE FAMILY WILL HAF THE FUCKED UP FACE so they will get TEASE CAUSE THEY LOOK LIKE A FUCKED UP RETARDED....

i swear i wld fucking slap ur FUCKED up face if i ever see YOU again...

And I WLD EVEN DARE to put up ur fucking face in the gay section which even the fucked up gay wld PUKE at the sight of ur fucking fucked up FACE>> GET IT??

WAT THE HELL.. like i say MOST police man in singapore are FUCKING corrupted.. i swear i wld SLAP any police guy noW who dare to FUCKING mess up with ME...

And u noe wat i fucking hate the fucking fucked UP INDIANS...

wELL kill ME IF U WANT PPL... LABEL ME AS racicts OR WAT SO EVER but I HAF ENUFF OF THIS FUCKED UP PPL WITH THE FUCKED UP ATTITUDE...

I so AGRRE with who so ever saying that the FUCKED up malay and indians wen they hold higher authority than us they blardi gif us the fucked up life with their fucked up snobbish attitude...

U NOE WAT?? i regret being asian now... how i wish i'm BLARDI FUCKING white rite now AND I WILL HAPPILY DECLARE IM A FUCKED UP RACISTS... bravo...

Well and MA FUCKED UP DUMB supervisor haf to fucking add the anger in ME... he cancel ma schd for the whole week AND gif me the fucked up reason that i dun haf the fucked up pass to enter.. hey u blardi fucking motherfucker....

DUN U NOE I WERK HERE LONGER THAN YOU AND I FUCKING CAN HAF MA PASS IN JUST ONE DAE U FUCKED UP CHINESE APEK WHO WANA ACT LIKE SUM FUCKED UP HENDSOME DUDE??

Well NO WONDER UR FUCKING chinese wife left u cause i guess u just fucked up lazi and UGLI... now i guess u are FUCKING HAPPY CAUSE FINALLY u got a fucking malay minah as ur wife who fucking encourage u WITH UR FUCKED UP PLAN.. u noe wat>> IF I EVER GET HOLD OF UR FUCKED UP CHILD I WLD GLADLY SOLD HER/HIm at e-bay for a fucking millions to hold me to the end of MA FUCKING LIFE...

HOW I WISH.....

he such a loser to kol up ma manager for back up.. u noe wat??? i blardi gona sabotage u BADLY U FCUKED UP FUCKER...

im gona make u pee in ur pants and make u shit rite infront of us ASKING US FOR A BLARDI FUCKING APOLOGY FOR WAT U HAF done u FUCKED UP SON OF A PIG...

i FUCKING NEED A GUN to shoot rite into ma fucking fucked up brain NOWWWWWWWWW...

i just cant take it with all this FUCKED UP THINGS THAT HAPPENING IN TEH FUCKED UP WORLD....

"Where is the ever so sweet syikin?""

OHH u fucked up ppl... dun ever ask.. ASK this fucked up world if our fucked up life haf ever been fucking FAIR...

the ever so sweet thingy is lost due to THE FUCKED UP DISEASE...

i seriously need a fucking break before i lose ma fucked up BRAINS...

1stly IT"S THE FUCKED UP FRENS

2nd it's THE fucked up ppl now its the FUCKED UP WERk..

SOOTHE ME DOWN AS U CAn but i fucking gona retaliate at any fucked up peeps who dare to fucked up irritate me now...

SOON u wld see me in THE FUCKED UP JAIL IF this fucked brain of mine is not properly secured and settle cause i wld fucked up KILL any fucker withy any fucked up weapon anytime NOW...

DISS me if u want, LEAVE me if u want, KILL me if u want, BEAT me up if u want, SHOOT me if u want, IGNORE me if u want cause all i NOE is that...........

oh well THIS is just a FUCKED up world after all...

And the FUCKED UP miss SINGAPORE UNIVERSE making me FUCKING nauseous CAUSE of their fucking fake fucked up smiles and fucked up face...

SINGAPORE=DUHHHHHHHHHH... sucha a fucked up loser and POSER whereas they always fucking copy the fucking fucked up MODERN countries and end up USING a huge amount of a fucked up sum... they SHD JUST donate it to THE NEEDY and let this ppl live in a fucking FAIR country...

oh god forgive me for all this outrage behaviour but as ur slave i gladly declare that i dun reali haf the courage to face all the unwanted and bend roads of ma JOURNEY towards LIFE....

2005-03-26T22:55:00.000-08:00

......Shopping Spree.....

Well..... AT LAST.... i managed to SHOP... haha.. wat did i buy hmmmmmmmmmm...

A black bead necklace=$50

2 cool t-shirts=$78

Skirt=$60

????=$150( I WONT TELL CAUSE WAIT MA FRENS ALL kill ME)

altogether=$338..

ma GOODNESS....

hehz.. but i dun feel GUILTY at all cause i been saving up these past few mths and im sick of watching ma account had dozens of $$ but i dun noe wat to do..

but i still haf sum savings aite... well im soooooo hapi cause ma hp bill this mth onli sum up to$35 bux.. overused it by 3 bux.. WTH... never ever in ma life ma bill was that little... always 70 and above ....

kuddos to ME... and i haf settle the termination line which i use under ma ex bf name... HOORAY...

no more bills for me except for that pathetic amount of $35 last mth... huahuahuahua.. im free of BILLS gawd damn it...

thats why i haf loads to spare this tyme round...

ma pay plus allowance plus *magic*huahua u noe i noe...

i gladly say im not gona be broke again...

even bought mum her fav renoma tote bag which onli available at AIRPORT and she was gleaming with excitement.. FREE mestilah..

AND yar... ma COMP is anti-freaking VIRUS now... wow... dad paid a huge amount for that cause he's sick of his loveble daughters scream to him for help everytime our comp shut down by itself... MUAHAHAH....

and it's super cool u noe.. all our programs haf been updated.. im using xp proffesional now instead of the normal xp HOME...

ma winamp is so supercool that i feel like im in a gig itself wen watching live performances... due to the sound effects.. WAHAHAH....

And ma cute anti virus comp will tell me whose comp is not protected everytime wen they chat with me on msn.. almost all are not PROTECTED... wahahaaha... ma comp SUPER aksyen siak like me.. EGOZZ......

ok ok.. no more of shutting down itself AGAIn....

lazi sia wana werk 2dae but wth??

im gona earn loads of money 2dae and...............

of course to spend it lah...

2005-03-25T23:31:00.000-08:00

.........RawKiNg Gd Tyme.........

Chalet was Cool and Fun... i haf Fun they haf FUn we all haf Fun....

ma fav part haf to be the ghost story session(where me,khai,tweet curl up like a ball under the blanket wen they try to kol the spirits), Grooming session( where i try to find diff hair styles for the guys b4 khai showing all he got), and last not least where me khus,tweet,inn wrap fad up as a corpse and leave him in the dark room all alone... after that he gif me the "bitchy attitude" cause he say im the MASTERMIND whereas im not.. hehz...

All was fun and it goes out well.. The chalet was such a short notice but we as the HOST did Great i guess...

:) pics are up and feel free to browse thru.. CAUTION sum pics are Hilarious so beware aite..

on the 1st nite i managed to sleep after the nd guys shut up and all was silence.. but HEY thast not it... i thgt FINALLY sleep.... BUT than there was this loud PIG SNORE as khai face was directly beside mine and his NOSE was directly BESIDE MA EARS and HE snore like a PIG....I swear i feel like killing him and faliq who both corny and SNORE the loudest...FIR and ME was the VICTIM of the nite...

The suckiest part haf to be the getting up early to check out and saying gd bye...

haha...

Well the next HOlidae...

I plan guin to Sibu island with the PEEPS...

but rite NOW the one who SET for the idea.. me khai and tweet... hope the others make up their mind...

hope me faliq and fir plan to go bali on the 8th mth this yr work out as well...

Quite sad ITE daes are soon Over....

CAUSE i enjoy ma life there...

rOMANCE,friendship,fights all were GD...

gona MISS these daes....

I bet everione gona MISS ite DAES as we haf freedom and all....

maybe a handful of them wld say it SUX cause THEY dun haf what we all haf..

"winks"

Well im fresh as NEVER cause i sleep yesterdae at 9am until todae 2 pm.. yare MAN.. im such a PIG.. hey 2daes of not sleeping.. wat do u expect..

LASTLY.....

HAPI BERFDAE to the MARCH BABIES......

Well why i wish them?? Cause the onli two ever special ppl which i EVER fall in love with gona turn 20/23 this mth..

Haf a wonderful journey in life and i MISS those tymes with u guys...

*mUACKS*...

2005-03-23T01:01:00.000-08:00

.......MOE SUCKS and lets PARTY BABE......

Y sux?? cause stupid MOE did not handle this FUCKING problem properly...

WHYZ?? cause theres alot of ppl passing O levels this yr and schools are cutting the cut off points so LOW... nb cb... IT which usually the cut off point is as high as 26 are now being cut as low as 16.... CAN u BELIEVE that?? wtf?? well why im mad cause there's are loads of countless poor helpless souls out there who didnt manage to get in to any school... FUCk... waste their tyme study rite??

and that's involve ma lil SIS... IM mad ok.. she did quite well and fair for her o's.. she get 20 points and are eligible for any kind of courses... SO much to choose... but in the end NONE were givenn.. HOW PAINFUL is that??

NOT even i choice out of the 12 choices submitted.. FUCKERS... she has high hopes and poor her.. she badly wanted to study and THIS haf to happen...

if her points sux han its ok but it's consider FAIR and WELL.. NB CB..

SHE"S onli interested in life sciences and IT stuff.. and this haf to happen.. LIFE scicens haizz no need to say... their cut off points is oredi so low and they cut off until 13 points.. cb... that one straight a ppl than can go lah.. nb....

well ma sis is stuck.. those courses that she wanted are all full... or either the cut of points are oredi so freaking LOW...

IN the end we go and apply IT at republic poly.. well thats oso depends on luck...

NB CB... not that she look down on RP she haf her reason... SHE is such a HARDworking and ambitious gerl.. unlike me i noe.. hehz...

and u noe wat the staff down there say?? ma sis badly wanted bio chemical and the staff say why not apply for higher nitec for the new bio chemical processing course??

WAH... that HOT me siak... stupid..... SHE PASS ok and SHE got 20 FREAKING point and u ask her to go ITE??

once again im not looking down cause im ma ownself are frm ite... BUT i dun want ma sis to go thru wat i haf been thru... her FUTURE is so freaking bright and im scared guin ite just dampers her HOPES and HIGH ambitions and she mite not take it too well and mite even lost interest.. thats how ambitious ma SIS is..

NB CB... why isit haf to be when ma lil sis tyme?? she did us proud and now this haf to happen to HER.. she was so sad and depress wen she did not get any of her choices... i pity her siak.. she STUDY SO HARD NB..... haizzz..... i hope she get a place at rp and if not i wont let her continue this yr... i ask her to wait for nxt yr... and she as ambitious as ever thgt of retaking her o's back as she feel that her result is not gd enuff...

SEE MOE?? WAT HAF U DONE?? ma sis thgt that getting 20 points is freaking low and she

even wanted to RETAKE...

ok ... forget about it...

todae im guin to ma hommies chalet and haf fun...

well most probally i wld be sleeping though cause im so freaking tired.. hehz...

get ma pay and did sum shopping wit mum and dad and ma sis just now....

sumthing was missing though cause OUR PRECIOUS baby bro is at school....

haizzz......

MISS him... haizz nvm... enjoy AR....

HAPPY GD FRIDAY PPL....

2005-03-20T08:07:00.000-08:00

.......I CHANGED........

Well 1stly im sooooooooo sorie to say harsh words or unwanted stuff at ma previous post.. i got REPRIMANDED by ma frens who noes me since ages and they say i was not this ASSHOLE b4.. i guess they were rite.. guin ITE and mit the wrong kind of ppl can CHANGED you... im so sorie i didnt mind ma worsd and control ma anger like i was before and wen i was still a sweet gerl to u all.... well ppl changed and ME obviously the environment ard me CHANGED me...

They were mad cause instead of losing it out i shd be calm like always and it's not so MEEEEEEEEE to get so irritated and scold all un nice words ard ppl...

BUt than again like i say I HAF TO....

but even that they still love me and even tell me where i go worng.. they dun side me BLINDLY even though they noe me for ages.... but sadly sum ppl do even wen they onli noe the person for a few daes,mths or yrs...

BUT for all of this im still the same syikin who haf been a lunatic since birth..:)

OK i promise ma dear bestie not to get so aggro again.. I will do it for him...

cause i heart him the most...

ok im at werk now... gona run before they run me down AGAIN.. stupif fucking PLACE.. opsss sorie..

2005-03-19T22:16:00.000-08:00

.....LoSeRs AiNt FoR Me.....

1STLY, i'm so sori to ma kids if all this shytes start frm ME.... well obviously IN the 1st place i dun give a fuck wen they kol me a BITCH or BITCHING ard behind ma back.. Cause it just sumthing that happen again and again... but ma frens are gd BUDDIES they CARE and WILLING to fight for ME.. GOD BLESS THEM... ma life was normal and peaceful until i MEET THEM...

even if there were fights in any part of ma growing up journey it's not as BAD as now.. we overocme it and lead on with our life.. but now unless school over OUR life will be a fucking mess..

ppl complain and ppl get angry over wat others wrote in their blog.... well haf we all 4get that OUR BLOG= OUR FREEDOM of speech.... unless we say names than onli u can ATTACK us... but when names are not there WHY TERASA?? it's so obvious u the bad man in the story..

well im not making the fight here more worse.. OUR limits and TOLORENCE are beyond over everytime u make a scene..

Why we nvr make any noise wen noeing that UR post is for anione of uss and why YOU start kolling everione wen either one of us wrote sumthing that u think is for YOU in our post?? where is THE bRAIN?? or maybe u nee frens to be ON UR SIDE HUH??

We haf never ever influence others about wat we feel about YOU ALL.. WE even try to think of others who close with you as not to mention bad stuff about YOU infront of him/her..

YOU all are so good at bitching ARD....

AND SUM PPL who dun even noe us start to say bad things about us and like usual they are the ones now closer to you.. there were once YOU say they were REJECTS but now... HAH..

And tothose who dun even noe wt HAPPEN and onli HEARD one side of the story FUCK OFF... i wld SLAP ur face if i haf too and I WLD just punch ur FUCKING skinny or fat or BLACK body okey.. i dun give a FUCK no more.. just come to ma face if u think THIS is for U KEPO FUCKERS .. i wld gladly show u ma other side of friendlyness... SHITHEADS..

well WE haf to TALk and thats it's.... but i dun understand they always kol either one of our frens if there's a misunderstanding..

GET THIS CLEAR....

i no longer hide it.... all the tyme either one of you ty to kol us.. we wERE ALL THERE...

all will be pissed off everytime ur num appears... cant u get it???

WE ALL DUN WANT YOU GUYS ANIMORE... understand???

CANT U ALL GET THE HINTS FRM LAST TYME??

why we nvr ask you out and try to run away frm u guys???

CAUSE we dun want U to spoil our FUN....

hah.. i said it....

WE DUN WANT U AS OUR FRIENDS SO STOP DISTURBING US AND GO AWAY...

ok thanx.. we will talk aite... there so much i wana spit or opps wana tell u in the face..

WHO now dun haf FRIENDS and always want ppl to SIDE WITH them???

HAIZZZZZZZZZZ.....

...................................................................................................................................................................

Ok.....fri we did our projects at ayu SUPER FUCKING RICH fren houz... gawd damn it... we were all excited...

didnt managed to finish it until it way past midnite so we stay for the NIGHT there.. watch long tyme dae on this huge freaking screen or isit wall?? and alif FREAK out as usual.. FIR is ma witness...

I wld HAPPILY gave ma gratitute to KHAI cause he was freaking tired after the auditions at ite tamp and he jolly well noe he haf a long dae the next dae(photoshoot in the morning& werk after that) but still he was in his best active mode for the video..

he even stay the night wioth us and didnt get any sleep.... GOD BLESS HIM... see it shows if u REALI lurves werking with the grp and AGRRE with the ideas we all present we will haf LOADS of fun...

BUT one thing for sure... getting khai into his serious acting mood was DIFFICULT... he will always end up duin stupid act and crack us up... even fir our videoman cldn't control and haf to laugh noeing he haf to handle the video seriously... maybe khai more suited in the comedy scene......well I was assigned to help editing the video with alif.. MAYBE this tyme the small kid can teach me sum SKILLS...... THANX to everione who helps us making the video....

even to hanis(ayu bf) who become our food management... THANX dude...

Well all of us cant wait for the chalet... IT will be more peaceful and fun than our other chalet that haf been HELD.. ;) so yup.... all will be great with oi one to rule us.. WE all can do anyting FREELy... YEAY...

2005-03-16T07:42:00.000-08:00

.......CuTeNeSs.......

1stly, ALIF FIR AND TWEET owe ma a thank you tribute in their blog.. wat happen?? ask them aite...

well i oso wana THANX them for accompanying me to ma tennis lesson which i think is very GOOD of them but i guess it must come with a price rite GUYS?? ahakz...

one thing for sure *a millionaire haf a million BESTFREIND* get it?? if not haizzz u just plain stupid.. haha..

But i can vouch that these 3 of them are simply pure and sincere at heart but at least 10% comes with a price.. hehz...

but still i will always be grateful to ma frens who went to a distance for others cause they are those with passion and HEARTS... SUM ppl wld realise that the most ppl they look down or not cool enuff will soon be their onli FRENS wen ppl are GONE.. HAH...

BLESS them...

how i wish that ma buds are interested in sports and WE wld rock the whole court sia...

but too bad they more interested looking at the gerls run rather than looking at how they play.... haizzz..

i miss last lesson and im bad at BACKHAND... im still trying improving on ma front hand and it's get better each tyme... just need the hang of it.. and playing TENNIS u haf to be vain.. u haf to posses the IMAGE in court cause ppl look forward to the style of playing rather than the skill of playing... nb..

if i had known i wld just stick to netball and floorball.. u can be at ur worst and roughest behaviour and ppl wont care... all they care is the GOALS...

HAIZZZZZZZ... VAIN GAME... no wonder so expensive sia... but well at least i haf the chance to accquire the skill...

One of ma fren get frustated with his group cause they dun understand and dun haf the communication at all... worst of all they are BOSSY.. HAIZzzz.... but than again it's no surprise cause i jolly well knew it .... haha.. POOR YOU....

im so glad i get the bestest group of all i guess...

werking with these ppl that u HAPPY with and COMFORTABLE with things will always sail smoothly even though we all noes that we wld be the worst grp of all wen werking together... but still being COMFORTABLE and ENJOYING ur grp pressence wld always be the success of every werk done... even though the mark is poor but at least we manage to pull it together as a team.. that's wat matter the most... achievements of marks can always be obtained anytime but achievement in FRIENDSHIP.... u mite nvr even achieve THAT..... so once come grab and give it all out rather than later, make a fool, lose it and REGRET... haizz... im such a professor todae...

well slept at 4 yesterdae cause i was so engrossed watching national geographic channel.. im such a fan now...

watching the terrorist hijacking the plane was scary and watching interpol investigation make ma wana be part of the team... it's weird wen sumone who make a mistake can get away for as long as 20 yrs... but still NOTHING is complicated as what it seem...

there loads more to it than just meet the eye...

im so CONFUSED... there so many things i wana do after i graduate...

Guin NAFA was the 1st choice cause i noe it wld be freaking easy for me to sail in but than 4yrs is freaking long and $30 000 IS NOT CHEAP SIA......

This is me.. i always wanted succes in a shorter tyme which is so the IMPOSSIBLE...

i'm not ready to haf a full tyme job cause i still havent achieve ma goals and ambition...

even though how LAZI or how STUPID i mite seem but than again u are wrong... so wrong....

cause i wld do anything and all out for sumthing i WANT...

in these case i want a future that i lurf duin it and so i haf to werk HARD...

now i noe how important it is to haf a full 5 credits cert for o levels... it give you the freedom of choices for ur future and HELL yar i noe these feeling wld come one dae... REGRET......

but than life go on and no point looking back... i shd look forward now and be happy and content in what i haf now...

HOLIDAES is COMING and CHALET is on the way too... no matter what happens i will enjoy the stay there cause i pay a freaking 30 bux...

ma bestie guin australia nxt yr ryte away after he ORD_O... he was reali keen and the clan haf been saving money so hard sia wen they onli earn 350 per mth...

OF COURSE im gona be part of it... wohooo... like old tymes... haizzz miss that...

i pass the chance to go gold coast with ma "on the block kids" cause hey... IM SCHOOLING ASSHOLES...

stupid... nvr plan properly but its ok.... i noe wat it's like in gold coast so im not that sore though...

ok im blabbering so much now that i nd a break or ma finger will break.. WOW that rhymes.. haha check out tweet tag board and u noe wat i mean..

HIGHLIGHT OF THE DAE: ....... is a man that look's like a pEN..

wonder where he got all that frm...

2005-03-14T07:11:00.000-08:00

.......U KiDs SuCks......

U noe wat?? i typically lurves holidaes.. BUT if onli it's applies to me... cause u noe wat?? holidaes for the sec and pri kiddos SUX big tymes... cause why?? ARGHHHHHHHHHHHH....

I HATE IT WEN MA OTHER TWO FAT OBNOXIOUS COUZINS CUM here and play the xbox wit ma bro cause they FREAKING IRRITATING AND THEY SUX...

WHY OH WHY??

they been here practically the whole dae and it's 11 plus now.. dun their mum and dad teach them manners to stay away frm ppl houz wen nites FALL...

not that i dun like them i simply HATE THEM.... see the diff??

haizzz... they are so freaking irritaing just like their PARENTS... i guess they just haf that freaking irritating GENES huh?? damn it...

they are FAT,UGLY,IRRESPONSIBLE,DIRTY,IRRITATING& SHITHEADS.....

wonder how the father a so called ustaz(blueak...) managed too raise these ill brats...

sorie but than again i just HATE themm... pure and simple... sincerely frm ma heart.. awwww...

oh well... i just irritated cause ma bro are so close to them and he mite be just like THEM.. i dun mind ma freaking thin bro to grow fat but i dun want him to go ard without MANNERS and RESPONSIBILITY....

i heart him more than anything but it just ache me to see mine baby bro become so illmanered..

he dares to disobey ma mum and he even kol ma dad BODOH...

and u noes who he learn frm.. helll yar that two FUCKING FATTYS...

SCREW THEM...and to add the burning anger in me they are one of the family which i HATE to the core.. AND GUESS WAT?? we live in the same block LAH... stupid decision of mum's to move here.. even she regret..

oohhh well i just cant wait to move yar noe.. far away frm these shitheads families.. haha shitheads.. well they love UDANG so maybe they obtained loads of shits frm there.. hahahah...

ok... sch was fine as usual and it's keep burning each moment of the dae.. HAHAHA.. get it??

haizzzzzz... i wish how i wish...

guin to start on our video project and im excited but ma excitement was flush downs with bubu asking me to act in the video clips.. im such a BAD ACTRESS... now is the tyme wen i hate being the onli gerl in the grp...

but for ma own MARKS, im gona do it with professionalism(sp?? arghh watever)...

im soooooooooooo excited cause this sat i mite go SHOPPING...

well it's ones of ma frens berfdaes and we plan to spend ti as GERLS NITES OUT....

how hapi i am.. cause it's such a looooooooooooooooooooooong tyme since im out with gerls... yar man.. just GERLS... and i reali need it... i cant wait to shop like crazee cause hell yar it's been a while man..

im so gona spend hundreds and hundreds of bux...

seriously i just need that tyme out....

its not that i dun enjoy ma buds company but the atmosphere is DIFFRENT if u shop with ur own kind unless i haf a gay fren but NOPE.. none are gay...

these two fabulous ladee are so on to give a makeoover for am wardrobe.. hehz.. but still than u wont find heels,pump shoes, pointed shoes,ladies sandals on the way...

hah.. SNEAKERS wld be just FINE....

and im so gona buy the whole t-shirts in one of the heeren shop..(4get the name ar)

cause their t-shirts are cool and CHEAP...

oh gawd i just cant wait.. haha...

i just turn down a tall,fair,long hair,cute guy just now.. WTH?? am i turning LESBIAN??

i regret now... haizzzzzz... he was cute though..

hah nvm... OUTZZZZZZZZ..

ps:" the fucking fat obnoxious shitheads are still here... nb cb.. now midnite oredi sia.. stupid parents to haf stupid children.."

2005-03-12T09:30:00.000-08:00

..........ToUcHeD..........

A gd dae to hang out...... aww i miss HIM sooo much and was glad to see him at last... swear i cld hug you if not for ur frens.. haha...

Damn.... he lose LOADS of weight... haizzz.... ns=bitch like i say...

he used to be so chubby so FAT but now he so thin and GAWD u look like u lose 20 kilo man...

but still i heart you... gosh.. i was freaking late just now... supposed to meet ma buds at 5.30 but i came ard 7.40.. i noe im such a bitch... sorie guys..:(

because of me we cant watch the movie... no more tix and the next show is at 12.30 which no one wanted to watch at that tyme... HAIZZZZZZZZZ..... i regret miting u guys late cause it seems like we spend a few mins together onli and it's so hard to see them.....

SURPRISINGLY.... one of ma fwen hook up with ma schoolmate and wth??? i mean it's such a small world... hahah... and i was shocked like hell....

dun wori i be nice to ur gf frm now on.. hahah...

well i haf to THANX BUBU alif khus and the others who saved me... haha..

well they all wanted to go clubbing and pester me along... i say no loads of tymes but it seems to be ma fren berfdae and he was pestering me to go and i feel bad saying no loads of tymes.....

Even though ma bestfren tell them that i dun club they still insisted... so i kol bubu up and they say they were on the way to town to mit me and go home with me... how SWEET... heart u ma dear...

so i tell the rest that i miting ma classmates and cant join them.. onli than they let me go... PHEW....

well but i kinda sad to leave ma DEAR bestie cause i MISS him sooooooo much... we were joking ard each other like we are on our first date.. wahhhhh... miss that.. haha...

so i shake his hands and wave him gd bye while he leave with the rest to devils bar.... haizzzzz... wish i cld hug u there... hehz...

so in the end hang out with tweet alif khus and the rest at bk before heading home... overall a nice and touching dae for me.... i like the way he ask me to go home early if possible cause its been a long tyme he reprimand me like that.. simple say I MISS YOU SHITHEAD>>>MUAX>>OUTZ.....

2005-03-11T10:07:00.000-08:00

.........WOW........

im still smilim gtill now cause we make a pile at werk.. haha onli certain ppl noes wat im toking about..

1stly i wld like to thanx all customer of obriens 2dae cause they are not PICKY at all and easy to handle.. and they are freaking generous too...

well todae TIPS was like WOW...

funni lar all this ppl..

well this angmoh lady came to us and ask for 2 piece of plain cause she was sick and kinda of hungri. i pity her so i tell faizal no need to charge this cute lady...

than she say ok and decided to give us tips for being kind... and to my surprise she drop us 3 pounds...

GAWD.. 3 pounds= 9 sing dollars..

She could buy a meal with that...

funni cause we gave her free bread but she gave us more than wat the bread cost... GOD bless you lady... muacks....

than this lady wanted to pay for her cappucino and i saw her taking out 15 dollars so i held ma hand out.. sudenly she just drop the money into the tips box.. thinking that she accidentally drop the money i try to catch it... than she say..."ohh i meant to put that in ur tips box... im paying it in aussie dollars.." ma jaw was hanging wide open but i act cool and continue with the procedure.. after she left i excitedly pull faizal and show him the tips box.. he was like makkau..

hahah... shocked obviously... well there was 2 aussie and more lah...

overall we are satisfied with it... eh hard day pay of ok with sum tips... hehz....

haizzz..... having chalet on the 23rd to 25 but not that anxious and happy actuali... obviously im hapi lah cause can spend tyme with ma beloved classmates but at the same time there sumting i dun reali agree with... well gona tok it out with them on mon... just sumthing that im not comfortable with..

haizzzzzzzzz... yeay gona watch hitch 2morow... i cross ma finger and pray well hoping that HE can make it...

leceh u noe this bratt which i heart the most...

he always haf our plan backfire...

we plan a wk ago suddenly he called saying he mite come a bit later cause he haf tracking tomorow.... WTH?? haiz... ns is truly a BITCH...

well hope he come cause i wont want to spend tyme with yan and his GF... ur socalled BESTFREN.. hahaha.... ok im a bitch.. hehz..

wow im excited just to think about WE gona shopping 2morow and gona eat at fish&co(yucks)

and watch movie... it been such a loooooooooooooooooooong tyme yar noe... haizzz.....

i got a terrible headache now... serve me rite for getting a lift from a bad driver...

he SPEED all the way and i was clinging onto ma life... faizal was shouting like sum auntie frm behind... haha...

well but cool... if onli everidae he can fetch us and send us home... WOW......

spare me frm waiting like HELL for our company cab...

mum urging me to take car license but wel SYIKIN=LAZI as usualy...

lazi sia wana take theory lah if fail retake again lah... haizzz... SIAN...

ok.... got two new guys at ma werk place and one unfortunately haf to be sumone i detest the most... he's none other than ma fren younger bro....

his brother is ma gd fren but HE... never... he such a pain in the ass....

im so gona kill him if he ever give me any problems u stupid GIGI....

and ma supervisor.. haiz.... his stupidness blooms as dae pass....

he soooo STUPID that i can kill him anytime..

arghhhhhhhhhhh... im swear im gona quit ma job as soon as i can...

so what if im the oldest and get the most iniative but i haf to endure all this shit frm THEm..

seriously i will kill ma supervisor if i haf the chance.... and i will kidnap his cute baby so he wont grow up becoming so stupid and UGLY like the FATHER...

hahahaahahaah..... to hell with you...

ok im sleepi... nitessssssssssssss

2005-03-07T09:26:00.000-08:00

........I can't SLEEP........

Seriously im freaking lazi to update but i just cant SLEEP and i haf nuthing better to do.. NB.. 2morow lesson start at 8 and i always haf difficulties in sleeping everitime i haf to wake up early in the morning the next dae.. Must be sum curse...

Sumthing weird happen.. this stupid old man came up to me and keep saying..."remember me?? i remember you.. u the gerl with brown eyes..."

WTF?? i dun even noe HIM... everione was shocked... but if that man happen to be sum hunks OBVIOUSLY i wld say yar i remember you too.. wahaha... CRAPS....

DAD.. haizz bought his NEW hp again... he bought the new nokia flip fon.. the one that u can rotate the screen... cool crap but its freaking bulky... oh GAWD... plssssssss help ma dad of his hp PHENONMENAL... rather give me the money to spend dear dad.. hehz....

sis got her hp and im using it for a while.. haha i noe im bad.. im always the JAKUNS ones here...

and im so gona KILL that FREAKING khai... i haf two bruise due to his freaking stupid pinches... nb... u noe wat... one more tyme and thats it... i will kick his balls and send him down to his knees...

i noe i fierce... thanx ar...

HELPPPPPPPPPPPPPP... i wana sleep badly but i cant... maybe gona ask mummy to help me buy sleeping pills..

but like aunty2 sia eat sleeping pills...

gona catch HITCH this sat... at LAST...

ohhh i cant wait... miz ma buds too much...

NS=SUCKS......

heeee im glad i dun haf to go thru that... but at the same tyme it wld be a cool thing to experience ns life....

UTT look freaking yummy in the show CHASE....

he was this long hair fair tall guy with specs... awww ma kind of guy... haizzz.....

Well make frens with this grp of cute japanese guys during their transit stay in the airport...

its damn freaking hard to communicate with them... They are so good looking but WTH??...

they dun understand simple english...

well one of them manage to tell me"u got a COOL HAIRSTYLE"...

haizz of course lah he say cool cause he got almost the same hairstyle like me...

but i just lorves looking at their hairstyle... coolness man.. back in japan... it's no longer a trend to that kind of hairstyle cause almost everione there haf that kind of haircut...

i was blushing like hell wen one of ma fren fren say she loves to look at me cause she say i got a nice sense of style.... Well maybe it's kinda of rare to find gerls werking in airport dressing like the way i am.. well not to say i got the style... wat i mean is that ma werk uniform is cool and mostly i wear ma street shoes and pants...

and mostly of the gerls there are so "KAKAK".... rebond long hair,heavy make up,black tight pants and u noe lah all that..

well maybe most of the malay gerl found there werk as the customer service officer or the perfume and cosmectic promoter... that's conclude on the way they dress...

well i shd praise her instead cause she so freaking preety..... she even ask me to join them the next tyme they go clubbing.. WELL... for this matter.. thanx but heh NO... well i just dun like... maybe we hang out go shopping aite...

haizz... the CUTE mr coffee guy quit liao... he's guin poly and dont think he can werk as well..

eh dun think im talking aout 17 plus guy ar.. he's the same age as me but he wwent jc before realising he making the wrong choice.... PPL.... realising their mistake onli after things happen...

but i haf a great tyme CHATTING with u though even nowing it wld be the last.... haizzzz....

ok i wana sleep....

2005-03-05T23:01:00.000-08:00

..........CoFfEe AnIoNe?............

White noise.... well not to my expectation even though i admit i did scream the loudest...

i dun even understand what the story was about... i mean i noe his wife die and the soul trying to tell him sumthing bla blabla... but who was the "green day" ghost?? why are they always there?? and why he die in the end?? and... well there's loads more to ask.. HAIZZ...

well but it was pure fun.. Everione was there... even our master betty.. cool...

it was a rarely outing as it's hard to haf the complete set of us.. and yesterdae we made it...

sat beside this "small kid" and he keep pinching my hand whenever he feel scared..

and there's was once wen he shout and scared the hell out of me..haizz....

i had starbucks ice caramel machiato and it was nice during the first few sips... but feel sick after too much of it...

didnt catch the last train...

so the east sider's.. ma,tweet,alif and fir share a cab home...

saw one of our ex classmates and oh ma gawd.. her baby is soooooooooo CUTE and soooooooo FAT..hahah.. yar man..

ma cuzzie bought me d addidas watch and it's in WHITE... haha.. yar.. WHITE man..

well i noe it sounds crazee cause i just sold ma red adiddas watch to khai and now im owning another one onli diff in color but hey it's FREE... so i did not exactly waste any money of mine.. hahz.. well she just haf the worst tyme in her life.. breaking up wit her love ones and i was there to keep her company.. and we go shopping and yar i get sumthing too..

MORAL of the story= Hanging out with depressed ppl are cool cause they will spend like hell and they wld even spend on you.. WOHOOOO... coolness... ok im bad... but no worries.. she haf loads of others suitors so no prob aite ma dear gerl..

no use crying over MENSLUTS... haha...

(i haf frens like that u noe...) ;)

i reali badly wanted to get thirteen senses cd but the price is still HIGH and it just drop down to 7 bux over a mth..

i wld definitely buy wen it reach the rite price...

bubu told me the early november new album is out but well we search and nah... nuthing..

nvm...

Well i get to hear TCTC by chance and they are cool man.. cool indie's guys with cool style and cool music..

well for ur info TCTC= The cooper temple clause..

yar it's freaking long...

still havent get ma paid but well i dun reali look forward to it.. maybe i clear all ma bills and i still haf cash on me and not looking forward to buy anything so it's alrite.. in fact i still haf untouch amount in ma bank... dun noe wat to spend lor..

maybe im guin to simple plan consert or maybe not..

well just for the sake of DAVID... the ever cute meddley bassist...

ok im crapping....

wana bath and WERk..

blardi werk...

2005-03-02T09:10:00.000-08:00

.......CoFfEe+HiM= BaCKhAcHe.......

Ma back hurts like mad lately... im just 19 and ma back hurts like sumones who oredi in her fifties... haizzz......

Todae was the 1st tennis lesson and yar it was fun... but i dun haf the energy though cause i been active for this wk... i nd a MASSAGE..... but i dun wana sumone else to do that except for ma lovely grandma but guin over to her place will be a painful journey for me...

i was dreaming the whole tyme and didnt get to hit the ball consistently... and yar i admit im LAZI.. haha... im lazi to even swing ma arms up... the suckiest part.. graduating students will not haf a chance to be part of the IVP teams... we will be sponsored and stuff... Haizzz.....

I may be the one with the most lacking of concentration but i do win over stamina.. haha...

i was 1st in the warming down run and didnt haf to run another rounds... so the run will continue until the last runner.. pity those who haf to run more than twice.. tiring sia...

yesterdae had latte at macafe and they all HATE it... cause i was so tired and yawning all the way until that cup of latte save me.... and i was blabbering all way long...

and it's seem worse wen we ran into .......hehz...

And goodness ite TAMPINES sUCKS... hah sori peeps but yar... the school was not that reali big but all the places was hidden.... the canteen was below the foyer where they haf their assembly... WEIRD....

and i as forever the MISS CONFIDENT arrive there at 4.10 wen supposely lesson start at 5...

and than this fatty... instead of showing me the way to the tennis court he show me the way to the street soccer court.... and it was too late wen i realised i just step into a bunch of blardi smelly guys... so i just plug in ma earphones and blast the music out frm ma mp3 and walk away pretending that i was sure of where i was guin...

and yar.. wat do u expect?? of course i get weird stares frm them...

haizzzz....

and their ice mountain cost onli 40 cents while i pay 60 cents here...

HAIZZZZ..... but their drinks stall so cute.. wahaha remind me of kindergarden daes cause they sell tibits that will delight small kids..

And the worst part, i was sitting in sum area wen this cute chubby chinese guy sit infront of me and CRY...

wahhhhhhhhhhhhh... y cry infront of me... he was sobbing so loudly...

I ignored it at 1st but than i get stares frm others.. so before they thgt i MOLEST him i change sits.. HAIZZ... weird school weird ppl... hahah....

i went to ite tamp b4 but that was 2 plus yrs ago and ma blardi dearest fren say i was stupid not to remember where the canteen is... NB... it was more than 2yrs ago and u expect me to remember wen i cant even remember stuffs that's are 2 wks old.....

hey temptation island is back on channel 5.. everi tues at 1 am in the morning..

Catch it... COOL show... i thgt i was the onli ones who was so addicted to reality tv shows... but HEY i was wrong.. the ever vain khai watch this stuff too...

and Amazing race just now was ok2.... i love the faggots teams... i think they gona win the race cause they mite be soft and WHINY but they pick up things easily and they are supportive of each other.. and the way they play the game.. they reali haf ma respect..

but it still sux to watch frens,couples,brothers,sister,mum,son,dad,daughter and so on lah fite just to WIN... the way they argue sumtimes may jeapordise the chances of winning cause they take a whole load of tyme to consider whose idea wld be the best.. by than other teams wld haf arrived.....

So the best qualities u nd to posessed in this game will be PATIENT and staying CALM at all times...

it wont lead to fites and it will settle things much more faster without any hassle...

yeah man... how good it is if ppl can stay calm and not just SHOOT their ugly stinky mouth wen arguments or misunderstandings occur...It's BAD u noe... u mite not noes where u STINKY mouth will lead u too.....

2005-02-28T04:52:00.000-08:00

.........CoNgRaTs.........

Congrats to sis for passing her o levels.... she did quite well i must say and im so proud of her...

Mum and dad was overjoyed..... well u noe wat dad got her?? he gave her his new hp... ma sis was overjoyed like usual... and hell yar u all shd be mad... at the age of 16 she haf everything...

im gona buy her mp3 as promise.. haizzz burn lah duit aku....

and i noe dad motive... he's gona buy the new nokia phone.. thats why ha happily offer sis his onli two wks old phone to her...

well she deserve that... and she get a B3 for sic.. nb cb.. guess she watch too much animal planet and national geographic channel..

and dad bough pizza hut to celebrate the event... i hope she will get the course that she been eyeing all this while...

well frankly i feel terrible... casue i shd haf been to poly if not for ma laziness...

the choices of course make me feel so sour....

but its ok... no use crying over spill milk.. CHEY....

haha...

2005-02-27T10:04:00.000-08:00

.............GaWd DaMn It............

oh gawd..... It was so close......Overall liverpool did a gd job.....

hell yar... liverpool did so well 2dae.. its not because im their no 1 fan im saying this... but its the fact.... chelsea play rough and i hate it.... even though i adore lampard but i was cursing and hating him just now... lampard show his ugly side 2dae..... everitime an argument arouse,

he was the 1st that i saw guin towards the refree and playeers... he was the ones who will raise his voice and shoot off his ugly mouth... haizz... dun ever blame GERRAD for what he did.. it was sumthing u haf to expect in a crucial game like this... he mean well and play well during the game... instead of criticise him,we shd sympathize over his mistake...

My hope was dashed in seconds.. guess what.. tears was just falling frm ma eyes.... i noe it sound crazi but im such a liverpool die hard fan that i can feel their pain and dissapointment... i just cant stop ma tears seeing gerrad crying over the loss...

but its ok... there will always be a nxt tyme.... even though they lose, they were the real winners with the real attitude playing in the real game.... kudos to garcia who went extra mile for his teams 2dae.. he was there everiwhere... frm defeanding to attacking.. he was just running everiwhere to grab the ball.. he shd play well like this everitime...

and i was laughing ma ass out wen mourinho get send off... BOOO and SERVE U RITE mr snobbish...

he such a faker... and who the hell he is to scold other team player wen the refree dun even say a word?? damn u snobbish fucker.. how i wish i marry u, kill yar and grab all ur money away... stupid ASS...

if gerrad made up his mind guin to chelsea or any big clubs... he mite as well go... so ppl wont keep saying gerrad is the one who play the game... it ill be a gd chance to show all that it was liverpool playing not GERRAD...

haizzz im such a nag now... haha... well like i say, i hate losing...

and u shd see baros argue with his fellow countryman.. haha it was so cute... they were arguing about sum stupid stuff and tries to hide it away frm the rest...

overall Liverpool still haf ma heart guin for them.....

haha.... I watch it with a grp of chelsea supporter... most of the police guys who was there, was cursing everitime pools make their way... and i feel like throwing ma bottle rite at their face...

luckily a grp of old uncles who werk as police officer too support pools.. maybe due to the fact that pools was once a WINNER in the older generation... and chelsea was such a newborn team that this age diff occurs...

and hey i get to buy ma perfume despite the terrible loss...

thanx to airport vouchers i onli pay 25 bux more for ma 80 plus perfumes... heee gd rite... LAME.... haha...

haizz... how i wish i get to werk more with faizal... but that super nb cb surpervisor of mine is such an asshole... haf u all ever heard of making chix mayo with milk??

wat the fuck?? who gona eat chix with milk... guess he grwon up in sumwhere kol the IDIOTS VILLE and thast why he act like ones...

ok im freaking tired.. will post more stories about this stupid wanabe gangster surpervisor of mine...

2005-02-25T02:54:00.000-08:00

.......LAZINESS.......

i think i inffected this disease frm alif.... sori dude.. but u did pass me this blardi disease..

Well... hmm to peeps out there... i noe u haf the rite to leave any comments on ma tagboard

and hell yar it dosent haf to be nice sweet words... anyway i appreciate ur comments and stuff but maybe about certain things that u are unsure off, just mind ur own business k...thanx....

Nafa test was a killer...

Sit up... as there were 9 of us, i was left with no partner... so i told ma teacher get me a cute handsome guy plss and i was kidding lah... and she reali got me this cute chinese guy who haf a deep dimple wen he smile.. cuteness...

but i thgt of playing cheat with ma partner since sit up we count to ourself... but nb.... this guy he so HONEST..

he count so loudly and nb he onli cheat for me ones and seem so proud by winking at me... yar thanx alot dude... it means nuthing anyway by one count... haizzz..

nvm u cute anyway...

and the rest was ok ok ar.. except for 2.4 i vomited yesterdae honey stars and ma teacher dun allowed me to continue...

i wanted to but she scared i mess up the track... nb...

so i just sit there trying not to throw up again... maybe due to ma medication pills i feel drowsy....

i can tahan but than this fatty ugly chinese guy who smell like rotten pig go and rub his armpit infront of me and the smell... goodness... that made me throw up staright away..

ewww.... wana vomit again lor...

and than FALIQ dear....haizzz

as u see i got super freaking long legs(duh) and its hard for us who haf long legs to do the sit and reach...

so ayu and faliq decided to tahan ma leg so it wont bend cause i reali haf LONG legs...

and dear faliq he push ma legs until ma nerves affect ma whole body and i cant even bend ma dear body... so i shout ask him to be gentle on it... and than onli i can stretch... hee not bad as i beat most of them.......

hah u guys shd see ma dear bubu run... wahahah soooooooo cute... and he run with ayu.. wahahahah the two of them look like they were playing catching.. hahhaa...

overall it still sucks... and haizzz most of ma dear frens fail sum station... it wont matter to us gerls but i pity the guys.... haizzz.... MAMPos ar krg.. NS.. whahahaa...

todae thgt of watching movies with the kids but most back out alst min.. haha lazi and sum busi with sum stuff... so here i am... at hm... why?? not because i got no other plans... but im FREAKING lazi sia...

ma fren ask me to go over to his houz cause they haf sum sort of gathering as his parents was away on business trips....

i was like cool... can see them after long last as we all are busi with own stuff.... and sum of them get to book out todae while sum taken the dae off....

so it's the perfect tyme for a gathering.... xbox,karaoke, lcd screen tv for movies... WOW....

but again i feel so lazi to go over even though its onli 2 blocks away...

but promise is a promise so i be guin in few mins tyme... arghhhhhhhh lazi siak...

but than i wana mit ma dear daniel whom been mia for soooooooo long... ehz.. confirm dah berg sia skrg....

but still kau tetap sotong.. wahahha...

and i can gett kinky with linda... wahahahah... her boobs now looks like she haf a transplant.. wahahahaa... ok sori ar linda.... u wld always be our pamela anderson darls.. muax... and yar... pics are ups dear... u guys say wana peek at ma other kool club.. whaah... go and peek now... i even capture sum photos in our school u... so u can look at how cute we are and drool over us.. wahahha...

but guys sorie... ma school buddies consists loads of guys than gerls... so 4get about getting drool unless u guys look at ME. wahahahahahah....

eh i think ma post freaking long.. okok...

and to yan and faz......

we watch movie nxt wk or sumthign k.. sori for last min cancelation... i nd to werk 2morow... sorie.. :( and i miss u guys... hurhurhur....

cross ma fingers for 2morow match... chelsea and liverpool... hope pool win and thrash down the oredi thrashed teams... hope chelsea face failure again and again and again... wahaha.. cool sia...

haizz.... it seems that the england team sux this tyme.... arsenal,chelse & even MAN U lost...

well wat do u expexct?? ac milan barcelona are sum few team that excel well....

PS:"2 the gerl whom loves to leave comment and keep saying we are KIDS....

well i reali hope that u noe wat the meaning of KIDS...

yes we love to goof ard like kids and we are not those kakak2 or abang2 to act mature and kool all the way... so i guess u went to the rite blog and diss the rite person.. wahahhaha.. hope u noe wat i mean LADY.."

2005-02-24T05:27:00.000-08:00

..........MaTuReD. BAH........

hmm.. ppl just wont get enuff man... haha... well.. in ma life this is ma ever 1st tyme i was label INMATURED....

wahaha... childish?? haha... oh ma gawd.....

well it's true im childish imatured and stuff....

wahahahaa... funni lah AWAK nie...

because im no KAKAK2 lor... hmmm childish??? deleting links just because of a misunderstanding= not childish?? haha..

well nvm... all of us whom been deleted was like PHEW.....hahaha... ok ok....

in other terms we were like cool... yeay... no more links to yar...

Maybe there still sum more u shd delete aite... they are wondering why u didnt delete them... hahz...

well nvm... hmmm.....

and just now we were label as RUDE by our pjt teacher just because we go for our self-proclaim break..arghhh we always did that wat for the past 1 yr plus.. haiz...

and hmm almost all of us bought roti john frm the new shop...

except frm mon and khus... they aint cool man..

well i share mine with fir while tweet share his with alif(but later bought one more for himself) while faliq as usual ate his OWN share... faliq thgt of buying sumore but ma dearest bro haf to keep a lookout for his weight... he haf to maintain it so that he wont be put in other class in his silat grp..

well i dun reali understand but nvm....

alif was flirting ard with this chinese twins.. i was amazed cause i thgt that khai's was the onli twins in our school... their name hahaha funni sia..

one was kol yao sing and the other was kol yao wen but i happily thgt she was kol yao seng....

wahaha......

SHIT.... 2morow nafa test.. hurhurhurhru... gawd damn it...

early in the morning and we haf to run... nb cb...

im like so easy 2 wake up like that and they haf to conduct it early in the morning where ma eyes are still close and all i yearn is ma bed... HAIZZZZZZZZZZ... amnd i bet that super muscular teacher of us gona blaze us as we haf been absent for like dun noe how many weeks... HAIZZZZZz... well hope we gona run with HMMM.. hah... well who noes... he's such a fast runner and i will run after him and poom... maybe i pass ma 2.4... wahaha.. CRAPS....

"run,run while you can..dont let time slip thru ur hands..." how true that is... so i will nvr ever let chances blew again if he ever give me that chance...

i will always be readi to pick up his kols no matter how crucial that moment is... even in the movies so alif wont curse me more pimples.....

haizzzzzzzzzz..... ok outback jack is on the block... wana see all this bimbo trying to live in the jungles just to get the ever yummylicious jack...

overall stupid show but who cares... i lurf the stupidness.. haha.. nitesssssssssssss

P.S.... " shd i go on a date 2morow with that super cute indra but who's long winded and lurf to ask stupid things.. well ma heart say 50 50.. if onli it's the other..opps... i wld GO... haha"

2005-02-23T06:24:00.000-08:00

..............*CuTeNeSs*.............

To the bpoyans brotehrs out there... im not losing to u guys...

i will recruit cute jawa bros and destroy u BOYANS....

wahahahahah...

ok craps... just sum stupid debate about boyans and jawa... wth?? haha

hmm despite everything im still hapi with life... these things are prone to happen...

like i say shits happens and ur journey of life will not be as smooth as u want.....

watching american idol and it rocks big tymes...

ma fav..."ANTHONY FEDERo sumthing...

his name so weird ar... but netherless he's such a fine young next door lad..

he reali look like chemical romance bassist...

lemme haf him plssssssssss... haha... and his voice speak up for him.... a young lad with big voice.... so melodic... the romantic kinda of voice... the one that any gerls wld lurves to hear at a romantic dinner.. haizzzzzzzzzz.. haha...

well we need "chemistry remember?'' "winks" haha...

and the contestants this season.. trust me all freaking young and wow almost all haf the looks... and i mean real looks... in their own way...

The ladies: young cute,preeti sweet and celena wld be ma fav.. short hair tann nice eyes and HUge voice i must say... like celine dion.. haha...

surprisingly simon lurves boa the rocker guy and hell yar he's rite... the rocker guy got the unique voice and sway away the audience... but too bad the cute ever meddley constatine blew it.. he choose a gd song but went off pitch at certain tymes... he got this cutey cat looks and he looks so adorable helpless wen the judge shower him with critics...

poor thing but still he can improve along the way as this was their 1st ever perfomance so give face lah...

and the young preeti curly blonde sweetie blew me away with her impersonation of dixie chix during the audition..

and she look so fine singing sum romantic country song todae... she the ones that i salute cause of her own identity... u go sweets...

and there's jared the guy who haf the latin looks with a nice voice...

And lindsey HOT... haha

ok guys go grab ur chances to peek at the silly photos of the battle btwn jawa and boyans... "craps"...

a"wat goes ard comes ard...." hah...

2005-02-22T09:15:00.000-08:00

.......WOW..u MeAn BuSiNeSs HuH....

1stly self denial is a weapon used for cowards who dun wana admit their mistake... oh well..

yar.... u may change or edit ur blog, the truth is everione sw it.. too late....

well... im too lazi to say anithing here... im not like sum ppl who publicised bad stuff about ppl on their homepage..

well those kids prone to do that..

oh well.//.. i wont want to add more fuel here...

so let settle it the way human do..

but one thing for sure....

i HAF my own grps of frens.. and i haf frens b4 entering ite....

wth?? and frens do mean more to me than anyting...

and hell yar... u wld be surprise if i say that i ever fite in sec schools because of frens and not becasue they hate me but because they WANT me.. ok im cocky cause of u damn it...

wat a pity... a sweet gerl whom i dun publicise anything bad in ma blog and nvr ever disturb her wrote all that....

and i dun even write bad things about ur BABEK...

i just say i HAD enuff....

and YOU haf to make things worse.. i guess u always do that....

and well who the ones who dun haf frens now??

who sigh or whines wen we dun ask them out?? who WLD??

well if u reali do haf loads of frens and dun give a damn about us...

u wont whine or wont add fuel here... u wld just leave us and wont even sit with us and stuff...

arr well im not bad to go into details....

well u mite be shock on how many ppl wan shoot ur mouth now... gee...

haizzzz

2005-02-21T06:20:00.000-08:00

.........TaStE Ur Own MediCiNe.........

Oh well im feeling so *&^%$#! ryte now...

no school 2morow and we haf a freaking outing to saf.....

hope it's gona be fun.... haizzz... most of them are guin....

ME... if i can wake up i will....

And yar.....

MA recent post haf nuthing to do with u.......

i reckon.. i say those clubbers i dun say all clubbers???

and why do u think im saying stuff about you?? if u say so that means u admit to all those shytes... are YOU?? ARE YOU??

i dun say names and i dun point fingers... why dun u get it ryte b4 acussing ppl??

i cant live with this stupid fake drama aite... from this point... IM NORASYIKIN got nuthing to do with u HANIF...

a bitch?? watever.. i dun mind.....

and yar..... i will see yar and just that... shake ur hands... NVR....

talk maybe yar...

and dun wori i dun pollute ppl minds like u think...

i dun need to suck up to ppl to haf frens aite...

oh well yar dun ask me... i just blew it away....

ppl make me and i haf to......

u noe wat ppl... im sick of leavinf in worlds with FAKERS....

if u dun like me or wat just say it out... or best still ignore me or dun talk to me... i get it... i wont get in ur way...

rather than u act like nuthing happens and write sumthing indirectly which suppose to be for US...

wth???

ok... i haf to accept the facts that sum ppl are lonely after their frens leave them and will do anything to DESTROY otherss...

in other words they are such a poor thing... cause the truth is they dun reali haf any frens and jealous of others... tsk tsk...

2005-02-20T07:54:00.000-08:00

.......ArGh SlEePy........

Ok im finally satisfied with ma new blog....

i edit most it...........

yesterdae had great fun went out with ma beloved sis and bro...

these two monkeys are so adorable but pain in the ass most of the tyme.....

we went to bugis haf our dinner at swenson and went shopping.....

bought a tee for sis and loads of goodies for ma cute bro....

waiting for food at swenson was HELL....

Mostly who dines in are families and they look at us like we sum lost child who cant afford to pay for our meals... sooriie eh...

55 bux for the whole meal and ma small bro ate the most... he had the cheeseburger kids meal plus the ice cream and he order the us fries as well...

so cute see he gobble up all the food....

ma sis had the pasta(NICE) and i had the sucky curry chix bake rice.... ownt eat that animore nxt tyme...

2dae was spent with famili again... went out to eat and dad feeling RICH again... he change his 6230 hp to 6670 hp.....

HIS REASON= he cant see the words on the screen... too small.. so he need bigger screen..

and i say dad that's bullshit and he laugh....

he so action....

he actuali wanted to buy the same model as me(7610) but he say use the same fon not cool... nb... so he bought the one that look like mine with a bit diff...(6670)

and he so jakun.. all dae long playing with his hp... but CUTE... heh...

mum gona change hers soon and im the one who sigh all dae long casue ma famili haf been hit by the hp disease...

mum gona get sum latest hp model for ma sis on her berfdae.. lucky bitch...

and ma new surpervisor look like sum ah beng... he look like sum apek gambler....

haizz... see his face wana puke sia... so ACTION...... nb.... see how long he can last...

im so tired now... gona slepp and 2morow got stupid school as usual...

cant wait to graduate and do stuff that i prefer....

nitesssssssss.............

2005-02-17T21:38:00.000-08:00

............*Everi bodi changing*............

Oh gawd i feel like laughing out loudly now... can i?? MUAHAHAHAHHHAHHAHA....

i just find it's amusing how fast ppl change...

well this so called couple whom i noe quite long ar...

The 1st tyme i knew them, they were clubbing freaks and all the brands and fashion they noe is like mango,zara and the guy im not sure ar maybe topman i guess...

and they wld look down on me and laugh at me cause im exactly the opposite of them i dun club and i dun listen to rnb,reggae and watever ar... u guys shd noe wat kind of music i loike and they say im stupid to listen to these kinds of music as they are super noisy and meaningless...

yes guys go and discriminate all these clubbers who dun noe how to listen to good bands... fucker... the guy even say the ataris is full of craps... ok i noe... he shd die and rot in hell...

and the gerl... the 1st tyme i went tanning with her, she wear like wana go clubbing.. haha stupid bitch... the sun so hot yet wear like that.. with belts all that.. haha.....

than now wah surfer babes and dude lah... i saw a pic of them recently and they were shopping at flash and splash.. wahahahah.... it's funni when the gerl wear roxy stussy stuff all cause she's a terrible MINAH sia.. haha...

and the guy... sibei now listen to yellowcard and even wear leather band(like ryan in the oc) and pose as sum rockstar..... NB CB... they are sum of the ppl who bringing down the good old image of the scene...

wahaahhahah if i ever see them straight in the face i wld say* amacam rockers ada baik tak*... wahahahah... they are just stupid foolls meant to be laugh at...

overall they sux... haha...

well faliq kena sabo by us... sorie bro.. and khai get his belated sabo as well or shd i say advanced?? wahaha...

everything was cool and good...

urban ego vocalist is sooooo super cute and king of leons bassists is all that i need...

well just watch after school rocks and saw a couple of cool vids.. head automatica was on and i blast off ma volume and dance ard.. wohoo madness.. afi.... it's been a while their vids been aired.. awesome...

wahahah i want to go paradigm and watch the bands 2morow but its ten bux.. wahahah.. haizzz nvm...(got wishing for armadale u noe) hehz....

well.... im sorie if these few weeks i feel tired and bored u guys.... i dun noe i just feel LETHARGIC......

ok it's been a while we guys watch movies togather so let's rock the houz sum of these daes aite...

2dae im werking and im gob=na see the fucking supervisor face and give him ma veri BLACK face...

haha... ok syikin is certainly cute...outz...

2005-02-15T07:01:00.000-08:00

........HApI BeRfDaE To Ma DeArEsT BrO.......

hapi berfdae dear bro...hope u haf a wonderful journey ahead and love yar to bits...

And why in the blue hell they vote hunter off??

they shd haf instaed vote off the gayish rob u noe...

he so skinny and so gayish... how to become a runway model?? haizzzz..........

it's sad me now that hunter no longer in the comp...

but nvm... jon is still in... the hawaian looking surfer dude... YUMMY....

and hell yar... i noe the winner yet i still follow up the episode... who's the winner?? well u go find out urself... wont spoil the fun...heh..

this freaking week i werk for onli a pathetic 1 dae... nb.. wen the place need staff, u beg me to werk but wen u haf a full force u just throw me aside... nb u asshole....

i swear im not gona help u animore in anything... just go and die duin ur own stuff...

well at least i get to watch gd shows on weekdaes now...

and im reali addicted to REALITY SHOW....

im hooked to manhunt,outback jack,high school reunion,the bachelor, but the one that i dun favour will be survivor....

amazing race.... well it's kinda of lagging cause it will be the same adventure routine for contestant and all they haf to do is speed up and play clever to win... and survivor... BORING....

it's so fake and for one million u haf to backstab,suffer,and even sacrifice to make it...

and worse of all,all they do is just tok bad behind ppl back...

BOO to that show......

ok... 2morow school starts at 9...

and lastly... go wish faliq hapi berfdae aite... nitesssssss

2005-02-14T07:02:00.000-08:00

.......*Hapi Valentine Dae*........

hapi valentines dae to everione of u... no matter u are single attach divorce or married..

and hapi berfdae to uncle dzafir and the sweetest fawa....(sorie i 4got dear)

well i dun reali celebrate valentines dae though but it's fun to watch ppl so obsessed with rosses on this dae... wahahaha... sum even bougth a bouquet of flower for $188... oh gawd...

haizzz well maybe love overcome that...

well believe it or not i did ever receive flowers for 2 valentines... but i didnt celebrate it...

we happen to hang out and HE surprise me with the rose, and sori but i hid it in ma bag.. wahaha... wat do u expexct frm sumone who so ignorant like me... sorie dude... but that is so sweet though...

well this yr im at home watching tv and lazing ard....

hey marron 5 guitarist is so super cute... well im watching the grammies now and franz fredinand sux before.. wahaha.. sorie but dun interest me..

well grammy is bored though cause well the grammys is always for the other generation of the music... it's more to old folks award i guess cause almost all the winners and star guest are of the area where older generation loves to watch and idolise...

well lately i learn alot about friendship...

as our journey of life goes, we tend to mit loads of new ppl of diff character... sad to say not all are the interesting or the the reliable type...

we might ran into backstabber,two faced,sumone who tends to rule us out ,suckers,liars,hypocrite,jealous bitch/jerks and much more... hell yar it's seem so scary but too bad we haf to go thru that....

and that's wen the point of our life seem disturbed by this pest...

well trust me... i dun live to care about what others mite think of me....

seriously i give no shyte to this...

well it's me....

if i dun like that sumone i will nvr say that ryte infront of her/him....

wat i wld do is that i wld just ignore them and wont tok to them that much.... i wouldnt even bother to tell others casue i dun belief in bitching behind ppl back... let others judge them their self...

im not the kind to influence ppl in with nasty thgts... but sadly sum ppl do that...

sum ppl wld scared to blog out their feelings but wat the hell do u care?? it's ur blog... just say it out man..

no use holding it back...

no use of u to mind wat others mite think of you..

heyto hell with shallow minded ppl... if they do wrong they haf the rights to feel that the post is for them...

and its gd if they noe.... maybe things mite turn better or just sour... who cares aniwae?? of course if u respect that person and like their company u wont haf anything bad to blog about them unless u are bitching ard ryte?? wahaaa.....

well sorie to say i dun give a fuck about ppl feelings... i aint no angel to mind others... if i dun like i wld just spit it out an if i respect u... sure i praise u for that...

well what ppl nowdaes is lack of courage... courage to show others wat they think... all they do is sucking up and be the good angel infont of others... haizz poor soul... get a life lah..

im writting this post maybe im irritaetd with ppl ard me... maybe.. it's all maybe... so if i gave u the cold shoulder u noe wat i mean... just step back aite...

well typically and basically i HATES

those sucking up suckers and those acting cute bitches...

im sorie but im not sexist...

sum gerls wld act cute patheticly, act and ask for sympathy just for the sake of a companion..

and they wld act cute and act gd so they could convince others that they are the good ones and she safe for keeps... nb cb..

for me... i wont let ppl like that bothers me...

all i want now is to actuali hope that sumdae sum ppl would agree with me.. for now i wont say anything and just keep to myself...it's no point lashing it out wen ppl dun understand u..

yeah..

maybe thast the reason i cant get along with gerls cause i just hate those girly gerls and i just hate those acting cute bitches... hate me if they want but i haf ma rytes to discriminate u assholes...

okok.... i stop here... just releasing ma anger all this while...

well last sat thgt of wana go to the mica gig but u haf to pay 5 freaking bux....

so we end up get the hell out there and proceed to town whee we mit the gang and bla bla bla...

and ma lovely MUNIRAH bought a whooooooo....

am i allowed to disclose that in ma blog??

wahaa.. well wat can i say is that... it's the other side of mon...

well everione haf to let their other side known sumtymes...

hahah....

ok... im gona sleep now... skool start at 8 2morow.. but for me it start at 9... hahah..

2005-02-11T10:30:00.000-08:00

....HaIl Me.. Im ThE GoDdEsS.....

1stly... HApi belated chinese new yr to all ma lovely chinese frens...

sori edd i cant make it to ur open houz.... werking ar...

well nuthing much just that this few daes i been wanting to change ma skins but im so flicker minded that i end up changing nuthing... nb...

yesterdae was spend hangign out with ma family... it was funcore but shops were still close that dae.. thgt of buying shoes..

2dae wen out slacking wit the bunch at town and than proceed to esplanade...

well 2dae was quite boring as everi one seem tired and lazi...

take sum stupid pics and pics are up... go check it out our stupid faces... we

met khai and nas at esplanade slack a while than went home...

and hell yar... chinese new yr... u all nvr go collect hong bao ar?? even on 1st dae i saw a couple of them lazing ard airport....

oh watever...

why wen i haf the money im so flicker minded of wat to buy and wen im broke i feel like wana buy the whole world... haizzzzzzzzzzzz

just now alif tweet and faliq left me alone wen this bapok tap ma shoulder and tok to me as if im his best fren... nb...

the bapok was the sales gerl at esprit....

ok i haf no idea of wat to blog.... it seems that this few daes ma mind is not at the rite state... and i seem to fall sick easily....

i wonder why im so weak these few daes??

i need ma antidote i guess and it lies in YOU wahaha.....

faliq berfdae is cuming and we all gona make him suffer like hell... cause he's the chief of sabo wen it comes to others... he will mix curry with powder with egg with dun noe wat else and sabor ppl...

i swear im gona put loads of unwanted stuff in there... muahaha....

i miz hanging out with ma other kool club gang...

all so busi... with gerlfrens lah, ns lah, werk lah....

well sumtymes it's gd to mix ard with older ppl....

it teaches and prepared us for our future life...

congrats to ma frens whose gona be a dad to a lovely pair of TWINS....

wahaha i cant wait man... sure i will steal ur twins away frm yar...

well i hope he gona be a gd dad... hope u gona be serious and stop all ur nonsense...

for goodness sake ur 26 wokey??

damn.... im so jealous u gona haf twins... it's not easy to get wokey??

well im gona snooze off...... nites...

2005-02-07T07:11:00.000-08:00

.... Gd looks mean nuthing....

thanx faliq and tweet for ur giant earth quake at swenson just now...

and thanx to the yummy ice cream i haf a blardi painful sore throat now

and i feel like punching ma throat....

haha but it's was fun... the whole 8 of us with ite uniforms walk in like we are damn loaded...

haha...

and hell yar it was so KECOH...

haha....

maybe we are too bored waiting for the ice creams and the guys start pouring salt into each other drinks...

i dun noe how many glass of water we haf to ask again but it's worthwhile cause the guy serving us was sooo cute.. hahaaha

hmm.... well it was just simply pure fun... i mean it's kinda of rare for us to gather and haf yummy ice cream always...

on the way back i was so unfortunate to meet HIM...

well he got himself a preeti sweet gf which i noe he will cause he got the LOOKS....

but hey looks means nothing....

well i noe i let u down once but u in pain not because of losing me but because of ur ego...

cause u noe u haf the looks which gerls drools over and it will be a shame if a simple gerl like me to dump u..

and i guess ur pride is hurting not ur heart...

i haf no regrets letting u go u vain assholes.. the looks on ur face just now make me wana laugh it out...

im not jealous at all... nah im not...

and i dun regret of not being by ur side now...

im just amused cause it's me who dump u HELLOW?? and u act like im the one who lose out...

thats why i always belief good looks aint nothing if u dun haf the heart...

so what if u are such a fucking gd looking lad but u are such a blardi jerk/bitch??

well all i can say is... dun ever trust looks for ur happiness...

it's the hearts that matter....